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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think this was an offer of a loan NOT a gift

32 replies

limescale · 24/08/2025 16:26

If someone said "I would be happy to send you a permanently interest-free lump sum" would you regard it as an offer of a loan not a gift?

The reference to interest-free surely indicates a loan. Or have I missed something? I do not have a great deal of experience with loans (or financial gifts for that matter!).

OP posts:
DiscoBob · 24/08/2025 18:26

limescale · 24/08/2025 17:10

No, it was not in response to me asking for a loan. It would be quite clear in that case I think.

Her first email uses 'send' and 'help you out' (and the interest-free part), no mention of loan.

Show quote history

Well I'm guessing the person is wanting the money back. Did you genuinely believe it to be a gift? And if so why do you think they mentioned interest? Though 'help you out' is also open to interpretation.

Either way the right thing would be to pay it back in reasonable installments. If they did not intend it to be a gift.

Original poster
limescale · 24/08/2025 18:29

DiscoBob · 24/08/2025 18:26

Well I'm guessing the person is wanting the money back. Did you genuinely believe it to be a gift? And if so why do you think they mentioned interest? Though 'help you out' is also open to interpretation.

Either way the right thing would be to pay it back in reasonable installments. If they did not intend it to be a gift.

Show quote history

If you read all my posts you will find you don’t need to be so sneery.

OP posts:
GRex · 24/08/2025 19:02

limescale · 24/08/2025 17:21

She has confirmed it was a gift.
It's quite large, it would be subject to inheritance tax should she die in the next 7 years (she's mid 80s). Shall I raise that with her, or none of my business?
I sent it back anyway (I kind of panicked at the thought of a debt).

Gaaaa I hate money stuff.

Right, then you need to find out of she just wants to gift it to you or give a loan. Accept a gift (if you think she can manage without) amd decline a loan that you don't need.

Laura95167 · 24/08/2025 21:27

A loan. But in doubt id clarify before I took it

DiscoBob · 25/08/2025 13:51

limescale · 24/08/2025 18:29

If you read all my posts you will find you don’t need to be so sneery.

Show quote history

Gawd, I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to be sneery. I was giving honest advice. Which still stands.

BallerinaRadio · 25/08/2025 13:54

limescale · 24/08/2025 16:34

Thanks for super quick answers!

I already sent it back.
Convo went (a few days ago)
me: I've been made redundant
her: I would be happy to send you a permanently interest-free lump sum
me (assuming loan): [effusive thanks] I hope not to need to borrow money but reassuring etc

(today)
Big lump in my account and email saying she's sent it (no mention of loan/gift, repayment or anything).

Me: errr, I think you misunderstood. I've sent it back.

If she sends it straight back it'll probably alert the money laundering team.

This is family - the generation above me.

This is more confusing than your original post, no wonder you're both confused you just need to speak to each other clearly.

Why you didn't just confirm with the person who sent you the money instead of coming on here I don't know

Onoopie · 25/08/2025 14:53

I think loan. ‘Permanently’ would suggest to me you can take as long as you need to pay it back (interest free) though… which is generous but also may come back and bite you should the lender suddenly needs money..

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