Would this be a mistake?

[Glow23]

I am currently on maternity leave and have a 11 month and a 4 week old. I am due to return to work in April. A job opportunity has arisen with a pay rise but same hours/days WIBU to cut my maternity leave short to take this job? I was thinking to return in January rather than April as planned. Will I regret this time with the babies?

Take the job.

I went back when both mine were 5 months old. When the youngest was little I took on a senior role with a much higher salary. This has meant that at 56 I have taken my pension, stepped back to a PT role and dropped a day. Yes, I missed time when the girls were little but it means that I have the time and money to relax a little now and spend quality time with them on long weekends. I feel like I have my life back.
It’s swings and roundabouts for us all ( complicated in my case by being the sole parent). My friends who were PT and on lower incomes, with far less stress when their kids were small, are now working incredibly hard to make up their pensions. Personally, I’m glad I threw everything into it when I had the energy! 56 feels very different to 26 in my field of work! It’s worth looking at the long term picture.

I’d second this!! I was lucky to have 18 months off with my twins and now they’re 4 starting school it honestly gives me so much comfort knowing i had that time to just be a mummy, you really don’t get those days back and it wasn’t until they got older it really hit me!

I think the fact that you are asking means you already know what you want to do you just need a little validation and push to do it.

Guilt free zone! Do you want the job? It's ok to want to be ambitious at work AND be an amazing mum. Especially if that means you can provide for them better because that's being a good mum too.

I was back at work with a 4 month old, it was fine. I loved the hours I did have with my babies, I felt confident working. DH did 50% parenting properly, I.e sick days, nursery drop offs, all shared fairly and equally. That helps - unless you are able to afford a nanny.

You say ‘same hours, same days’ - does that mean it is not full time?

Anyway, if it suits you, go for it!

If same company then maybe they would hold the job for you? Go for it and make the decision afterwards

TBH I think it would be good for your baby to have longer with you if possible.

There is noone but you that can answer this. Personally I opted to be a sahm. A friend of mine went back to work after 1 month which was the right decision for her because she was deeply unhappy so the baby probably was better cared for by nanny. There is no "right or wrong" but I would ask myself :

• Am I the best carer for my child? Which would depend on - Am I happy caring for my child? Only you got the answer.

I’ve always had the mindset ‘Job opportunities will come and go but you will never get back time with your babies’ but I know most women on mumsnet are very career oriented and earn £200k🤣

Get the job, perhaps DH can do one day with the kids and you do one day with the kids too. You’ll make it work.

For a long time maternity leave was only 12-14 weeks, so 5 months isn't going back too early in the global scheme of things.

If you will enjoy work and your family will benefit from the additional income, go for it.

I went back to work when my eldest was 11 weeks old. Full time but condensed to 4.5 days a week. It was so difficult to begin with, but it was the best thing I could have done career-wise and I don’t regret it for a second.

Take it. I have no regrets that I worked full time and took all the promotions when mine were babies. No you won't get the time back, but you will never get any time back. Yes, I missed out on some finger-painting baby classes - but now I'm so senior I have all the flexibility, and the money to offer my kids the best life. Both kids and I enjoy the time we spend together much more at this stage of our lives, and this is only possible because I 'leaned in', as corny as it sounds.

If you can manage it I’d take the job. Things are so expensive right now, I’d grab any opportunity for extra money.

Would you definitely have to cut short your mat leave? I moved internally on mat leave and they just kept me on leave until the original return date anyway

This.

Have you actually been offered the job? Or are you deciding whether to apply. If the latter, apply and have the conversations.

No one can answer that for you of course, only you know how you feel about spending more time with your babies, or not. No one’s right or wrong.
Definitely worth asking if they’d delay the Jan start job, if they want you they might.
I was off work as long as possible, about 18months in the end, and then a staggered start back. Don’t regret that at all, I wish I’d had more time, I loved it. Miss those days!

I’m not sure where people are getting the five months from. Baby is 4 weeks now so will be at least 7 months by start of April.
I went back when both of mine were 4 months (it was a different time) and they have both grown up wonderfully.

Recently I interviewed some mothers for a research project and several mentioned depression when off on long maternity leave. Some people need to go back to work sooner than others, whether it be for financial, career prospects or mental health issues.
My main concern would be that you have two young babies, not one. But, if you have your support structures in place then grasp the opportunity offered. And good luck - from one who went through similar and came out the other side!

There must be significant pros to this for you to even be considering it or for you to find enough motivation to apply for this at this stage. No one else can know if you might regret it later on ,depends on the work stress, hours, commute, child care provision, how hands on their dad is ,how you enjoy the non work time etc etc. I really don't think in the future you'll think about the actual 12 weeks early bit. So it depends on what you can put in place and of the return is smooth and positive in all sorts of ways.

Whereas mine are now 24 and I’m glad I put as much in my pension when they were younger so I can slow down a bit in my early fifties. It’s horses for courses.

With two such young children close together ,I can see the benefits of not being at home ,possibly feeling isolated and not yourself and reaping the benefits long term and short term of a good career. It really is horses for courses.

I personally wouldn’t have been able to leave mine at only five months old. Maybe if you have family looking after them instead or a nursery/childminder setting that would be better but still. You have years ahead of you to work and work your way up but you never get your baby’s first year back.

If you know you want to keep working and it's a great opportunity then it's worth it for the long-game. I went back to work full time after 6 months maternity leave with my twins and the perks it afforded me now 7 years later were well worth it.

The difference is that my DH then did 6 months of leave with them so they weren't going straight into nursery, but yours will run later than that.

Whether you go back when baby is five months or eight months doesn’t make a massive amount of difference in the grand scheme of things. You’ll get people on here who will always say not to put babies in nursery until they are 2 or 3 but they don’t realise that’s not real life for many people. If it’s a good enough opportunity and it’s right for your family then do it. Your babies will be fine.

It's totally doable but its really up to you. You'll have to weigh in missing milestones, baby blues, childcare management, etc.
If important things are covered and youre happy with the arrangements then go for it.