My uncle has had a challenging time recently. One of his daughters (in her early 20s) has non verbal autism and lots of difficult behaviours, he has had a big fight with the council to get sufficient care. Under a lot of stress he behaved unacceptably and ended up, quite rightly, in jail for violent behaviour. Whilst he was in prison she was placed, and remains, in a secure mental health unit. Not the right place for her but the local authority say they have no other way of caring for her. My uncle has now been released and is extremely angry.
He has in recent years become a bit obsessed with conspiracy theories, was pro Brexit, anti vax and now campaigns for Reform and is very anti immigrant. I appreciate we all have different views but he's just so angry and aggressive. Very intense and dogmatic - you are either with him or against him. Last week he called me ranting and raving about immigrants. How his daughter would be home with him getting the care she needed if it wasnt for immigrants. How everything is 'their fault'. I find this relentless aggression very hard. I am mixed race. My dad (his brother) and his Mum were asian. He claims it's different as we were all born here. He also says his Dad (who was born in China and spoke no English) was a 'different type' of immigrant. When pressed he admits it's 'the asians' he has a problem with. I've challenged him about the racism - pointed out that he's talking about us but he won't have it (apparently Nigel Farage and Tommy Robinson talk a lot of sense).
Our last call was extremely difficult and I think a turning point - following one of his rants, I asked how he expected me to respond. That what he was saying - was hurtful. He said if he was racist so what he didnt care. I said I cared. I cared that he was my Uncle and was supporting people who would attack people like me and those I love for the colour of their skin. He put the phone down and we haven't spoken since. I think I am done. I appreciate he is vulnerable and people are exploiting his anger and upset but I dont want to have that kind of anger/ aggression or someone with those values in my life. But I do feel sad. My dad died and he's his only surviving brother - I thought he cared but apparently not. I shouldn't really be surprised he has many children who aren't in contact with him but it's just all so sad. He's going to end up very alone, is already bitter and angry and no-one will care. I worry about him getting involved in more violent acts but there is literally nothing that I can do.
I so loathe all the people who are stirring this up and making profit from it, leaving broken people (on all sides) with even less. It's so very sad. Where are the inspirational leaders when you need them? All so sad and very hurtful. AIBU to just cut him out now? WWYD?