Mum sent text saying abrupt message so I sent it back every time she txt me this afternoon!

[Leo2001]

Chatting with mum via text she's very opinionated and everything is her views her way I'm sick of it tbh I moved away far enough so she cannot just pop but not tht far I cannot be there fir her when needed, (siblings live 2 hours away commute),
Chatting nicely and I got a abrupt don't keep texting me I'm bust sorting things out at home, so every time she has messaged me this evening I sent that text back in reply childish I know but I find her rude and if I say anything I just get well it's your problem, in context other siblings barely visit but do ring her often, she's 75 on her own and I feel responsible and sorry for her, but find this behavior at times well Rude!

You’ve lost the moral high ground by being so petty.
I don’t understand why you wouldn’t just say “I found it quite hurtful the way you told me to stop texting earlier”.

Oh dear.

What has she said in reply to that?

I agree with @ninjahamster, but I would have been very hurt too.

I don't get long back and forths by text. If you want to chat, phone. Chats by text are always prone to go wrong, especially with someone where you might be looking for it.

I don't expect to have the moral high ground just for once I wanted her to see what she sometimes does or says is unacceptable she just simply wrote
OK, mum 🤔😁😱

You’re being very petty.
Just text her later.
Maybe she didn’t mean to be rude and was just busy?

she's very opinionated and everything is her views her way

Yeah, I get it.

They like to give it but they’re not so happy to receive it are they?

Is it me or do some posters have an IQ of about 80 on here? Mumsnet used to be full of intelligent comments but posts like this make me despair!

As someone who no longer has a Mum, I'd say let it go. Once they've gone, you realise how petty things are. I used to argue with my Mum on occasions, would give anything to have her back. It has made me more understanding towards my Dad, he sometimes annoys me, but having been through the pain of Mum's death find it much easier to let it go with him as know it's just not worth it. Frustrating as it can be. Life is too short. They're unlikely to change at this age.

It woukd have been better to say, something on the lines of,

"Hi Mum,
I was enjoying our text chat and thought you were too. I hadn't realised that you were busy.
Next time I catch you at a bad time, let me know. You can always reply to texts when it works for you. Don't feel that you have to reply instantly.
Love etc
PS I'll do the same if you message me when I'm in the middle of something.

A message like that helps you both lay down some boundaries and you don't lose the moral high ground by responding to her abruptness with your own pettiness.

My dd and I text this all the time!

go away I do have a life you know!

god woman all this inane drivel! You must get it from your dad

I thought you had a job?!

and she texts me

mum! 🤦🏻‍♀️ 🥱

what's for lunch? If it's cottage cheese again I'm going to get you assessed

DEMENTIA!!!

etc etc

the harsher the better in our opinion 😂

@Karmacamelia As someone who no longer has a Mum, I'd say let it go. Once they've gone, you realise how petty things are

Not everyone has that sort of relationship with their mum.

She sounds jokes, I love her reply

What is so unacceptable about saying I’m busy I can’t text let’s stop for now. It’s true and sets out a boundary that should be used and she thinks so too as she has said ok

its texting?

Nah, that’s just nasty. First time, reasonable. Every time from then on, bullying really, isn’t it?

I get it op. Sometimes people only understand their own language.

I understand how you feel. It's really wearing when someone does that repeatedly especially when you make the effort to be there for them. If she displays narcissistic behaviour it's likely that you are very easily triggered by it as a protective mechanism, because you have been dealing with it since you were a child. Thats probably why many posters on here don't understand the tole this kind of behaviour can have over long periods of time. Usually when Narcs do this kind of thing it's to provoke, so try to ignore her next time Xx

Did she send them emoji or did you add them ?

Text messages get on my bastard nerves because they're so intrusive. If its just a single message to give me some information or a very brief check in then fine. Otherwise the constant notifications wheh someone wants to have a tex4 conversation over several hours instead of a 3 minute phone call are really really irritating.

You were incredibly petty and childish.

Honestly, you're being very petty.

If you want to chat, just call the woman, FFS. Text conversations are so easily misinterpreted without tone of voice etc.

Text "is this a good time for a call?" and if it is, actually talk to each other.

But if you can't do that, the suggestion above is good.
Hi Mum,
I was enjoying our text chat and thought you were too. I hadn't realised that you were busy.
Next time I catch you at a bad time, let me know. You can always reply to texts when it works for you. Don't feel that you have to reply instantly.
Love etc
PS I'll do the same if you message me when I'm in the middle of something.

Sometimes petty is just fine. You get a high five from me.

@Leo2001 why bother texting? why not just phone??

Why is she not allowed to be busy, I don't get it? It's interesting that you expect her gratitude for your attention, while actually it's you pestering her for attention. Maybe time to get a few friends and give her a day off occasionally?