To think that not everyone is obsessed with making as much money as possible?

[MyShyShark]

It feels like a lot of people assume that financial success should be everyone’s top priority. But not everyone is constantly chasing a bigger salary, a promotion or investment opportunities. Some people genuinely prefer a simpler life, working just enough to be comfortable without the pressure to constantly “level up.”

Obviously, money is important for security and stability but isn’t there more to life than just filling your bank account? Or is that naive? AIBU?

I worked shifts for decades, management role, 40 hours a week, weekends, overtime, sometimes worked from 7am-11pm if someone called in sick, sometimes worked 10 days in succession, sometimes worked 6 days a week, 40-minute drive to work in a busy city centre.

I started a new job in January this year. Now I walk to work, I finish at 2pm on Mondays and Fridays, have weekends off, can go home at lunchtime to walk the dog.

That is my definition of success!

You are not BU if you are financially self sufficient however if you are claiming benefit top ups to subside your ‘simple pleasures’ lifestyle then, yes you are.

it depends. If you have 2 people, both earned 100k a year. Person 1 just spends it all, having fun and enjoying life- holidays/ dinners out. Person 2 doesn’t go out, saves every penny. Lives frugally. I personally don’t think it’s fair that despite the fact both people have earned the same money, that person 2 should have to then pay tax on money they have already paid taxes on just because he chose to save rather than spend. I think taxing him again is vilifying him for being wealthier than person 1.

Most people assume that wealth always comes from somewhere else than previously taxed income when actually it hasn’t.

The small market town where I’ve lived for the last 25 years has seen a huge influx of young ‘achievers’. Their grim determination and endless pursuit of ‘smashing’ goals and joyless ‘winning’, is a constant source of fascination for me. I probably need to get out more to be fair. 😁

YANBU OP.

I never earned a high salary or was career orientated. After I graduated I work for years in a university library and believe me I did it for love, not money! But DH was always highly driven and has always earned a lot of money. I've always been very happy to be the calm, contented place in our marriage and let him be the risk taking entrepreneur. It works really well for us.

Interestingly our DDs are polar opposites. DD1 went to art school and lives a very happy, but quiet life and favours the Slow Living aesthetic. She's a born home maker and adores her pets. DD2 is hugely ambitious, very driven and has a brilliant career ahead of her in corporate finance. She's never still and has already visited 9 countries this year.

But they're both very happy with their lifestyles. Obviously different lives suit different people. This can't be a revelation?

I think that’s fine op, but if anyone who doesn’t , needs to be happy with their choices and not resent or be envious of others who have more, everyone should be able to live the life they are happy with or able to without judgement. And I see a lot of resentment, someone says they earn a high salary, people pile in to say they are lying or boasting. People told that if they have a nice car or house, then it was parents or credit card, that they are shallow.

the reality is also many people have maximised their income in reality, they couldn’t garner the opportunities for more due to other life choices or limitations, that it’s not someone was offering them a big pay rise and they said no thanks, and their optimal is where they are at the lower end of the income scale. Not everyone is cut out to earn high numbers.

so I think there is nuance here, as limitations, drive, motivation, ability, skills, personality, all have a lot to do with it.

I also disagree people just want to build a bank balance, most do it as they want the life money brings. There is no joy in poverty.

Yes! Ive just gone back down the ladder - less money, less stress, no thinking about work after laptop is closed, no endless pointless meetings!! I am so much happier! Health & happiness is wealth!

No.

I am saying that working hard is not a guarantee of a higher income and having a higher income is not a guarantee that someone has worked hard.

To the OP:
It's easy to say that if you are comfortably off on what you earn and the simple life includes all the modern conveniences plus a bit. It's a bit dismissive of people who's aim is making as much money as possible to achieve what you already have.

And of course different people have different opinions of what they need to be comfortable, a one bed flat in an inner city or a 6 bed farmhouse in a rural area. A good old bike or a new SUV. Local nursery or a full time nanny. Enough money in the bank to pay next months bills or enough in the bank to retire early and still live comfortably (and maybe leave a nest egg for your children). It's nice to reach a point where you are happy with the money you have, but that will be vastly different for different people, good luck if your income balances your desires.

Money is a tool that enables other things. I am not motivated by money but I recognise that being this way is a privilege that not everyone can enjoy. I have the basics sorted, but if you’re scraping to afford the rent each month, then yes, money is going to be a motivating factor.

It isn’t just filling your bank account though.. it’s being able to see a health consultant of your choice when you’re concerned.. to give to charity, give your children an advantage, treat your family.. it’s the choices it affords you.

I wish I’d prioritise it a bit more at times might not be in the shit that we’re in now

When people say tax the wealthy they don’t mean people on 100K, they mean the top wealthiest people in the country who own more than you could ever dream of because they have acquired or inherited so much wealth that they earn millions on interest alone.

True wealth is generational. It’s land, property portfolios with skyscrapers in them, very large investments. A person on £100k without assets isn’t in the same category as someone who inherits millions or owns companies.

I think you will find the majority of the population consider £100k to be very high income earners and they absolutely consider them to be more taxable!

there are very few very wealthy people in their country relatively and they can move their assets easily. Therefore taxing the wealthy means taxing the group of high income earners who can’t move easily. This fall into the £100-£500k bracket. Lots of money on the face of it but after tax doesn’t put you into the super wealthy.

Health is wealth. You can be on a six figure salary, have assets, own companies, afford to regularly eat out, blah blah.. but if you don’t have good health, what is the point in striving to fill your bank account?

To be fair quite a lot of spent money is taxed again through VAT. Not everything attracts VAT, but dinners out do, uk holidays would. You might pay airport tax. If you frittered it all on pointy shoes you'd pay VAT.

YANBU, up to a point. There’s a certain level of income where of course money absolutely has to be top priority.

But once you’re at the point where you don’t have to worry about heating your home, running your car, clothing your children, putting food on the table and being able to socialise with your family and friends, once you reach that point I think your spending reflects your values in life.

Personally I don’t envy people with fancy cars and houses, because I know (unless it’s inherited wealth of course) that they probably have to make sacrifices to earn that much. They probably work long hours and experience a lot of stress. They might hang out in wealthy circles and feel under pressure to fit in - maybe their wealth brings them no additional happiness after all. Or they might just be very materialistic and having money and buying lots of things is the primary way they find satisfaction in life. Which is a sadness too, really.

I never hanker after money, I don’t believe it makes you any happier, I think only contentment with what you’ve got can do that.

So basically you're happy to earn sufficient money to live the life you want? Good for you, so do I. The life I want involves a lot of travelling, early retirement, security in case of unexpected events, good education for my children and financial support for them. These are the things that make me happy.

Sounds wonderful and very much deserved after all that hard slog!

Have you @MyShyShark or if you have a partner ever received an inheritance or likely to?
Have you ever had financial support from someone other than you ??
Money isn’t everything but it certainly makes life much easier, access to more things , support. I do my job as I want my children to have good food, travel, to help them with their future , to support them. My dh and I got zero financial help all of our lives and I find among people we know , we are in v much a minority.

Its a difficult one, because having money is an absolute game changer when it comes to health, wellbeing, opportunities for yourself and your children and your ability to get the most from life. It doesn't ward off every ill, but it makes every ill more easily tolerated, so I can understand why in our society people are driven to make more of it if they have the ability.
I think some people are less inclined this way, but ime, they tend to be those who are pretty comfortable and always have been, have some sort of safety net that will prevent them hitting rock bottom, so don't see why it would be necessary to build layers of wealth around themselves to feel safe.

You don't have to be constantly chasing a bigger salary but it really is advisable to aim to be financially secure.

All very well to talk about

genuinely prefer a simpler life, working just enough to be comfortable without the pressure to constantly “level up.”

But what happens when you have a crisis like losing your job through redundancy or ill health; you're given notice to quit by your landlord because you rent; or your car conks out and you need it for work?

I'd advise younger people to be ambitious and have at least some level of 'give' in your finances - a bit of money buys you a bit of freedom.

Some people just always want money and success

many others just want enough - but what is enough varies from person to person - large character. detached or small semi on an estate , eat out weekly or monthly

the less you crave things that money can buy the happier people seem to be

I think it’s ok to want to have enough money to live the life YOU want. I wanted to earn not have to worry about money. Today I paid 150 for a private consultation with a gastroenterologist and I had to pay 130 for a new tyre as I got a puncture last night. It annoyed me to have to spend the money but it didn’t worry me in the slightest. I work hard and save hard to be able to do that, nothing wrong with that.

Of course, but even if you don’t have health, money helps you live comfortably. And if you do have health, money absolutely makes life much more enjoyable. A nice house, a nice garden, a reliable car. Holidaying where you please, helping your children, not worrying about unexpected bills, being able to go out to the theatre, dinner, retire early, whatever, money helps, there is no way round it.