Was childhood it better back in the day or was it insanely dangerous?

[FleetFootedJanet]

I grew up in the 80s. My group of friends were the boys and girls who lived on our street and surrounding street. We went out for hours, with those friends with no adult supervision, and played in the streets or gardens. We also, when slightly older, went further afield.

I distinctly remember one occasion when we played on a building site close to our house, when they were building an extension to the estate where we lived. We also used to “sail” on the old canal using whatever we could find, and played on a bit of disused land next to an old car park.

I don’t know, but I sense that kids don’t do stuff like that now. DD is quite young but the idea she’d play in the canal or on a building site seems mad, even though I did it and have fond memories of exploring and doing all that stuff. I’m still friends with a good proportion of those kids who I played with back then.

So was it better? Or was it insanely dangerous, and I’m lucky to have made it to adulthood? Did it give us something kids now don’t have - are they missing out? Or am I just getting old and nostalgic?

Where I live in Scotland children still go out to play so my kids have much the same childhood that I did. there’s quite a difference between Scottish and English culture in this.

generally it’s just as safe as always but some adults and some cultures have become insanely risk averse.

My kids are more at risk now that they are teens with phones and social media from online bullying than they ever were just going out to play and explore

I loved playing on the valley with my friends, picking ladybirds and releasing them back.

We live at the back of our school and in them days the school yards had no secure school fencing like they do now. Me and my friends would go in the school yard in the holidays and play rounders and football.

I loved the freedom of riding my raleigh bike all over, being sent to sainburys on my bike to get some potatoes or milk or whatever was needed.

I'd hate to be a child now. There's nowhere for them to play, everything has been built on or the school yards and playing fields are all fenced off with 10ft high fencing.

The roads are much more dangerous with the amount of cars.

I remember someone pretty much incinerating their hand playing with fireworks.

Someone else I knew at work wore an eyepatch because of experimentation when they were a kid.

So childhood accidents that were lifechanging did happen then. I suppose the question is whether as many happen now, and hundreds of anecdotals don't really count. What counts is the stats.

I do remember getting the standard education "Apache" but I can't remember how old I was. Maybe 12-14.

This was a movie about a group of kids that succumbed to horrible accidents playing in dangerous places and I guess was supposed to scare the life out of you if you were considering playing around where you shouldn't.

I lived in a zone 4 London suburb in the late 80s/early 90s and also had a “free range” childhood. No fields or hay bales but a dodgy park and a little stream! All the kids used to head to the park - aged around 6-14. The older ones were expected to look out for the younger ones. There were a few broken bones from falling out of trees/ crashing bikes while doing “stunts”, “gymnastics” routines that went wrong. But nobody seemed to mind and we were always excited to sign the cast.

we’d all “knock for” each other too. No parents involved or phone calls to check it was ok. Just walk down your road and the next couple and knock any houses with kids roughly your age and ask if they wanted to play out. We all knew we had to be back “for tea” and that was it.

we also used to jump over the hedge/fence from the park into people’s back gardens if we kicked a ball over. You soon learnt which houses you had to avoid doing that with!

major downside of that era for me was not being believed / being told off for “being rude” if you tried to tell someone about creepy adults. Meant the creeps got away with it for ages. Now kids are listened to.

Totally agree. 80s child here, I feared the reaction of adults and did not expect them to listen to or respect me. I was flashed and followed in separate incidents as a teen. I did not consider telling an adult as I didn’t expect to be believed. A teacher at my primary school abused girls for years and even after he was sentenced, many adults did not believe the girls. This was normal. Safeguarding of today is so much better ( it didn’t really exist in my childhood) .

DH was born the year after WW2 ended and always says he had an idyllic childhood. Due to the 'baby boom' there were lots of other kids in practically every other house in the street and they all played out together or in each other's gardens. They went to the local woods and climbed trees etc, rode bikes, built dens and so on. As an adult he has always been able to turn his hand to most practical tasks which I think probably has its roots in all the den building, go-kart building etc from his childhood. They also did some pretty dangerous/stupid things that I always tell him if he had done them a generation later would have got him an ASBO! I think one of my favourite memories is of sitting chatting with the very elderly mother of one of his old childhood friends and her telling me how well behaved her boys were, not like the 'youth of today' , whilst on the other side of the room I could hear DH, his friend and friend's brothers laughing about their childhood exploits (of which she was obviously completely oblivious!)

Time different. I grew up in west Cornwall in the 1960s. From age 6 or 7, we roamed free. We learnt how to judge risk and safety. I spent 2 hours sat on top of a hedge at 8 with my friend and her youngish puppy waiting until the sows in the field got bored enough to go away and leave us alone. Nobody was hurt, but we were very late home that day.

I think it was probably both - better because it was (sometimes) dangerous. My husband and his mate used to make their own gunpowder in their bedrooms..... until eventually they were banned by parents after setting fire to the carpet one too many times. I suppose they were about 10 or 11. But it's still a very fond memory for him decades later, and really educational for two lads who loved science 😂

I think it was a lot more dangerous. Maybe it was better for those of us who weren’t killed, injured, assaulted, abused or abducted, but I think it’s easy to look back with rose-tinted spectacles.

I grew up in northern Scotland in the 90s and 00s and we used to roam all around our local area, mostly via bike, sometimes horse 😂 (we had ponies). But used to ride unsupervised, often no helmet and bare feet/not dressed for riding. We often cycled with no helmet. We swam in the river, explored for miles in nearby forests and moorland, it was amazing. If we lived there, id want the same for my kids but it's different in England I feel. Especially southern England or busier areas.

ETA I think it's difficult to compare or judge. I think kids need freedom and the chance to guage risks by themselves. I'm not sure the average child / teen gets enough of that. But I think we live in a more risk aware culture now and as a result, many parents think the risks aren't worth it (and maybe they're not, I can't say either way)

Yes - whenever I get a bit misty-eyed with nostalgia, I remember Jimmy Saville. At least 450 victims aged from 5 to 75. Likely many many more. Committed his crimes in hospitals and schools, amongst other places. And we didn’t find out until he died in 2011.

70s rural Irish childhood on a council estate in a village. Adults were busy working but we did look after each other. Gangs of kids look out for each other. Mothers on doorsteps, with fag's had an eye out too. We were all independent at 18, left home, worked etc.

We were able to navigate the world in a way l can't imagine 18 year olds do now. Able to get on with it. Parenting was very shared then, everyone including the older kids kept an eye out.

I'm a teacher and most of the 16/17 years l teach seem totally unequipped for 'real' life. Think someone is going to solve everything. Normal concerns are clouded in the language of mental health. They can't seem to defend on their peers. Huge pressure on parents.

I think there are plenty of places for children to play; I’ve spent the summer with my children at the beach, in the woods, exploring ponds and rivers and going to parks.

But I have been with them, as I’d expect (they are very young)

I remember in the 80s walking to school alone and letting myself into an empty house after school from being in what is now year 3 onwards and I didn’t like it. Also remember a lot of upsetting things happening when adults weren’t supervising. Children can quickly get a bit of a pack mentality without guidance.

Both better and worse. I had aot of freedom & didn't think twice about roaming with the kids in the (rural) street, even at night. I couldn't comprehend my friend in town asking permission to go to the shop 200m away & getting a lecture on safety & come right back, no stopping!

However, my freedom was from disengaged parents. I have an abundance of bad memories & was sexually assaulted many times, as I had no guidance, support or idea of how to protect myself. I never divulged because it would have been pushed under the carpet or made out to be my fault as it would have been inconvenient. DB became involved in drugs & illegal activities. Plus both drinking, DB driving unlicensed etc. It's surprising we both came out alive, let alone learn to be functioning adults. It's why we're so restrictive on our own DC.

My DM admits 'it never crossed her mind ' to know where we were or actively parent us. I think she has realised, after seeing how engaged DB & I are with our DC, that they were wrong in how they parented. I occasionally let something we did slip & she's horrified.

My DC might be more restricted but they have more opportunities, parents they can bring anything to, and hopefully won't have the horrific experiences we had.

It was both better and insanely dangerous.

We once ran across 4 lanes of motor way as a short to the reservoir where we played… 😳

Agree I think there's a different attitude to this in Scotland.

My kids do still jump off hay bales, play in the woods unsupervised, go guising without adults from age 10. We've only had one broken bone so far touch wood and that happened in the house!

Sometimes I do feel nervous about them but that kind of freedom is so good for them, the way they're forced to negotiate with each other, look out for each other, etc.

I am glad I grew up without mobiles, but I’m also glad my children have better child protection around them, that they don’t drink or smoke like we did and that we make sure they are safer. My uncle was a farmer, my cousin and I would play in the grain store, the adults were oblivious, we were out of their hair, so incredibly dangerous and we had no idea - possibly my cousin did, but I had no idea how dangerous a farm was, yet completely free to roam.

We were all smoking by about 12. Sent off to various residential trips with no safeguarding checks. My parents were fine with me drinking from 15 (I had a job, so was considered pretty much adult) I was in clubs by 16. Knew a couple of girls with drink problems by then, spent a lot of time in my mid teens with lads in their 20s, who thankfully were fairly decent but definitely could have groomed us if they were that way inclined. And obviously there was no one who was gay at my school - homophobia was quite violent. I don’t think it was better on balance.

Insanely dangerous but so much fun!

Between the ages of 4 and 9 I:

• played armies on a neglected building site - we built walls and threw bricks at each other
• was given piggy backs on brothers and neighbours bikes going fast downhill on residential streets
• hitched lifts from strangers with my mates into town and back again - whilst there made prank calls from phone boxes
• set fire to a phone box
• walked to school alone from the age of 6 (everyone did this though so it was busy)
• went in and out of dozens of friends houses and no-one ever knew where any of us were and parents did not know any other parents
• played on cliff edges and clambered around cliff fall areas completely unsupervised and a mile from home
• taunted the local flashers (there was one up in the window of the cul-de-sac down our road (we threw stones at his windows), and one who hung around the primary school railing and would play a 'try and grab us' game if we went near the edges of the playground. We called him awful names.
• played out till dark and often missed meals as we were so far from home

I am lucky nothing ever happened to me except a few minor injuries and the odd stitches.

It was soooooooooo much fun.

My childhood was in the 70s/80s, and I would tend to say better. While there were some injuries among kids in my neighbourhood, none were serious/life threatening. And I think the kids were far more competent, empowered, capable of living in the world, and healthier, than kids are now.

I think a lot of the current problems kids are having with anxiety and fear of being self-sufficient and starting life as adults stems from how sheltered they are.

I was a child of the 70s and we'd go out all day like OP. Play in the woods, down by the river, we were expressly told not to cross the railway line.

Walked to school from age 8. Cycled everywhere. My dc didn't do any of that, just didn't seem as interested in being independent.

A couple of kids did drown in the river. And there were car accidents, but you could as easily have that nowadays.

It was far more dangerous, but everyone here lived to tell the tale so we are biased. There were three children at my school who died in accidents. Another had a serious injury jumping from a hay bale. Lots of sexual activity in under 16s and grooming from men aged 19-25 towards 15-17 year old girls. Teenage pregnancy. Lots of underage drinking to the point of hospitalisation/not knowing where you are. Also drug taking among under 14s. Teachers could be pretty nasty and rarely listened to any concerns a child might have, they largely just taught their subject and that was that. Open hostility towards people who didn’t fit in, police brutality. Safeguarding means a lot of extra work for many people; it costs a lot to do the right thing.

In the school holidays we’d leave home after breakfast and not return until about 5 pm. We’d be off exploring an old tin mine, swimming in a lake 2 miles from home, making dens, climbing hay bales on local farms. Even climbed onto a barn roof aged 6 with my brothers so we could dive onto the bales below.
We’d make go karts from bits of wood and old pram wheels and ride them down the hill on the road outside our house, while keeping an eye out for the local boy racers in there VWGolf’s and Ford Escorts.
It was carefree and fun but wouldnt ( didnt)let my own kids do that !
I was a child of the 70’s.
As others have said, less anxiety and mental health issues and less childhood obesity, generally.

This. “Safer” is not always better. Especially as humans we are pretty terrible at assessing and managing risk, and tend to try to take all the risks out of life but only considering certain scenarios while completely ignoring others - we do not balance risk well. Such as children constantly being supervised to keep them “safe” while completely ignoring the risks of this approach to their development of essential life skills.

My teenager has never had a classmate die. This is completely bizarre to me as someone born in the 70s.

Childhood is definitely less dangerous, but I’m still not sure it is better. We had a freedom that her generation will never know.

It was both insanely dangerous and better 😀 Whole days out playing without seeing parents from breakfast till teatime (we'd take a jam sandwich with us), lighting bonfires in the woods, buying bangers from the newsagents, lighting them, and riding your bike over them before they went off 😂
Every boy and a lot of the girls had a penknife. Making 'trolleys' to ride on out of bits of found wood and old pram wheels. Tree climbing. Going 'over the top' on the swings. Diving boards at the swimming pool. Playing hide and seek with the patients at the local mental hospital...
It was a fun childhood, and probably dangerous, but so what 😊