Covid in 2025

[zoeb92]

Hi all,

Long story short, my parents got back from holiday on Monday and both have Covid. Mum’s been unwell since Tuesday, Dad started feeling rough on Friday. Mum is better now.

They’re both retired, in their 60s, and usually look after my toddler two days a week while I’m at work.

They’re meant to be going to a funeral 150 miles away on Friday and, while there, also planning to visit elderly relatives.

I dropped tests over yesterday evening – Mum’s came back negative, Dad’s positive. I’d spent Saturday with Mum and, after feeling off last night, I tested again (negative the day before) and now I’m positive too.

I’ll be working from home until it clears – luckily that’s not an issue as my boss is lovely and very understanding.

Here’s the problem: Mum is determined to go to this funeral on Friday (it’s her friend’s partner who has passed, not a close relative). I’ve told Dad he needs to stay well away since he’s still testing positive. I’ve said he can travel down with Mum if he really wants, but he should let her attend alone, avoid staying overnight with Mum’s friend, and absolutely not go near my grandparents, who are in their 80s.

Mum insists I’m being dramatic – she says Covid is just like a cold now, and everyone’s vaccinated. I’m angry because I think she’s being selfish. Dad is listening to me (secretly relieved, I suspect, that he doesn’t have to go). What frustrates me most is that Mum is normally straight-laced, she never breaks rules or takes risks. She isn’t technically breaking any rules here, but in my opinion her attitude is irresponsible.

I’m 5 months pregnant and can’t take anything for the symptoms. Not only am I annoyed that I caught it from her in the first place, but I’m also worried she or Dad could spread it around like jam on toast and make a lot of people poorly.

AIBU? Thanks.

You both have points of view that are reasonable, however as all three of you are adults, each adult gets to make their own decision. The others get to offer their opinion only.

They are vaccinated yes, as am I. The vaccine doesn't prevent you getting it, it just lessens the symptoms to keep you out of hospital, but considering this is a new variant and I had my jab over 2 years ago, the protection of the vaccine might not be there now.

1. shitty you weren’t given a heads up esp as pregnant.
2. mum saying she’d go even if positive - shitty behaviour - kids are said by some to be the least affected group, yet 1,000 a week get long covid
3. we are in 2025, not 2019
4. why do some people give a shit if others test - why do you care so much
5. she’s unlikely to be contagious by Friday (if I’ve got timings right and it’s 12 days)
6. let others decide if they want her to visit - the relatives and those who will have to deal with the fallout if relatives get ill

Irrespective of the virus involved whether it's covid, flu, chicken pox, slapped cheek, etc etc you should stay away from other people if there's a chance you could pass it on.
Isn't that just common decency?

covid is really misunderstood and underestimated by some people. There is a whole spectrum of how it affects people. Some people barely know they have it, others die and everything inbetween. I personally was ill for at least 6 weeks with it last year having been positive for it in the first lockdown with barely any symptoms. I’d avoid spreading it loved ones if I knew I had it

Anyone with a nasty illness should stay away from others. Vaccines have largely worn off now. They prevent serious illness and death but don’t stop you catching it, being quite ill and getting long Covid which many healthy fit people are getting.

If your Mum is testing negative then she’s fine. Your Dad should test before mixing with elderly people.

I think we all hoped Covid would end up being like a cold. But each strain is different (I’ve had very mild ones before but the last strain was worse and I ended up with long Covid- zero health issues previously ). Latest strains are quite nasty. If we can do anything to stop spreading them around we should.

This is so true and it’s pretty indiscriminate - fit and healthy people can be affected differently each time.

The second time I had it I was just a bit tired for a week! That was all. I only tested as I work with older people. Third time - Long Covid for 9 months and counting. I used to run 25 miles a week…can barely exercise now.

People need to maybe rethink their views on it. No we don’t need to hide away but it can be very nasty and it’s constantly circulating all year round (unlike flu).

Absolutely this. It's not about it being COVID or a 'hysterical reaction' to it, it is just basic consideration not to pass on illnesses that are quite horrible and affect other people's lives if you are aware that you have it. (That also, re a PP's point, is quite different from just being out and about and potentially picking things up). It is why schools ask for kids to stay away for 24 hours after D and V, for example.

It's not about you living your life, it's about not knowingly sitting next to people in an enclosed space with a raging virus of any kind. Of course they are going to get it. And you don't know what consequences that will have on them, or their families, or their earnings, if they don't get sick pay. If I'm off work for a week, for example, as a single mum and sole provider, that really affects our lives. So thanks very much for knowingly sitting next to me for an hour or so with a contagious bug that will floor me, but as long as you're living life eh?

How about this as a compromise for anyone that thinks this is fine, go, but be fair to those sitting around you and let them know you are positive for COVID (or anything else you might have) in case they want to keep their distance and avoid the risk? If you wouldn't do that but would rather go and keep it a secret then that says it all really.

And yes, I have COVID right now, I'm fit and healthy and in my 40s and it's the worst thing I've had in a long long time.

My thoughts exactly.

Why did they test in the first place? Covid is just a cold to the vast majority of people and doesn’t need any special restrictions.

Immunocompromised people should take precautions of their own, as was always the case.

It's not a bloody cold. Tell her not to be so selfish. The 2 people I knew personally who died from COVID were last year, way after the big wave, both fully vaccinated non-smokers.

Probably - is not evidence.

Well said.

Look at ONS.
Yes people are still dying of Covid, more than they do from the flu.

Depending on how old people are, a lot won’t be vaccinated. It’s only over 75s who can get the winter booster this year and any immunity from the spring booster will be fading out by now.

I think OP has made it clear that she would prefer her elderly grandparents are not put at risk. Or anyone else who they come into contact with at the funeral, or those who they are staying with. It could however be that her father is no longer infected by the time they have to travel.

I’ve seen this justification before, but do you actually think it’s a good idea that some medical professionals go to work when they have covid? Is there not even a miniscule part of you that thinks deliberately spreading covid in healthcare is wrong?

I think it’s incredibly selfish to go anywhere with an infectious condition, be that covid, a cold, scabies, nits, gastroenteritis.

Having said that, here’s an excerpt from the weekly deaths stats from the ONS:

Percentage of deaths due to or involving selected causes, England and Wales, week ending Friday, 22 August 2025

Influenza or pneumonia
Due to ⬥
2.6% 263 deaths
Involving ●
11.2% 1,125 deaths

Coronavirus
Due to ⬥
0.3% 30 deaths
Involving ●
0.5% 52 deaths

www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/birthsdeathsandmarriages/deaths/articles/deathsregisteredweeklyinenglandandwales/2025-03-26/

My DD12 had Covid a couple weeks back. Missed her first week of high school. She was pretty poorly for a few days and still doesn’t have much of an appetite which is unusual. I made her stay in for a few days whilst her fever broke and she had a terrible cough so she stayed home until she was negative (still coughing) still seems to be suffering with her appetite and exhaustion. I never caught it surprisingly. She currently has a cold now 🤦🏻‍♀️ and had a 💩 bug last week. I though primary school was bad for bugs but high school seems to be worse xx

@MyDogHumpsThings its not just about deaths.

Some people, especially on here, breeze through covid and describe it easier than a cold, others can be extremely poorly without hospital admission, let alone dying. Some will take weeks or months to recover, others will end up with long covid, with some never fully recovering. It can reduce quality of life and in some cases ruin lives and subsequently destroy families. None of us know how we could be affected until we are hit with it. It’s also unknown as to what the long term implications are of multiple covid infections. None of which are reflected in death rates.

It’s not about deaths. It’s about the fact that it’s a nasty virus that can knock even healthy people out for weeks. In around 6-10% of all infections it is causing Long Covid. For some reason women aged 40-55 are more likely to be affected by this.

I know someone mentioned else mentioned the death rate. Yes flu is more deadly but flu circulates at specific times of the year and most people only get flu a few times in their lives. We build immunity. Covid is constantly circulating and we are not developing immunity - only against severe disease and death but not Long Covid or moderate illness.

That's what a lot of people choose to ignore: it manifests differently for different people regardless of age or level of health.
And the vaccines from 3 years ago don't necessarily have any positive impact by now.
Yes, we should all try and carry on as normal with our lives but not dismiss the fact that Covid can leave some people with long term issues.

@Branster and can affect the same person differently each time.

I struggle to assess the risk. Just buried a school mum friend, with dc the same ages as mine. She had an underlying issue but 5 years on it was still a shock to hear Covid took her.

I have two relatives whose lives have been utterly devastated by long covid. And another who developed heart complications from the first round of vaccines.

I know that I’m probably feeling it’s a higher risk than is statistically justified, but when it’s up close and personal it’s hard to ignore. Covid still gives me heebie jeebies

Do we really know what % of C19 infections lead to Long Covid, and do we know that know of the other "common cold" viruses (the ones we don't worry so much about passing on) don't have the same frequency of persistent symptoms after 4 weeks? I don't think we can know anything about other viruses, except flu, the studies haven't been done. Also, the frequency of LC might change in yrs to come, more mild variants, etc.

Symptoms > 4 wks is definition of LC used here.

Your mum is negative. Even at the height of 2020/21, people who were negative had fewer restrictions.

People just aren't that scared of Covid any more. For most of us (and I've had it at least twice), it is nothing more than a heavy cold. Your mother clearly is not scared of Covid, and seeing as SHE DOES NOT HAVE IT, there is no harm in her going about her business! Personally, I can't believe you even went and bought tests.