To have been quite rude to someone trying to be helpful?

[swimatthegym]

This isn’t a massive deal or anything but just wondering if I was really out of order.

I took my two young children swimming today at our gym. When we were getting changed afterwards I went into a ‘family room’ which is a small room designated for parents with young kids. It’s a reasonable size but tricky for getting shoes and socks on as I’d have to kneel down on the damp floor so what I normally do is leave our socks and shoes lined up in the main changing room (not in the way or anything) and put them on last on the way out. So all is fine.

Then when I’m naked (!) someone knocks on the door and flings it open (there aren’t locks) asking if these are our shoes. I was polite that time while groping for a towel and said yes they were, I’d get them in a minute.

But then the door is flung open for a second time and the woman comes in with our shoes and I said (admittedly very sharply) ‘thank you but we don’t need them now.’ She starts wittering about how you never know and I said ‘do you think you could leave us alone so I can get changed?’

I get it’s a changing room and people are going to be naked but one of the reasons I like to go to a cubicle is I’m not totally comfortable with it, as I am a teacher and some of my students do use the gym although I don’t think any of them were there on that occasion thank god! And besides, surely you don’t keep bothering people like that?

The person was weird. We often used to leave our shoes by the changingroom door instead of putting the blue shoes on. Did she think they were going to get stolen? Very odd.

But, it sounds like the changing room you were in wasn't private as such and more of a communal set up for families so she wasn't really out of order entering even if you were naked/changing.

No you weren't out of order and nor were you rude. In fact you were very polite considering that the woman was ignoring your requests. I'm sure she though she was trying to be helpful but she should have not barged in on you, and she should not have ignored your first response. You were quite measured in your response!

You weren't rude. She sounds like a busy body, and she was completely out of order to push into your cubicle twice.

No, that was why I wasn’t rude at first @museumum … I just thought someone else with young children was coming in. But it was really odd the way she came back!

Totally inappropriate for someone to come into a separate changing area when it's in use, end of story. I would have been less polite than you i think!