Friendship? What’s going on?

[Littlemissbubbles]

Ok! So a ‘good friend’ of 25 years. We had all our kids together, went through a lot, stress with schooling, exams, moving houses, teenage stuff Losing parents etc……
Well, over the last few years she’s distanced herself. I dont know why. I’ve asked if there’s anything, ‘no’ everything is fine’ , just been really busy’ you know’…. See her in passing regularly, she’s always with other friends “ she says, she’ll txt, we must get together….. I txt. Nothing…….’
I’ve now accepted she no longer wants to know, I’m sad…… but I’ve tried.
However I’ve found out that when she’s with other friends she’s asking about me and mine! And criticising!!!
I mean wtf…. I thought we were done. . But obviously not!!!
??
Aibu do I contact her yet again and ask what I’ve done
uanbu, fuck it, ignore

I'd just move on.

Definitely move on

Someone who will criticise you behind your back, and not speak up and tell you if you've done something that they're upset about, isn't worth worrying about. Stop giving her headspace, and find new friends.

It’s hurtful but probably best to leave it for now. Long friendships ebb and flow, she may come back in time.

The person who has told you about her criticising you (who by the way is a fucking stirrer!) obviously must know why this friend has gone off you. If you are curious and think it would help you get closure, ask them. They can hardly refuse to say, given the stirring they have already taken it upon themself to do.

Then move on, and focus on other friendships. It's sad, but friendships just do run their course. Unless you miraculously discover it was all due to a misunderstanding that can be cleared up, I wouldn't waste my emotional energy telling her what you think. What will it gain you?

Good luck. X

I would ignore, move on, and also ignore the person or people who are stirring by telling you this.

Obviously I don’t know her, but based upon purely on what you’ve described, it’s not sounding like a huge loss tbh. Semi-ghosting is one thing, it’s not great but people do it. But bad-mouthing you behind your back is unpleasant.

Unless by chance you’ve got a mutual shit-stirring lying friend, who is lying about her talking about you behind your back, and has also been lying to her telling her that you’ve been criticising her behind her back… and that’s why she’s distanced herself??

Thanks all, as I thought, relationships change. I’ll ignore. I’ll also not feed into the other source

Fuck her - nasty pathetic bitch - I would be really angry as well what a fucking nasty piece of work she is. You deserve better without this toxic bitch. I have had this myself best thing I ever did was phaze her out.

Move on, there’s a whole world of wonderful people out there to be friends with.