So for context married to my husband for over 10 years and have a son together. He has two children from his previous marriage now 21 and 19.
He doesn’t ever plan anything holiday wise or experience wise for us as a family so I usually do it. Whenever we those rare times together on a break / holiday he will always say ‘ I wish my kids were here ‘ I usually find it upsetting as these are breaks I’ve paid for or organised or gone halfs on and be has never orchestrated a trip/ holiday with his kids .
his family live in a different country. He asked me and my son to go with him in December ( me paying half ) before I even got a chance to book plane tickets he was back to his kids . Told me he was going to take them to see his family abroad next year.
I suggested we cancel our trip this year and instead he use that money to take them instead . I feel anything we experience is rare and always over shadowed by ‘ I wish my kids were here ‘ despite never doing anything to facilitate it. The gutting is he will pay for all their travel and expenses despite one working ‘ because they are my kids ‘ yet when my child eventually met his family I paid 50% of all the travel and accommodation on that and every time since and even this proposed trip I was still expected to pay. His response ‘ they are my kids ‘ well so is our son..
I do think we should step aside and he go with them instead because they have only met them once but do have grandparents here in England which my child doesn’t .
it’s not a option to all go together as we do not have a close relationship and I would find it too much combined with the family reunion his side .
im annoyed im expected to pay, im annoyed anything i plan and pay for is always brought round to his children and if he follows through and takes them and actually pays for it that’s never been given to me and my son. Lastly due to schooling and financial it means my son won’t likely see his only grandparents for About 18 months longer
am I wrong to feel annoyed / frustrated / that it’s unbalanced ?