To wonder how people are coping?

[CobbleWobble]

We are very lucky, I know this.

We are "Mumsnet rich" both have professional jobs with good salaries (£170k household income) and yet this last 12 months:

• removed children from private school
• changed how we do the weekly shop to reduce costs
• cut subscriptions (like Disney+ etc)
• reduced what I bought in the back to school shop
• decided against a holiday in October half term
• concerned about our usual Christmas food order

What is going on? I just don't understand why or how prices are rising as they are or how people on less than us are coping!

I'm extremely grateful we have the things to cut that we have but we've also had to remortgage this year which has doubled our mortgage payments and then our utilities have increased and the food shop has just got insane.

We have other things we can cut - a holiday in the UK, Netflix, the monthly takeaway but its just miserable to think we may need to do that just not to be living.

Happy to post spending particulars if people are finding it hard to see where I'm coming from.

So AIBU to think that as a country we cannot go on with prices rising like this? How are others coping?

It’s all down to housing costs I would imagine. If you bought in the last 10 years or privately rent it will be difficult in comparison to someone earning much less with mortgage paid off or housing association rent.

Wow OP we have about £110k household income and feel very well off tbh, we save about 1k per month, go on two holidays a year and although our DC don’t go to private school they both have very expensive hobbies. We do live in a cheap area right enough and are very frugal in other ways (I grew up dirt poor and some habits are just ingrained).

I agree with this - the average 5 year fix in 2019 was 2.5% its now pretty well double that. If OP had calculated that they could afford say £3k pcm in mortgage payments in 2019 then she'd be looking at 5.5 now - that would leave £3,500 ish to cover everything else - so no way to pay those private fees. I'm going to assume OP is in London - the cheapest 4 bed house in my not that nice part of south London is just under £1.5 million which OP would struggle to afford at current interest rates without a big deposit.

Chances are one of the earners is in the £100-125K bracket with a marginal tax rate of 60% as well.

Having said that they are still far better off than many - just not as well off as they expected to be when they first bought their house and put their children in to private school.

@Onemorepenny I'm at the age where I want to feel more comfortable & not budget so much. God knows what council tax & utilities will increase to, that definitely puts me off.

we are mumsnet rich -

cringe, right there.

Yes I have 2. Past the childcare stage. Just a small amount for afterschool fees but it’s not a lot.

If you could provide the following, you would probably get more helpful answers rather than loads of people saying - I get 10% of your household income and I live like a queen!

*Which area of the country do you live in? Town would be helpful.
*Where do you work?
*Mortgage payments - how much were you paying? How much are they now?
*How big is your house? Detached? Terrace?
*School fees - how much were they per term? Primary or Secondary?
*How many DC do you have and their ages?

Loads of people are pulling in expenditure at the moment, I suspect what you have saved in school fees have been swallowed up by increased mortgage payments and inflation so as a result you don't feel better off.

Ok. I am not young. Tell me what I’m missing that someone on 170k can’t afford Disney +?

That’s a very large salary I could only dream of. My partner earns 42k and I have to stay at home with the children because we would be worse off with me working.

im guessing firstly because you have a large income you probably have larger long term commitment costs. Like a big mortgage? I’m assuming your home may be a reasonable size too so your bills will probably be higher than many other people’s?

we have Amazon prime and Netflix but that’s about it. We have to budget and meal plan and there’s little room for luxuries. We get most of our clothes from Vinted, shein primark ect. Occasional treats must be saved up for. Neither of us drive either at the moment so that’s another cost we don’t have to worry about. That’s another thing, do you have an expensive car?

@Statsquestion1 I'm surprised you can pay all your bills and expenses out of 2k ish

Our combined income is about 1/3 yours. Just got back from 1 week holiday in Spain and that really highlighted to me how expensive food is here in comparison. Currently reigning it right back in. Resolutions include Waitrose only once a month, shop more at Lidls, more vegetarian dishes, organic chicken once a week. Take packed lunch to work. 2 boys at home, eldest has casual
work and I’m asking him to pay for his statutory daily chicken out of his income.

I am retired, mortgage-free and live on about an eighth of the OP's income and still manage to pay for Disney plus. I am worried about the relentless price rises but £4.99 for Disney plus is neither here nor there in the scheme of things when I see what a basic shop comes in at. Also I can only rarely afford to go out so I really like being able to watch films, ect at home as a cinema ticket plus travel to town and some basic refreshments come in at around £25-£30 so £4.99 seems like a bargain

“Higher salaries often come with higher outgoings. I know that we pay a fortune on mortgage, council tax, insurance"

I've no idea who said this as I am quoting a quote but to me this sums up the thread. People GENUINELY believe they should be pitied because they have bought expensive things, with their big salaries, and now have to maintain them. Or even feel that they are entitled to more things, and need more things on top of the things, so how the fuck can they be expected to manage?

I work for a charity for marginalised and vulnerable families, ex-offenders, street homeless etc and one of our staff declared without a hint of irony that she felt terribly sorry for her son (solicitor) as he had a big house and needed a new car, but it was ok for me as I didn't have much in the first place. I read somewhere they call it "money dysmorphia" - where comfortably off people have lost the ability to think rationally about how much they have.

How? Our income is similar to the op's and we have a very small mortgage but sending both kids to private school (9 grand a term so 54k a year of post tax income) isn't on the table. It might be if we never went on holiday and pulled them out of every extra curricular activity but I really don't see any way to have a decent lifestyle and pay for private school on that income?

@limescale you are missing the context of my posts with another poster. My first post said I didn't understand how Disney + was unaffordable, that's the problem with jumping into a conversation...

And since when was council tax based on the size of your house?

Higher salaries only come with higher outgoings due to lifestyle creep and keeping up with the Joneses. A lot of wealthy people act like they’re being forced into this lifestyle.

I don't see why it matters if you have 'diaposable' income left after you have a fantastic house, schools, holidays etc. That's what you chose to spend the money on. It was disposable - and now it's been disposed of. If that means a less extravagant Christmas, that's a choice, not a necessity.

This is our budget. It’s based off of our pay with no overtime (we can sometimes have an extra 4-500.
Me 3100
DP 4100
CB 280
Total 7480
Housing
Mortgage: 1900.
Insurances(life, house): 150
Total Housing: 2050
Utilities
Electricity 150
Waste collection: 30
Broadband & TV: 70
Mobile phones x3: 60
Total Utilities: 310
Food & Groceries
Groceries & household food: 500
Dining out / takeaways: 200
Total Food: 700
Transportation
Fuel: 250
Car insurance & tax: 150
Maintenance & NCT: 100
Public transport / Parking: 20
Total Transport: 520
Education & Kids
School books, uniforms, fees: 50
Activities, sports, clubs: 50
Pocket money/treats: 60
Total Kids & Education: 160
Entertainment & Lifestyle
Family outings, hobbies, gifts: 200
Subscriptions, books, etc.: 60
Miscellaneous expenses (haircuts,nails): 60
Personal spends: 200 x 2 = 400
Total Entertainment: 730
Savings & Miscellaneous
Emergency fund / Savings: 2,000
Holidays (monthly allocation): 500
Clothing: 200
Miscellaneous buffer: 300
Total Savings & Misc.: 3,000
TOTAL MONTHLY SPENDING: 7,480

The issue isn't income, it's about what that income affords & because house prices are so distorted that income doesn't go where you expect it to.

Well - the Disney bit is stupid.

But my nursery is now £2,200 and mortgage is c. £3,000 (small terrace).

Add council tax etc and I’m looking at north of £6,000 a month to cover my direct debits.

Which is quite a scary sum..! Couple in a terraced house with a baby, nothing out of the ordinary really, just in London.

My household income is a quarter of yours. I have had 2 holidays abroad and another booked before the end of the year. I dont waste my money and overpay my mortgage on a small flat in a cheap area. I drive an 11 year old car and buy/sell clothes on Vinted. I feel like I spend my money carefully, looking for deals holidays are something I value spending my money on so I make other choices about car, home, clothes etc

As others have queried, is your mortgage huge? We're earning considerably less than that between us and whilst definitely feeling the huge increase in the cost of living I don't think we're at the point of having to excessively cut things from our budget. We don't have kids in private schools though, and own two cars which aren't old but also aren't brand new and definitely not top of the range. We are in the North of England too though so appreciate if you're in London area then we might be worlds apart.

I don’t understand these posts at all. I’m on minimum wage, can buy nice food and went on holiday this year. How on earth are you struggling.

@Statsquestion1 I assumed you earned 60k each & deducted pensions plus forgot about child benefit.

You are lucky to spend so little on dc. Mine have a few extracurriculars at schools & outside which adds up to at least double what you spend.

Can’t be bothered to read the thread but this is a wind up, guessing someone who is bored whilst the kids are at school.