So we've been friends since 16 in school, like kost relationships we've gone through periods of being closer and then drifted with Uni, living in different countries etc but always kept in touch and met up as a larger group when possible.
We'd become closer in our 30s and then closer still when we both had our first child within a few months of each other, lots of playdates, coffee, messaging parenting advice back and forth.
We've both gone on to have more children and much busier lives, I work what would be considered quite a stressful jobs and do condensed hours. She doesn't work anymore but her husband is in a well paying job that requires him to work late nights and weekends so the household and childcare is on her (she does have a cleaner and put her children in daycare/school)
I've felt in the last year or so our friendship drifting, shes living in what you would consider a "posh" area and has made friends with other non working mums who can meet up, thats fine and understandable.
My issue is she takes forever to message me back, anytime we meet its because I've suggested it and she often cancels or changes plans last minute. On more than one occasion my child has ended up in tears due to her poor planning or inviting other children her child knows which then leaves mine out.
Ive realized we've basically not met up all summer despite her meeting with other mutual friends and I feel she is now not putting in any effort.
AIBU to just not message anymore and essentially ghost her? The group meet ups are quite rare these days so would be likely able to avoid if needed? Or should I give her the benefit of the doubt that shes just busy and a bit inconsiderate to my feelings?