Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Finding picking hobbies with DD so difficult

20 replies

AnCaAnEm · 10/09/2025 15:33

So my DD is 5, she’s a very active, sporty child and gets a lot of joy out of being active. Currently she does swimming lessons and tennis lessons every week. When she was in nursery she did tots ballet too.

Before starting school (primary 1) a couple of weeks ago, we spoke about adding a 3rd activity and tried out a few in the summer holidays. Last week and this week she’s done trial days in a couple of other things.

We tried Ballet on Saturday - said she loved it
Rainbows - massive dislike she didn’t seem excited about going back so we have given up that space as she just spoke about her other activities instead.
Gymnastics - Enjoyed
Ice Skating - Loved

Now we are stuck as all 3 run at the same time on Saturdays near us and even if they didn’t we wouldn’t want to do more than 1 more sport as I’m already aware it’s a lot at 5.

DD can’t pick she loves Ice Skating and Ballet, less sold on gymnastics itself but likes that her friends go to this. She doesn’t want to give up tennis, she enjoys this and is actually normally asking to play more not less. Now we are stuck, we have explained she can only do one of Gymnastics, Ballet or Ice Skating, she can’t pick and neither can DH or I. We have mentally ruled out gymnastics as she seems slightly less fussed by it than the others.
DH thinks ballet is our best choice, I’m leaning towards Ice Skating.
Obviously nothing has to be forever but we do have a rule that if you go back after the trial session you have to stay until the end of term (obviously we’d adjust if she was totally miserable).

AIBU to find this so difficult? What would you pick for your child?

OP posts:
saveforthat · 10/09/2025 15:35

You need to let her pick and if she can't pick don't add in another activity. Personally I think that's too much for a 5 year old.

5foot5 · 10/09/2025 15:36

I would pick the ballet as it's easier to practice that between lessons in her own home

Original poster
AnCaAnEm · 10/09/2025 15:37

saveforthat · 10/09/2025 15:35

You need to let her pick and if she can't pick don't add in another activity. Personally I think that's too much for a 5 year old.

She wants to do another activity though and obviously if it seems to much we would get rid of one. The issue isn’t that she doesn’t want to do one it’s that she wants to do them all!

OP posts:
cestlavielife · 10/09/2025 15:40

Well she chooses or you put them in a hat and she draws one out. And that is this term activity.
If when she draws one she is disappointed then chuck that one and choose between the other two

It s not too hard as she can trial all of them over next two years

Ilovelurchers · 10/09/2025 15:42

I feel really hesitant about ballet as it can be associated with quite unhealthy/negative attitudes towards weight and the female form, though I have heard from friends whose daughters pursue it that some ballet schools are becoming increasingly exclusive to combat these stereotypes.

I do feel you dd has rather a lot of, as school is likely to tire her out so much this year too. Was there a particular reason you wanted to add another hobby? Was it driven by her, or you?

Funnily enough, out of any of these I would have picked Rainbows as it is the most chill, relaxing and varied (it was about the only hobby dd stuck with, and is still going at 13.) But then, I clearly am not your daughter!

Sorry can't help more - it's such a personal choice I guess.

Maybe go by cost/closeness of venue?

Original poster
AnCaAnEm · 10/09/2025 15:45

Ilovelurchers · 10/09/2025 15:42

I feel really hesitant about ballet as it can be associated with quite unhealthy/negative attitudes towards weight and the female form, though I have heard from friends whose daughters pursue it that some ballet schools are becoming increasingly exclusive to combat these stereotypes.

I do feel you dd has rather a lot of, as school is likely to tire her out so much this year too. Was there a particular reason you wanted to add another hobby? Was it driven by her, or you?

Funnily enough, out of any of these I would have picked Rainbows as it is the most chill, relaxing and varied (it was about the only hobby dd stuck with, and is still going at 13.) But then, I clearly am not your daughter!

Sorry can't help more - it's such a personal choice I guess.

Maybe go by cost/closeness of venue?

We find Saturdays quite long and a few of her friends have Saturday morning activities which is why she tried gymnastics etc. She is excited about another activity. I don’t know if it’s just DD but while other parents are telling me their primary ones are getting home and falling asleep, DD is out in the garden on the trampoline, on her bike etc. she always has so much energy!

OP posts:
ArghhWhatNext · 10/09/2025 15:49

I wouldn’t pick. I’d tell her that only one is possible. She needs to choose it, but when she’s chosen she will stick with it for a full term (or whatever).

SophieFTM887 · 10/09/2025 15:54

Ballet is easier to practice at home and there will be plenty of other studios if you move house or she doesn't like the school anymore.

Ice skating is pretty niche although sounds fun and very good exercise.

Maybe draw out of a hat as someone else suggested. See her reaction.

PaddingtonBlah · 10/09/2025 15:54

We actually dropped stuff when they started school for a bit as they were just so tired and needed quiet evenings.

I personally have always encouraged the uniformed activity alongside sports etc as it really adds a different set of skills and experiences. Mine have done beavers/rainbows/cubs/brownies/scouts/guides all the way through and without them wouldn't have had so many excellent and exciting experiences/camps etc.

Smartiepants79 · 10/09/2025 16:01

Ice skating is an expensive hobby if you really get into it.
I would go for the dance myself.

ToTheStarsToTheSea · 10/09/2025 16:02

AnCaAnEm · 10/09/2025 15:45

We find Saturdays quite long and a few of her friends have Saturday morning activities which is why she tried gymnastics etc. She is excited about another activity. I don’t know if it’s just DD but while other parents are telling me their primary ones are getting home and falling asleep, DD is out in the garden on the trampoline, on her bike etc. she always has so much energy!

Show quote history

This was/is my DD too. She's never tired! She's always done multiple clubs (her choice) and on non-club nights she's running around the garden or we go swimming or to the park or something.

FWIW I would go for ice skating. With ballet I'd be concerned about the body image issues mentioned by a PP. And as you said, she wasn't quite so into gymnastics.

Ice skating could lead to figure skating or ice hockey. It's also a fun activity that, even if she doesn't pursue it formally long term, she can always do with family or with friends as she gets older.

TravelPanic · 10/09/2025 16:07

We have similar issues with our 5 yr old DS! He wants to do everything! We picked the one that worked best with our schedule / logistics and said he can switch after a term if he wants to.

SophieFTM887 · 10/09/2025 16:07

PaddingtonBlah · 10/09/2025 15:54

We actually dropped stuff when they started school for a bit as they were just so tired and needed quiet evenings.

I personally have always encouraged the uniformed activity alongside sports etc as it really adds a different set of skills and experiences. Mine have done beavers/rainbows/cubs/brownies/scouts/guides all the way through and without them wouldn't have had so many excellent and exciting experiences/camps etc.

I have to say, I can this poster's point on the "uniformed" activities. They learn a lot more from activities like Beavers, are likely to make some good friends there too and it's more of a long game. It's probably not as exciting as ice skating but I would maybe try this again.

Hankunamatata · 10/09/2025 16:11

https://www.britishcycling.org.uk/getintobmx
Bmx racing. Awesome for young kids. Loads of tracks about where you can borrow bikes and kit

Blinkingmarvellous · 10/09/2025 16:17

Which is the shortest journey from home? Which has the best cafe nearby for parents to enjoy during the activity?!

Ablondiebutagoody · 10/09/2025 16:25

I would add gymnastics to what she already does

Octavia64 · 10/09/2025 16:29

I’d choose the cheaper one.

i had a DD like this she had so much energy. Did so many clubs in primary!

Confused3456 · 10/09/2025 16:52

As a fan of figure skating (Watching not doing), I would obviously say skating!

Another thing to bear in mind is skating is not an easily accessible sport in that there are not many rinks/ classes etc and it’s quite expensive. Ballet however is very accessible (not sure about gymnastics) so you could easily find another nearby ballet school that would offer a class with a time that suits, but that is not the case with skating.

In my view if the expense of skating doesn’t bother you, then do that sport and find another ballet class that fits in time wise and do that too.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page