DH and I saw a musician on a TV chat show. They mentioned them touring, and as they’re not peak fame yet, it’s quite cheap and local. We decided to go. I booked and paid for tickets and booked us a hotel. I didn’t pay the flexible rate as didn’t think we needed to.
Fast forward to today and we were talking about it over text, he wanted to check there wasn’t a date clash. And then it came about that he had forgotten to book the next day off, and he is now tied into something with his job for that entire week that he absolutely cannot get out of. Not even sure if he will make it to the gig. He was very apologetic and I said ‘well, that’s the hotel money down the pan’. He came home with flowers and a bottle of wine as an apology and said that’s lovely, but doesn’t quite cover the hotel! He is now furious that I’m asking for it back as it ‘balances out’.
Im fine with it balancing out, but not when I’ve lost money because of his fuck up. He pays for our holidays and mortgage and seriously overpays the mortgage. I pay the bills as well as supporting DD thru Uni.
Am I the twat? He’s now talking about completely separating all finances eg if we want to holiday then I pay my half etc. I know lots of couples just have it in one pot, but it has always worked for us as it is. I was happy to pay when we were going, but not if I lose the money because he’s too dim to book the leave.