To think that life gets easier when you stop engaging in wishful thinking?

[BeOpalRobin]

One of the best lessons I’ve learned is to see reality exactly as it is, without trying to sugarcoat things or hoping people will change when they won’t. It’s not about being negative, just practical. Have you found the same?

Indeed. Those who live in constant state of dreaming and wishing are perpetually disappointed and then on mumsnet to whinge about the reality. Facing reality is harder in the short term but much more efficient and sparing of emotions.

Totally agree.

When a close family was in their last days with a terminal illness someone told me to have hope. I could’ve punched them. Hope had totally let me down in the preceding months.

I found gratitude much more helpful, constructive, realistic and comforting. I find it’s easier to be thankful for what’s happened rather than hopeful for something that hasn’t happened. Ironic as I’m generally forward-looking and positive.

I very much subscribe to the Mel Robbin’s motto of “Let Them” which enables a sense of letting go of expectations and/or control.

Not really, no. My life improved when I adopted a more positive mindset - not sugarcoating or being delulu, but just entertaining the possibility that things might actually work out. Seems to have led to more things working out and goals being achieved. It’s basically manifestation-lite.