Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To send my ds to nursery today

26 replies

Tiredmama11 · 27/08/2025 08:03

My son goes to nursery three times a week usually. We’ve kept this routine up since the birth of dd who is 12 weeks old. I’ve been up all night with dd after a very rough night with her the night before too. DH is currently working abroad so I am solo parenting and have no additional help during the night. To add to the chaos, our electric car charger has broken now which means I need to stay in today to wait for the repairman as well as pack for a house move in four weeks.

I’m seriously considering sending ds to nursery today to just give me some breathing space and allow him to have a fulfilled day rather than being around a tired and potentially cranky mum who cannot take him out. My tired brain cannot think rationally - I cannot help but feel as though I’m palming DS off despite the fact that he loves nursery …

OP posts:
BournardTourney · 27/08/2025 08:06

Definitely send him to nursery, he loves it. If it’s an additional day then make out it’s a special treat.

ComfortFoodCafe · 27/08/2025 08:06

Send him!

ToKittyornottoKitty · 27/08/2025 08:07

I don’t get it, is today not one of his usual nursery days? If he usually goes what is the debate?

Eenameenadeeka · 27/08/2025 08:08

Sounds like it would be better both for him and for you, don't feel bad!

Original poster
Tiredmama11 · 27/08/2025 08:10

Today is usually his day at home with me

OP posts:
Overthebow · 27/08/2025 08:11

If there’s the option of sending him then do it. He’ll have a fun day and you’ll be less stressed.

BuffaloCauliflower · 27/08/2025 08:12

Can the nursery take him an extra day? Most wouldn’t let you change like that, but if you can then definitely do and don’t feel guilty about it.

HappySummerDays · 27/08/2025 08:13

Will the nursery have space?
If so send him.

Coffeeishot · 27/08/2025 08:14

Tiredmama11 · 27/08/2025 08:10

Today is usually his day at home with me

Would the nursery take him if it isn't his day ?

Spies · 27/08/2025 08:15

If it's not his day then it seems unlikely they would take him as they will have not included him in the numbers for the day?

doodleschnoodle · 27/08/2025 08:19

Assuming your nursery has the ability to take them then of course send him!

OhHellolittleone · 27/08/2025 08:20

I’ve been there! I sent my daughter for a few extra days when I would have them both on my own, I felt like she’d have a better day than with me - frazzled with a ratty baby and a million things to do. Now I’m in a good routine I have days with them both at home and it’s fine, but it’s so hard at the beginning. I also sent her on a few days when it was sooooo hot at home, knowing she’d have great fun in the cool nursery.

Many people send their kids full time when they’re on mat leave! (And plenty of superhumans do it all on their own, but I take the help I can get!)

DaisyChain505 · 27/08/2025 08:24

Send him to nursery. He will have a lovely day with his friends and you can try your best to gain back any energy you can so that when he’s back home you can be the best version of yourself for him.

turnedthattvoffforgood · 27/08/2025 08:26

All this mum guilty needs to stop. It’s social media telling us we need to do this and that and this and that four our children and never put ourselves first.

of the nursery will take him today then yes absolutely send him

YourAquaLion · 27/08/2025 08:29

Absolutely send him and try not to feel guilty about it. I started sending mine and had a day off on a Monday for a while as I just decided I didn’t like looking after him any more than I had to! I’m a better mum in short doses. I defo shud have been the dad one!

Moonnstars · 27/08/2025 08:29

I don't see the issue with sending him in, however would you not have needed to ask them at least the day before for adding him in last minute? Surely the staffing will be based on the number booked and a lot of settings require 48 hours notice.

Gabbycat245 · 27/08/2025 08:29

Send him OP, he'll have a lovely time and you'll get much needed breathing space. Please don't feel guilty!

ToKittyornottoKitty · 27/08/2025 08:43

Tiredmama11 · 27/08/2025 08:10

Today is usually his day at home with me

Do they even have space for him then? It’s impressive if they’d take him this last minute!

Original poster
Tiredmama11 · 27/08/2025 09:56

Thanks all - there was space thankfully and I have zero guilt as he was very happy to go - even going on a bus trip!

OP posts:
Spies · 27/08/2025 10:03

Tiredmama11 · 27/08/2025 09:56

Thanks all - there was space thankfully and I have zero guilt as he was very happy to go - even going on a bus trip!

Wow you're very fortunate they had space for him. I hope he and you have a great day.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 27/08/2025 10:06

It was lucky they had space but doesn’t sound like you were U at all.

Shame you can’t get DD into childcare for the day too - is there anything you can do to get yourself a proper break whilst your DH is working abroad?

Coffeeishot · 27/08/2025 10:07

That's great they had space for him, i hope your day goes well.

SummerFrog25 · 27/08/2025 10:12

I'd have snuck DD into his back pack!!

🤣obviously not really. But can't say the thought woukdnt have crossed my mind!!

sleep if you can if she does try to feel a bit rested. Don't knock yourself out packing up the house!

ToKittyornottoKitty · 27/08/2025 11:14

Tiredmama11 · 27/08/2025 09:56

Thanks all - there was space thankfully and I have zero guilt as he was very happy to go - even going on a bus trip!

That’s a great nursery! And I'm glad you don’t feel guilt, it’s a no brainer! You can’t pour from an empty cup, and he will have a lovely busy day and hopefully come home tired. I hope today goes a little better for you OP

GiveDogBone · 27/08/2025 18:58

Why are you even thinking twice about it. Yes children do like routines and it can be unsettling when they are broken, but you need your sanity and having a stressed mother is worse for him, you and your baby.