What the hell is wrong with me

[Zoono]

I struggle to build relationships, can't budget and despite having a lot of initial enthusiasm for work or study, I end up completely burning out and having to quit within a year. I can achieve good results in work and academically but only in the short term. I'm in my early 30s and single parenting a toddler. I don't feel like a good role model and can't understand why I don't function like most other adults my age. My daughter is doing fantastic with her milestones and is perfect. I just wish she had a better mum to grow up with.

I'm glad my thread has helped you too. Also grateful to everyone who messaged, as I do feel a bit less alone. Will try to make a drs appointment next week. I'm trying to study for an intensive level 3 nail technician qualification but the demands of course are starting to break me. For example, treatments are assessed mainly on the length of time taken to complete them and my brain and my physical movements simply aren't quick enough. I can do the routines and the paperwork on the course isn't an issue but my timing really is. I think without support, working will be hard, if not impossible in the long run. Life must get better than this.

If you're doing the course through a college then you may be able to access support - most higher education institutions will be used to encountering students with undiagnosed learning difficulties or neurodivergence.

Was gonna say the same

Don't discount autism, often there's a big overlap between autism and ADHD symptoms in women and one can easily be mistaken for the other. Autism presents very differently in females compared to the male stereotype. Symptoms often include social issues, burnout, hyper fixation on narrow subjects but focus and concentration are also affected which is why interests get dropped easily.

You don’t sound stupid to me OP.

To the contrary you sound really insightful about what’s going on for you. You’re being honest that something is going on, and you’re getting help. That’s what smart people do.

Sending love

I’m autistic I struggle massively with friendships, I either mask and people love me but it’s trying prending to be something I’m not or I’m weird. I can budget but I have to write a down and check it regularly to stay on track. I’ve found a budget app that helps.
I was exactly the same with jobs, I’d go in love it and give 150% which is not sustainable I’d end up either hating the job and look for something else, performing poorly and getting sacked or ending up ill (physically or mentally) and leaving the role.

When I started my last job I was super conscious of this and tried to pace my self, touch wood it seems to have worked and I have been there almost 5 years. . It is only part time though which I think helps.

The speed of changing nappies implies dyspraxia may be the cause, which can also accompany ADHD or autism.

Please seek a diagnosis. My son has dyspraxia, he felt he was stupid and once diagnosed his self esteem got better.

ADHD can be treated too. Please seek help, you don’t want to feel like this.

Yes it's very important to pace yourself or you burn out. Congratulations for finding a strategy that works..