Would this annoy you? Nosy neighbour?

[snickersknickerslol]

I just find my neighbour so nosy to the point that I hate talking to her.

What really put me off was when she pointed out “Oh your brother has been visiting?” and wanted to know who it was and obviously was waiting for an explanation.

Another time she was telling me how irresponsible my other neighbour was for letting her cat get killed by a car - despite her never even having a convo with my neighbour, she knew all this from watching/listening on her Ringdoor to people conversations.

I just find her too intrusive.

AIBU or would this annoy anyone else as well?

I just say hello and that’s it now and cut any attempts at a convo.

YANBU. I have a neighbour like this, who watches what I'm doing out of her window then likes to comment on what I was doing. I find it really odd and try to avoid speaking to her. I think she's possibly lonely and trying to make conversation, but I've let her know I don't like being watched, yet she still continues to make comments where she admits she was watching me. It's strange and quite unnerving.

@hididdlyhoyes this is how exactly how I feel.
DH has said she thinks she is lonely as well, I am a private person and like my privacy.

Just tell her different things every time.

‘No, that wasn’t my brother, that’s the younger of my two lovers.’

‘It only looked like the cat was killed by a car — it was killed by a poison dart launched from behind the hedge of Number Six.’

Some people have very, very small and tediously boring lives.

They'd be better if they discovered TV soap operas - at least they're specifically designed for you to follow, ponder on and discuss with others, without compromising the privacy or wishes of any actual real-life people.

My neighbour was like this and would interrupt us getting in and out of our cars to ask questions. We thought she was lonely and suggested that she join in with our other neighbours who were retired and met up and often caught buses to local areas, but she didn't want to go outside the area or even into their homes. She now has dementia and has support at home and still repeatedly asks questions when we see her but she's slow to get out so it's rare now.
Some people aren't lonely, they do just like to be nosy and to gossip.
I come onto MN for that and leave my neighbours alone 😂

Yes we have next door neighbours like this and gotten worse since they retired. We cannot get inside our front door without a full blown conversation and intrusive questions. My adult daughter visiting and gets asked about her love life and when she is getting married? They are also over sharers and if we don't get told everything in person then we get told in a round robin text message! We never reply meaning we are not interested, yet they still send all this messages detailing every aspect of their life. We are looking to move because of it.

I know people like this. Don’t give her anything. Or conversely give her something wild and outrageous to really blow her mind.

It’s frustrating but helpful to remember that these people are usually lonely and bored. As long as she isn’t causing problems for you then try to approach with sympathy.

Hi MIL! 👋 I didn't realise you were on Mumsnet?

Yes, MIL is like this. I once caught her hovering outside our ajar side door (clearly listening for tit bits ) and jumped out of her skin when I opened it up !

I think it boils down to lack of a life. Their lives are boring and empty so they need to fill it with the goings on of other people's lives.

Act bored , non committal and disinterested when the neighbour starts gossiping. "Oh right" will do and a change of subject. I'd generally avoid and keep it to cheery waves and 'good morning's ' whilst walking at an "I'm in a rush" pace

Id have fun & make up stories, “no that wasnt my brother, it was me & my husbands lover we opened up our relationship.” She will soon stop!

If you're not especially bothered about being friendly with her, you can always just outright tell her to mind her own business. I snapped after 10 years of my neighbour critiquing my hedge cutting technique/maintenance 😆. Literally every time I went out there she had to comment for the sake of saying something. I told her I wasn't wasting my day off work having her try to start yet another inane conversation with me about a hedge. Left it half done and we haven't spoken since (it's been bliss). Now she bothers my DH about all this pointless shit instead!

Some people are just naturally nosy.

I have a relative like this. She’s an old lady now but she was always like this. Even when she was a young working mum.

She doesn’t do it because she’s bored and lonely. She does it because she enjoys it.

She finds it weird that I’m not doing the same and am generally ignorant about what goes on in
my street.

Horses for courses.

My SIL has a neighbour like this. She comes over early evening just to say 'hi' and proceeds with 'I noticed your car was gone all day. Where did you go? ... Oh, work? But you usually get back at 5pm and it was gone til 6:30pm so I just thought it odd.'

Madness.

@Lou670 yes my neighbour is exactly like this.

She will go on and on about her ex, her problems and we are not interested.

We would ideally like to move as well as we just feel as if we are always being watched.

Love my neighbours and the community we live in. When we moved here we were the youngsters with toddlers. Around us we had friends in similar circumstances, couples with older children/babysitters, empty nesters, elderly, single people, sane sex couples

Ha - sane sex couples covers a lot! We’ve all moved up a generation and we’re now supporting the elderly neighbours, who want to talk and want company. Happy to do that. We’ll be the elderly couple one day.

My neighbours are the best thing about living in our house. We try to give each other privacy but we all help each other out so much its impossible.

But if you don’t want to chat, just say hi and carry on about your day.

The neighbour is in her 20s, I didn’t mind talking to her but it’s her intrusiveness and questions that have put me off.

DH dosent like it either.
We never comment on her visitors or ask her personal questions about her life.

We will just say hello and leave her too it as we don’t want to be encouraging her.

Haha our neighbour is like this. They're lovely but the husband is quite nosey.

I take it as a positive- we will never be burgled as nothing gets past him! 😂

Oh see this would annoy me a bit actually. I tolerate it with my neighbours as they're old.

I don't think i would like someone younger than me constantly questioning and poking their nose in my business.

I like the suggestions to make up stories to her about lovers etc!

My neighbour has threatened to sue my cat. I'm awaiting the letter with interest.

Pahahaha that made me laugh! People are mad sometimes aren't they?!

Yes they are @NavyNorris , Dcat doesn't even get pocket money.

I have a neighbour like this. I don't think she's lonely because she's happily married and has teenage children still living at home. She literally stands behind her net curtains watching people come and go and then tittle-tattles to anyone who'll listen. It's very intrusive and because there's very little to tell, it's also boring. I use to stop and speak to her hoping for a normal conversation but she always changed the subject back to mindless gossip. Now I just avoid her.