uncomfirtable journey

[planejourney]

Interested in people's opinions.
I had a recent journey from hell when an obese/morbidly obese person sat next to me on a flight for 6 hours.
He and his partner both booked aisle seats next to each other and both were morbidly obese. I was in a middle seat and another passenger in the window seat.
He struggled to get into the seat and had to rearrange himself and move bits around in order to get the armrest down. Once in place, the armrest disappeared. He basically overflowed into my seat and had to cross his arms for me to have any room. His right leg was in my space and his left leg was in the aisle. He was unable to get the table down in front of him.
Unfortunately I had to spend the full journey with body contact with this person. This not only invaded my personal space but was also really hot! It was a night flight and the flight was full, so I didn't want to disturb people sleeping by asking if a swap/move was possible. This person proceded to fall asleep and snore very loudly to a point where people were turning around. The trolley or people could not get past his leg in the aisle so he had to keep moving it. To make matters worse, the person in front reclined their seat right back. I felt trapped!
I had a few looks of pity and the staff could clearly see how uncomfortable it was.
AIBU to think he should have bought a second seat? Airlines should make it clear and consider the comfort and safety of all passengers. I paid for a seat and got half a one. Did this person lack consideration for others?

There is actually a very easy way; buy two seats. The two of them should have bought three seats in a row instead of deciding to try and get away with using their neighbour’s seat.

I have had similar when I last travelled alone. I think the problem is that if you’re a single traveller who doesn’t pay for a seat you then get the middle and can get unlucky. I think the airlines should have more of a responsibility as they make the seats pretty small and know they won’t fit everyone.

I have had similar when I last travelled alone. I think the problem is that if you’re a single traveller who doesn’t pay for a seat you then get the middle and can get unlucky. I think the airlines should have more of a responsibility as they make the seats pretty small and know they won’t fit everyone.

It should be upto the airlines to ensure passengers safely fit in seats. Unfortunately they are all about the money and cramming as many people as possible in so overweight passengers do take up more space than allocated to them. It’s not an easy solution as nobody should be made to feel ashamed for being over weight but others shouldnt have to suffer for it. Ideally two morbidly obese passengers travelling together should be able to purchase the row of seats to sit together and spread out, no pun intended.

its not a nice experience is it. Yes I had empathy and didn't want to be rude or cause him embarrassment either. It being a night flight and quiet with people sleeping too, I didn't want to disrupt others around me. Hopefully it won't happen again. I just think its poor from the airlines and there should be strict rules enforced.

Still not OP’s problem.

A few years ago, I booked seats on a flight with DH and our two DC. As the configuration was 3 seats, 3 seats, I booked middle and aisle, aisle and middle.
When we got on board the window seat was occupied by a very large man.

Sat down, was a bit of a squash as he was spilling over, smiled politely etc.

I then realised his wife and two kids were in the row behind. And I must admit that annoyed me slightly (and I’m probably being unreasonable, I do realise that), but it felt that what was a you problem became someone else’s problem. His kids were relatively young so between big dad and little kid they would have fit into two seats.

Now I book 3 seats together with the aisle seat across.

I did have to get up to go to the bathroom and it was a real struggle for him to get out of the seat and took ages 😔 imagine if an evacuation was needed?

That was one of my first thoughts. So unsafe for you if you needed to move quickly.

Op I know you say you didn't want to embarras him or disrupt anyone else but by not speaking up for yourself, you took all the discomfort. Don't live like this. Care about yourself.

Yes to extender question. Yes agree and size 16 I think is the average size now?
I do have empathy. Airlines should have consistent rules and accommodate for larger people. There is no shaming here. It is about the comfort and safety of all passengers

I guess so. I think as it was a temporary situation and because of the circumstances I put up with it, but shouldn't have to. If it happens again I will probably handle it differently

that would have worked perfectly for them, but I guess they didn't want to have to purchase another extra seat, maybe they couldn't afford to.

I think if you buy a seat on an airplane you need to expect all sorts of people to be on it. You were mildly inconvenienced by someone else’s body. Nobody died and there were far worse people you could have sat next to.

it was constant contact. He fell asleep and his arm dropped onto me. That woke him up!

I disagree. When you buy a seat you expect a seat, not one you have to share with the person next to you.

The arm rest should never have to lifted so a stranger can overflow into your space. If they can't fit in the seat, they need to buy two, or airlines need to make bigger seats. The arm rest is the boundary between your space and his, he removed the boundary for his comfort and your discomfort. CF.

Well I believe OP.

Me and partner are obese we book a third seat.
And only book flights with 3 seats in a row and prebook the seats.
We would never not book an extra seat because its not fair on the other passenger.
If we couldnt afford a third seat we wouldnt go
Everyone is then happy

(To note if you need an extender seat belt, you cant sit in seats with extra leg room at the exit door)

I wouldn't say it was mildly inconvenienced. It was really uncomfortable and I was dissapointed as the flights were expensive. Yes agree, maybe so. Still doesn't take away the safety aspect and the fact a lot of my seat was taken up. I didn't make a fuss, but I got a lot of sympathetic looks, including from air hostess, so it was clearly recognised. It is what it is.. just wanted to vent a little and im not alone.

Instead of booking 2 seats I think airlines should provide larger seats in a safe place (ie where the morbidly obese person could not obstruct other passengers in an emergency evacuation) and charge, say 1.5 x the cost.

How you’d force people to do this for themselves is another matter…

you are very considerate! Apologies I wouldn't want to offend anyone. Im annoyed for you that you have to pay extra and wish the airlines had more options. Maybe a discount. Really not sure what the solution is

Why do you mainly feel sorry for the obese man when he took up some of @planejourney's seat, stuck out into the aisle, inconveniencing the staff and proceeded to fall asleep overnight? @planejourney meanwhile was squashed, uncomfortable, unable to sleep and didn't even have the use the of the whole seat she had paid for. The obese couple should have booked 3 seats between them and sat next to each other. They obviously booked separate seats deliberately and were aware of the effect on others.

Exactly, I would have asked them to find a solution, surly there were other seats available, even if it meant moving you to business class. At the very least you could have asked the passenger to move his leg out of your space. In the past I have put my handbag on my seat next to me to create a vertical barrier at armrest level to prevent other passenger spilling onto my seat.

That is the very considerate approach that I just suggested too.

That would have made me feel panicky. I can’t cope with being pressed up against a strange man. I’m fine with moving over a little in my seat to avoid contact, but if I couldn’t avoid him id be really upset. I recently went to a show and a man put his entire knee into my space, completely manspreading and touching mine, and I had to tell him to move it. It felt creepy. He looked startled when I asked and did move it. It’s so inconsiderate, why do they think we should just suck it up so they can be more comfortable?

And your ex didn’t feel mortified when he shoe horned himself into an aeroplane seat, nudging fellows passengers out the way, taking over both arm rests? @WhiteNoiseBlur