To not want a massage from someone who has a cold sore?

[Sunflowers842]

Ive been going to the same massage person regularly for years. But over the last year sometimes she has cold sores. Sometimes only one, sometimes more than one at a time. I understand and appreciate you get them from kissing someone with them and obviously im not kissing her but she is touching me including my head. I have anxiety. I'd be really happy to reschedule my appointment when she has one if she lets me know in advance but I dont want to offend her.

I’m afraid you’re just going to have to tell her and not worry about offending her if you feel so strongly. Or find someone else.

I'd feel the same. I know it's awful. The woman serving me at Specsavers the other week had one and it was all I could think about. All that touching things that I was touching...

YANBU, I’d struggle to relax too and that negates the point of a massage for me. Find someone else.

I would find someone else. It’s for her to assess how having regular cold sores is impacting her business.

I get the occasional cold sore. We get very good at not touching them and then touching other things. Largely because we don’t want to spread them to other parts of our own bodies!

Those people may also have been wearing transparent cold sore patches.

OP you’re fine to tell her you’d rather reschedule if she has a cold sore. If the cold sore comes up on the day of your appointment, though, are you willing to pay the cancellation fee? There’s no reason she can’t massage you, just your preference.

Would you ask her to wear a mask perhaps?

She will have trained in hygiene if she is working with clients and potentially dealing with intimate areas. So I would think transition risk is extremely low. Out of interest what would you think if a nurse or doctor had a cold sore?

But you’ve been going back to her and have never actually caught one. So what’s different now?

Unless she kisses you you will be fine.

It hurts to touch a cold sore so it's hardly likely she's going to be touching it anyway. She should also be wshing her hands before touching you as part of basic hygiene. The fact you have used her multiple times when she has had a cold sore and you haven't caught the virus should tell you something.