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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Given detention for lateness on tube strike day

484 replies

Longingdreamer · 09/09/2025 15:18

My child was given a detention today, despite there being a tube strike in London, which has caused travel chaos. They early but were apparently still late: roads are almost at a standstill it seems.

They get very upset by detentions, due to underlying neuro diversity.

Aibu to think that the school shouldn't give these on a strike day for minor lateness?

They usually give them, even if a child is only 1 minute late, but it seems wicked when it is out of their control.

OP posts:
Needmorelego · 09/09/2025 20:17

Morethanthis71 · 09/09/2025 19:58

Our school never gives a detention if you phone in and say the child is going to be late; can you call in and ask for them to be excused?

The problem with this is that many schools now are banning phones.
The OPs child set off for school earlier than usual but still didn't make it on time.
Now obviously I don't know the rules for phones for that particular school or whether the child even has a phone but this is one of the reasons why many parents don't actually want phones completely banned in schools.
The OP wouldn't have been able to phone in to report her child running late because as far as the OP knew her child left home with "plenty" of time.
The child themselves wouldn't have even been able to contact the school to explain the situation.
This is why children still need their phones.

saraclara · 09/09/2025 20:18

The fair thing would've been for you to give the school a heads up

I'm going to have a wild guess that the school staff knew about the strike, and didn't need a 'heads up' @ProudCat

jay55 · 09/09/2025 20:19

School have been crazy. Do they really want exhausted kids who have got up hours earlier than usual to get in? A bit of grace during a difficult time would be reasonable. During previous strikes I’ve seen grown men push school kids out the way to get on buses.

Chompingatthebeat · 09/09/2025 20:23

Bluebootsgreenboots · 09/09/2025 17:30

There is no way that these 'bike lanes' make it safe to cycle in London - vans park in them, buses have stops in them, crazy lime bikers left, right and centre, not to mention drivers taking no notice of them. You have to have your wits about you. Absolutely not safe on most routes for young teenagers who are still developing spacial awareness, even on a regular rush hour, let alone this week which has been the worst I've seen in decades
Even if you do get through all that and make it to school in one piece, many schools have a no cycling policy, partly to keep the kids safe, and partly because bike theft is so prevalent and the schools don't want more responsibility.

Yesterday we allowed 2 hours for a journey that we usually allow 20 minutes for. We were still late! A 6 minute tube ride became a bus ride (normally 15 mins, 25 mins in rush hour, became 50 minutes), then a short train ride with trains going every 15 minutes - but every other train was cancelled, so that made trains every 30 minutes. There were so many people that the station supervisors were having to stop people from going to the platform.
Londoners just accept that people do their best on strike days, sometimes you can be lucky and find a sneaky route, and sometimes you're fucked and you just have to be patient and wait it out.
My DS was quite stressed about the new journey yesterday. I didn't join him on the train. He'd been told no late marks during the strike, so at least he didn't have that to worry about.

Show quote history

There are over a million bicycle journeys made in london every day, can't be all bad

Just3ok · 09/09/2025 20:24

Chompingatthebeat · 09/09/2025 20:23

There are over a million bicycle journeys made in london every day, can't be all bad

Show quote history

Not a chance I’d send my child on a bike in London on a strike day especially if they weren’t very experienced on doing so

RosesAndHellebores · 09/09/2025 20:28

TartanBarmy · 09/09/2025 15:20

It was public knowledge there were tube strikes. Your DC should have left earlier to be at school
on time. School is practice for work. Imagine if surgeons just rolled in late because of a tube strike. Punctuality is important.

My boss left early on Monday. They then had to walk from north to south London. Leaving early doesn't always work.

I don't think any of us have to imagine what happens when surgeons turn in late for work. Medics don't all the time. Timekeeping in the NHS is atrocious.

AffableApple · 09/09/2025 20:44

HowamIgoingtocope · 09/09/2025 19:39

Twll me you have no idea how schools work with neurodiverse kids without telling me.

Yes it's school dependant. But fro. Experience. Schools don't give a toss if ita because of disability

Show quote history

I'm sorry my comment upset you. You're right, I have no experience of how schools work with ND kids.

I have plenty of experience, some personal, of the application of the Equality Act 2010 on disability in the workplace.

I'm really saddened that kids are being let down by the law, and I'm sorry for your experience.

LindorDoubleChoc · 09/09/2025 20:49

Yanbu. Of course the stupid school shouldn't have given detentions (not sure what your child's neuro diversity has to do with anything).

Anyone who said YABU on this thread is just being contrary or an arsehole.

Neemie · 09/09/2025 21:08

It seems rather mean of them especially when you see the queues of school children trying to get onto buses. It is a pig to get round London at the moment. My DS’s school isn’t giving sanctions for lateness this week. They have just said that they would rather they were in and late than not in at all.

DdraigGoch · 09/09/2025 21:21

Deepbluesea1 · 09/09/2025 16:01

presumably they had a car?

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I doubt it, London was gridlocked. The only people getting anywhere on time were those on bicycles.

DdraigGoch · 09/09/2025 21:25

Chompingatthebeat · 09/09/2025 17:12

Central london has lots of bike lanes

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Until you enter Kensington & Chelsea where the borough council are idiots.

Franjipanl8r · 09/09/2025 21:26

That’s bonkers. Loads of stuff in London’s been cancelled and people have been late to work as a result. I’d kick up a massive fuss about this.

swingingbytheseat · 09/09/2025 21:29

This sounds ridiculously rigid of the school, they need to get in touch with reality. Unless you cycle or skateboard you won’t get anywhere on a strike day

Pherian · 09/09/2025 21:30

Longingdreamer · 09/09/2025 15:18

My child was given a detention today, despite there being a tube strike in London, which has caused travel chaos. They early but were apparently still late: roads are almost at a standstill it seems.

They get very upset by detentions, due to underlying neuro diversity.

Aibu to think that the school shouldn't give these on a strike day for minor lateness?

They usually give them, even if a child is only 1 minute late, but it seems wicked when it is out of their control.

My employer cancelled my travel to London due to all this. I cannot see how the school expects you to get there on time - if the transport is late.

AnotherSuperHeroe · 09/09/2025 22:43

I would be writing to the school and making it very clear that I (as a parent) do not accept detention for my child due to the extenuating circumstances and she will not be attending. As they have to give notice, I would be collecting her at the school’s finishing time when the detention is set.

ManteesRock · 09/09/2025 22:47

Imagine if teachers just rocked up late because of a tube strike and your little darlings were left waiting outside for them....

Your son was late, late is late strike or not!

Ruby1985 · 09/09/2025 22:49

Eloeeze · 09/09/2025 15:19

Wicked?

Yes very, in case you are unable to read!

Schoolchoicesucks · 09/09/2025 23:08

The craziness of cyclists in central London today has been on the news - it's been absolutely carnage out there and definitely not something recommended for a novice teenage cyclist with a dodgy knee.

School are unreasonable giving out a detention to a kid being 5 minutes late due to the tube strike.

But agree with the PP to work on de-escalating the status of detentions with your DC. Even if the school did back down on this occasion it's likely that your child will get another for some other (petty) reason.

Needmorelego · 09/09/2025 23:27

ManteesRock · 09/09/2025 22:47

Imagine if teachers just rocked up late because of a tube strike and your little darlings were left waiting outside for them....

Your son was late, late is late strike or not!

In some schools the teachers were late.

ByCyanMoose · 10/09/2025 00:46

TartanBarmy · 09/09/2025 16:32

I know what London is line on Tube strike days - you just get up early and walk. DH was in London yesterday and walked everywhere! He did say the traffic was atrocious but it’s never exactly plain sailing there, even in bus lanes or taxis

I hate lateness, it is a personal bugbear of mine. And colleagues who are Gen Z genuinely cannot understand why people around them are annoyed when they come in every day 10 or 15 mins late. “Oh I’ll stay late and make it up” or “I’ll take a shorter lunch break”. You only have to come in two frigging days a week! Be on fucking time you useless lazy twats.

I know a surgeon who has just stayed in town rather than have her ops cancelled! So they meet their contractual obligations.

Obviously this is not so much about the OP’s child now but EVERYONE can get to work or school on time if they try hard enough. Everyone.
whether they can be arsed or not to make the effort is a different matter.

Many people hate lateness, in the casual sense. What you have going on is something a little more intense. I suggest you try to dial it back a little bit, for the sake of your own peace of mind and that of any employees/students you may be supervising.

zebrastripesarefun · 10/09/2025 05:19

Totally unfair to punish a child for lateness due to tube strike. Child left for school early. I would phone school. Many NHS staff were late too. Not everyone can stay in hotels or leave young children to go to work hours early. It’s inevitable people would be late. Punishing for the sake of punishing serves no purpose at all

Emailsshow · 10/09/2025 06:06

Longingdreamer · 09/09/2025 18:53

I think it is too rigid. This just leads to resentment from pupils (my daughter's friends have said the same). They do not consider fairness when applying their punishments.

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Why am I not surprised that the OP is generally unimpressed with the school.

Clearly this is just one issue in a long line of issues you have with the school.

so you think the school is “too rigid” and “doesn’t consider fairness when applying their punishments”.,, what about how you regard the school’s teaching and pastoral care @Longingdreamer ?

GagMeWithASpoon · 10/09/2025 06:58

ManteesRock · 09/09/2025 22:47

Imagine if teachers just rocked up late because of a tube strike and your little darlings were left waiting outside for them....

Your son was late, late is late strike or not!

DD’s teacher was late, by 2 hours, not 5 minutes. The world didn’t end.

Saltandpepperlife · 10/09/2025 07:02

ManteesRock · 09/09/2025 22:47

Imagine if teachers just rocked up late because of a tube strike and your little darlings were left waiting outside for them....

Your son was late, late is late strike or not!

Do teachers have some kind of special tunnel to the school then? Maybe they could let the kids use it as well so they could be on time. 🙄

As already mentioned there has been times when due to an accident/train strikes/roadworks that mine have been late for school. Teachers as well have been sat in the same traffic.

I had a dentist appointment the other day where the dentist was late due to major road works going on.

It’s not always possible to plan ahead and many have other commitments theirselves such as childcare where they can’t drop their kids off in the middle of the night so they can make it on time or at a school gate at 6am just so they can leave earlier.

No body is immune from it just because of their profession.

HowamIgoingtocope · 10/09/2025 07:09

AffableApple · 09/09/2025 20:44

I'm sorry my comment upset you. You're right, I have no experience of how schools work with ND kids.

I have plenty of experience, some personal, of the application of the Equality Act 2010 on disability in the workplace.

I'm really saddened that kids are being let down by the law, and I'm sorry for your experience.

Edited
Show quote history

Most nd kids are let down by schools. Workplace and schools are two different ball games. Im disabled so know my work generally looks after me to an extent. My kids however have been failed by the school system and only now my 17 year old is getting support in college.
Talk to any sen parent and you will find d out exactly what a fight for your child is like.