I beginning to think that i need to find somewhere else rather then MN today.

[lizziemun]

Feel free to ignore me while i have a little rant .

So far today i have read a thread implying i am lazy because i am a SAHM, because i have a child over year old. I don't work because i cannot afford the costs in going back to work.

We have a car which we rely on so we are stupid. No we bought a house in an area which we could afford, but DH can only get to work by car as public transport would take 3 times longer to do the journey he does so he would never see his children.

So here my rant JUST GET ON WITH YOUR OWN LIFE AND FAMILY AND STOP JUDGING EVERYONE WHO DOES NOT DO WHAT YOU WOULD DO.

As i say i don't give a flying f*ck what/how other people live theirs lives i have my own.

Thank you i go back to being a lazy SAHM and clean the bathroom,hoover downstairs, wash the kitchen floor before my youngest dd wakes up .

Well I think one of the amazing things I have got from MN is exposure to whole groups of people that I otherwise wouldn't really come into contact with. I have learned so much about other people's lifestyles and choices it's amazing.

It gives you the opportunity that you otherwise might not have in real life to discuss and learn about all sorts of things, find other people who share your viewpoint and hear from those who do not, both of which can be incredibly useful.

Some people are judgey, I think we all are to an extent, some express it more than others.

But if people judging your choices bothers you, just steer clear of those particular threads.

I think some people can express an opinion different to yours in an articulate and intelligent way (occasionaly these people have changed how I think about things)

Some people are just opinionated and dont think care whether what they way will upset you.

We all have days where some pedant on Mumsnet upsets us...most people are very supportive, but there are a few on here who are probably here because they are too unpleasant to have any real friends. I call them the angry people - its generally the same ones and you are most likely not the first or last person they will upset. Just ignore the b*ggers and move on to a less contentious thread

thats "Some people are just opinionated and dont think care what they say will upset you"

I previewed that too

Differing opinions are A Good Thing. And the judgy ones can be great if they work you up enough to rethink something. Personally would be very bored if everyone just "understood" me. Much better to be challenged and stimulated even if you come away with exactly the same view (just with well-honed arguments to back it up!).

Try being a smoker on here LM. We're the Devil's daughters apparently.

I sometimes feel like the OP but have really enjoyed Mumsnet today!! DD is asleep, DS is at nursery and DH is away all week so I'm not too worried if it's a bit messy!!

I did change all the beds today though

Don't get upset just point it out that it's unreasonable and so damn what if you don't work. Be strong and stand up for yourself.

YOu forgot to say that unless you have painted toenails you will be judged as well.

BTW I'm not realy angry (may have a little bit of pmt ) i'm just a bit fed up that people seem to think they have the right to insult anyone who does things different to them.

As people who know me would agree that i am always up for a dicussion/arguement.

nickytwotimes I would come and do your cleaning execpt scotland a bit far to walk without a car .

James i'm not going anywhere (can't be doing with all thoose tickers]

Message withdrawn

What rebelmum1 said - if you have confidence in your opinion, stand up for it. But have an open enough mind to hear other's points of view as well. Not everyone else will do that, but if you do that's the best you can do I think.

If there's anything you might be sensitive about, don't ask for an opinion, because you will get it, and don't ask AIBU, because people might think you are!

Most people who have strong opinions can and do express them without personal insults, and if someone doesn't, either call them on it or ignore it I reckon. But if someone is expressing an opinion that differs from yours, don't take it personally. One of the best things about MN is that you can have a strong difference of opinion with someone on one thread, then talk to them about something perfectly trivial on another thread with no problem. It's happened to me a couple of times, from both sides, giving and receiving advice from people I'd very recently crossed swords with, and it's very refreshing and adult.

ive had a difficult MN week too - i keep saying i need a break........but my reasons are that people are telling me things i dont want to hear, but they are right and im wrong so IABU .

Fuck the anti SAHM brigade - they are just jealous

maybe a more concilliatory "dont give a flying f*ck" what anyone says about SAHM. i switch off MN and switch off

as am much maligned ft working mum, there are too many opinions bouncing around on it here anyhoo

I don't think i have every painted my toe nails, perhaps i should go and do them then .

I don't find anything particularly liberating about being a wage slave to be honest. My friends who stay at home are as happy as larry relaxed and perfectly chilled, whereas I on the other hand am clinging on by my fingertips most days, taking conf calls in my outside loo, trying to maintain a professional veneer when I'm too tired to remember to put my bra on or am at home with a sick child and have a chicken clucking in the background. But maybe that's just me

Dont be worring what anonymous mn's think. Its all bollox, we can be who ever we wanna be on here, so take it all with a pinch of salt, and if anyones interested, I havent changed my sheets in weeks!!

do you have video link?can they see the restless chooks, swinging boobs and you sat on the cludgie

lovin the image

Rebel, I am the same, strangely, my outside loo is a good little office space when on the phone!

Bra problem not occurred yet, although have left the house in odd shoes before!!

lizziemun, has anyone come out to you with that classic line- 'It's my opinion and you just don't want to hear it' yet?

They always do that when they are just bitchy.

or Ali G style "you is just jealous (of me) or summat like that"

When you get unfavourable reactions, It's not what they say but how they say it.

I just think that these people are either mad/rude or really rather jealous. I always ask myself 'do they have any friends?' because some of them seem to lack emotional intelligence.

lizzie, I don't know why you feel you need to justify your decision to be a SAHM.

"I don't work because i cannot afford the costs in going back to work.
We have a car which we rely on so we are stupid. No we bought a house in an area which we could afford, but DH can only get to work by car as public transport would take 3 times longer to do the journey he does so he would never see his children."

Thanks for all that information, but it really is only your business. To me it feels as if you are saying "Sorry for being a SAHM, but my reasons are financial, so please forgive me".

Message withdrawn

I'm generally a reasonable human being, but get me on some subjects and I'm a complete judgy pants. I bring my ball to the table and hope that people will lob it at my head. In return, I'll judgy pants them til the cows come home!

YANBU to be annoyed with people judging you for staying at home. That's just crass. As is judging women for going out to work.

Now people who smoke, drive, take drugs, feed their kids fruit shoots and eat McDonalds are all fair game. Did I mention earlier how reasonable I am??

(PS....am joking, tho not about the drugs...What's not to love about Maccy D's?)

frankly no one needs to justify their working/SAHM status here on MN. unfortunately some very vociferous frequent posters feel need to criticise and deride someone else choices.and they do

that whole debacle is toxic and divisive, and no one really benefits. well no one is actually going to actually say "oh i am so wrong for being a Working Mum/SAHM your sarcastic scathing generalisations have really wakened me up to your point of view"