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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To say no to.hamster cage

3 replies

Brightyellowspyrograph · 31/08/2025 14:51

Single parent, not a lot of many coming in and living hand to mouth. Have had hamsters galore and two cats who both died horribly and cost a lot at vets. The last one we adopted with a.lot of health problems from. CAT protection league who said they would help with vet bills if we stayed with the same vets and then refused. I would love a cat but we just can't afford one. DS (16) suddenly announced he wanted a hamster but has a new passion every.couple of weeks. We talked about the care.needed the smell and the cost, but didnt come to a decision. There's a lot going on with college starting and my eldest DD trying to find a job. I have a lot on my plate with various things.
My son ambushed me with a huge second hand hamster cage from the recycle centre that his other older sister bought. He showed up at the door and I said "no". I was really annoyed. True to form he tried to argue it with me and we ended up arguing in the street. I don't like being manipulated. In the end his sister drove off embarrassed and I had to give up and let him bring the cage inside. He was humiliated he said.
AiBU to say no to bl÷÷dy cage?

OP posts:
Slobberchops1 · 31/08/2025 14:53

Well he’s 16 - if wants a pet he will need to get a job to buy one and care for it . If he’s not able to support the cost if a pet he can’t have one

MsTamborineMan · 31/08/2025 14:58

At 16 if he wants a hamster he can buy the stuff and keep it in his room (wheel and all). A 16yo should be capable of doing all the care for a hamster without support and capable of funding it with a part time job. If he cant care for a hamster alone at 16 you've got bigger problems

hididdlyho · 31/08/2025 16:00

YANBU to consider (and raise to your son) the potential vets bills and cost of keeping a hamster to a good quality of life. If your son is known to chop and change his interests, there's nothing to stop him keeping the cage, on the understanding no animal can live in it until he can pay for the day to day care and vets bills. If he goes against this rule he goes to live with his sister.

My partner's mum offloaded a budgie on us after her dog killed his cagemate/brother. He told me that growing up, their family dog would snap at the tails of their budgies (but never caught them) and it was considered funny, I told him it's shitty to even think to scare an animal like that in the first place. I don't agree to keeping birds in cages anyway, so my criteria was that DH gave up his 'mancave' for the budgie to freefly. We still have the budgie (which I take care of) . MIL and her DDog/our (inheritated d/dog) have sadly since passed.

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