Son Keeps Breaking Glasses

[Warrior96]

Hi my son is 6 and needs to wear glasses, he has broken his glasses 4 times in one month. He keeps encouraging his younger brother to pull them off his face and break the arm on them. I ask him why he just keeps blaming his younger brother.

Due to he has broken so many frames the shop was out of his frames, so it took me 2 weeks to get another set. I got his glasses back yesterday and he has just gone and broke them again what am I suppose to do?

I have asked him if he doesn’t like wearing them I always get the same response it’s his younger brothers fault.

What consequences has he had for deliberately breaking them over and over?
He has proven he cannot be left unsupervised.

You can get ones that are silicone like frames. They cannot be broken.

Other than that I agree - what are the consequences?

He has lost his tablet time/ TV time and pudding.

That’s really useful advice thank you I didn’t know you can get silicone ones

Have you tried tomato glasses?

Is he choosing his own frames or is he being persuaded into one’s that are not his first choice?

I was a glasses wearing child - breaking them will happen and I don't remember DM telling me off a huge deal about it. We would just go and get a new pair.

However it does sound like there's an element of something going on in the interaction with the brother that's causing the breakages. It doesn't really matter who is starting it (though I'd be encouraging the younger sibling that no they are not for touching), no body should be touching his glasses except him.

I think what taught me over time to take more care was having to go for longer periods without them - if I didn't have them at school, I couldn't see and had to sit at front of class (or at the back and not see).

Is he involved in choosing the style, colour, case etc.? Might create vaguely more interest in keeping them safe.

Could he have the ones with a strap at the back, similar to goggles, rather than rigid arms that go over his ears? Have you spoken to the opticians to see what options are available?

I would try tomato glasses - my almost 3 year old has yet to break his and he’s had them for almost a year and is really quite rough with them. The hospital also wrote a prescription for 2 glasses in case he broke one - as young children tend too!

Specsavers do 2 for 1 so get a second pair so he’s never without.

My DD has worn Tomato glasses since she was 12 months old. She's now 10 and we've never had a broken pair.

Have you seen him encouraging his younger brother to break them? How old is younger brother - old enough to be sanctioned for breaking them so he doesn't do it even his brother asks him to?

How badly does he need the glasses? My DD was happy to keep hers on because she could see so much better with them on. She had them from age 2. We always had a spare pair though - most opticians will supply two.

It is hard because I can see that you do not want his glasses to be a source of strife or punishments, but the current situation is not workable.

So what’s come to light now the last time my son had his sight retested 2 months ago, he was in child frame glasses which were red with spider man on the side. The Opticians’s said he was too big for the children’s frames now (because he has a year till the next retest) and gave him standard frames which he doesn’t like.

You need to get the hard to break ones. You also need to clamp down hard on this with both of them. Glasses are a necessary piece of equipment, they are NOT toys and mustn't be treated as such.

They need big consequences, and a lot more supervision if he is encouraging his younger brother to snap them. I would actually go nuclear on this one.

I have worn glasses since I was 7 and I have never broken, scratched or lost a pair in my life - even with then-undiagnosed ADHD and a very destructive younger brother around. I'll admit I might be an extreme example, but breaking four pairs in one month can't be an accident.

I agree with the PP who mentioned the goggles-style glasses might be an option until he can be trusted to wear normal ones.

[Edit: cross-posted - just saw that he has given a reason now]

You remove food as a punishment?

"The Opticians said he was too big for the children’s frames now (because he has a year till the next retest)"

That cannot be right. Do you mean the prescription is too high or something? He's only 6, he is absolutely not too big unless he has a gigantic bonce on him. Take him back or take him to another optician and get him some frames he likes. He obviously felt like he couldn't say anything at the time (totally normal, not offering a judgement or anything on that) and now hates his grown up glasses. Not acceptable but tell him breaking them doesn't mean he doesn't have to wear them, so you'll work something out to get him some he really likes.

Deleted as duplicated.

Similar here, though I have worn them since I was three. Never lost or broken any. I did have a bit of wear and tear like a hinge loosening or a nose clip too, but other than that nothing.

My DD1 has worn glasses since she was 7. None broken or lost and she's 30 now.

No, she says no pudding as this is the fourth pair of glasses broken deliberately in a month. He's not going hungry.

Oh, come on now.

She didn't lock him in the Chokey with no dinner, she took away a treat because he misbehaved.

Yep the Opticians’s said he was too big for the children’s frames so my first action I’m going back to the opticians again and re-enquiring about the children’s frames. If I get the same answer I will go and talk to another opticians

I just don’t think it’s a good tactic.

And, it’s clearly not working, so… 🤷🏼‍♀️

And i thought my son was bad… we had i think 3 sets of broken glasses since February. He never breaks them intentionally, but he is very sporty and dance/gymnastics/judo aren’t kind to the frames.
He’s 8 now, had glasses since he was 4 and we average around 3-4 frames per year….

My enormous-headed sons (99th centile) were in children’s frames until about age 12