How would you ask your child if they were abused by ex partner?

[brokentable]

I have a son in his 20s who as a child lived with me and my ex, I lived with my ex along with my son for around 3 years which would have been while my son was 6-9 years old.
I have heard he has been done for possession of child porn including boys, girls, and animals.
My sons never mentioned anything to me but he does have a lot of MH problems.
Do you think I should tell him what I know and ask him if he ever made him uncomfortable? Or anything else?

I think this is probably above the paygrade of mumsnet (to steal a phrase from reddit)

Maybe someone could point you to where you could find the correct professional service?

Your son already sounds vulnerable - do seek professional advice on this and if you do open the discussion ensure he has support.

No opinion as to the right thing to do except to do whatever you do or don't do from an informed position.

Maybe try tte NSPCC parent helpline for advice

Images of child abuse - the language surrounding this issue is important.

NAPAC will probably be able to advise you on how to approach this with your son they work with a lot of different people, and are very experienced.

Sorry you are right, I should have worded it better and thank you for the advice.

I would ask him, but have a think about the way he would be most comfortable. Would it be easier for him over something like WhatsApp so he can have time to process before replying, and then you can always discuss it more in person if he wants? I don't know if that's good advice or not it was just my instinct, I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this it must have been an awful shock. 💐 x

I would get ahold of a therapist who possibly specializes in CSA to see what they would recommend. I agree this is above Mumsnet paygrade