Finding my 1 year old exhausting

[SaladMum562]

Just that. By Sunday afternoon I am a total mess. About to collapse. I spent all day counting down the hours to bedtime yesterday. Actually collapsed on the sofa at 8pm after putting him to bed last night. Anyone else? Any tips?

He is SO ACTIVE. Climbing over everything. He starts running the second he opens his eyes (at 6.15am on the dot). We spend the whole weekend entertaining him. Feeding him. Running after him.

We only have the one kid so surely we shouldn't be this tired? Or is everyone the same?

He is currently cutting a tooth so not sleeping well at the moment either.

I also work full time so I feel like I'm running on fumes.

I have a colleague who's boy was born a week after mine and she's not finding it hard at all.....well, she does have family around the corner who come over all the time apparently (we have none, zero) and her boy is barely crawling and not walking so maybe that explains it. But we were chatting over coffee this morning about our kids and I left that conversation feeling quite ... incompetent. Like, I said being at work is SO MUCH EASIER (not more enjoyable, just easier) and I got dead silence in return.

Possibly not very PC these days but a wooden playpen might give you break and a safe space for baby to play in to give you a break from the chasing!

Or pop him in the highchair. Lots of toys/books/spoons to keep them busy.

We do have a massive playpen for him. It's great but he won't stay in it very long. Not since he's been walking.

It’s a tricky age because they can’t play on much at the play park or roam round the country park.
I always put mine in the push chair and took them for a walk everyday. The fresh air made us all feel better. Now I get them out for a walk or similar.
I won’t lie though I’ve been tired for 8 years. My eldest is 8!

I remember that ange and I was truly exhausted until my child was age about three. I would fall asleep on the sofa every night. I would then get 10 or more hours sleep. I think the thing is, you can’t even really have a cup of tea or relax for 10 minutes. I wish I’d had a playpen, and put him in front of the television with something to eat etc . I put pressure on myself to be perfect and I think I did myself a disservice over exerting every day.

It does get much easier the older they get. But you are not unreasonable to be very tired.

It's the phase of parenting everyone thinks is an exhausting nightmare at the time and of course it is. But it does pass.

However as they get older and you can't fix all their problems so easily you do look back on these knackering days with fond memories and think it wasn't all that hard.

The mental exhaustion and worry of a 9 year old constantly teased at school, coming home crying etc I'd take a wriggling toddler over that anyday.

Early bed and wine does help though
😉

One year olds are exhausting, i remember mine getting to the age of 2 and thinking thank god I can send them to pre-school 😂

Mine is also 1. Yes, definitely a very active age! I find it more manageable if I just plan the entire day around him. So rather than hoping he’ll play by himself / stay on his playmat for half an hour so that I can send a couple of emails (which worked so well when my little one was between 4-8 months old!) I put him in his pram after breakfast, take him on a walk while I have my morning coffee (to go), then we go to a playground, home for lunch, afternoon repeat, then dinner and bed time.

I empathise, my second is like this and if he’d been my first he would probably be an only. He gets up at 5am regardless of nap changes or how much I tire him out and I’m a SAHM so it’s seven days of trying to stop him throwing himself of everything and climbing everything in sight, I hope it will improve with time as most things do with children 😂

You’re not incompetent at all

My daughter is the same - she’s ten months but is high energy and only 1-2 naps a day. On the lower end for sleep in general

I meet up with other mums and their babies the same age can sit and be chill, mine is into absolutely everything - constantly. We are exhausted.

don’t have any answer just empathy!! We have no family or help nearby either

He won't be contained anymore. Totally refuses the pram. Tried forcing him in it thinking he'll get over it but he screamed for 20 minutes until we came home. No singing or toys or anything will do the trick.

Bought him a trike which he loves but only for 15 minutes max. Just wants to be out but he can't just walk. He falls over, picks up a rock, climbs into a bush etc. And he's a bit too small for most playgrounds.

Soft play is the answer but I can't do more than an hour or 2 there. I hate it 😅

Your experience will resonate with many OP and I feel for you. Very important to remember that it makes a HUGE difference if you have family nearby to support so try not to compare to your friend

Thank you! He's a VERY HAPPY baby. Extremely happy. Just unbelievable high energy. His ideal totaly sleep time in 24 hours is 12 hours. 10.5 hours overnight, 1 hour mid morning and 20-30 mins afternoon. That's it. And then he wakes and off he goes 😂

The early wakes are brutal.

I did just persist with the buggy often resorting to a bag of crisps or similar. Sometimes you have to persist for a few goes with the buggy but I do realise if he’s at nursery and free range during the week it makes it harder for you at the weekends. Mine weren’t at nursery at that age.
We used have a car picnic in a local car park next to the railway line to watch the trains. Local farm parks to look at the animals, feed the ducks at a nearby pond
Does he like sitting in the supermarket trolley helping? Local garden centre? Christmas displays will be going up soon. Any local museums? We have quite a few where one admission price gets you in for the year

Normal

Honestly we've said it so many times: "wish my mum could take him for a couple of hours on a Sunday morning".

I think we'd be much happier humans if we got that. Unfortunately both mum and MIL have passed away, they would have been the best grandmas. My dad's gone too and my FIL is busy living his midlife crisis. His kids barely hear from him, we just see Instagram photos of his new girlfriends every few months. He's seen his first and so far only grandchild ONCE in 14 months. When he was younger he was such a hands on dad, he was all about family but has done a 180 since his late 50s.

I’ve been through this twice (second is 23 months old). They’re absolutely fucking terrorists and it’s exhausting. It’s not you being incompetent. Hopefully you’re in for an easier phase soon. You never know, your friend might find their next stage harder!