To be really proud of myself?

[NeverBeSoKind]

I’ve spent pretty much all of my life (I’m 31 now) hating exercise and thinking ‘it’s just not for me’. Nothing physical has ever come naturally; I am very very clumsy and prone to falling over, and the things I like are baking and reading and doing puzzles - so very much an indoors person.

I’ve also always strongly correlated exercise with punishment for eating/a need to lose weight and generally any previous attempts to try and exercise more have led to some disordered eating habits which has become problematic.

I do quite enjoy walking/hiking - and I don’t drive so do get a reasonable amount of steps in most days. Back in March/April time, I decided I needed to get fitter - evidently doing some walking wasn’t sufficient and I could tell that I was really unfit.

And so I joined a gym! I had never step foot in a gym in my entire life and so this was a big deal for me. I started with various bits of incline walking and using the StairMaster and found myself enjoying it significantly more than expected. I got a little braver and started using some of the weight machines, and then a little braver still and ventured into the free weights section. I’ve started running now as well - and just did 5km in 30:46 and this all just feels astonishing to me.

I know it’s only four or so months in but the change to my mental health has been so significant! I feel so much happier in who I am and the fact that I am starting to achieve things and make progress. Moving my body now feels like such a privilege and something that I get to do, rather than a punishment or something I have to do. I’m very conscious of talking about this too much in real life (mainly because I used to find it dull when other people did so!) but I really am so proud of me and wanted to share.

YANBU. Well done! it's life changing when you find the right exercise for you. Keep going :)

It's great when it sticks and becomes a regular part of your week and you look forward to it.

Well done!

Well done! 5k in 30 minutes is fantastic!

It’s very good to be proud of yourself. So often, no one else is.

very well done. My weight is getting out of hand so I will be buying some Nordic walker poles this week and getting out and about. This winter has been so cold but it’s spring in a few weeks.

Well done-I’m very much like the ‘before’ you x

Amazing. Your 5k time is great.
I think once you start to feel results you get more motivation.
Have you considered personal training? I felt that helped my confidence with a lot of the machines as well.

Tell me more!

I’ve also never stepped over the door way of a gym as it looks and sounds like a lot of hard work and I also don’t have a clue where to start.

Fabulous! Well done!

Thank you everyone!

@winter8090 I have considered personal training, but there are currently only male PTs working at my gym and for all sorts of reasons I think I would find that quite intimidating. (One has posters explaining that in your first session you will be weighed and your current body composition analysed, and I’d much rather not go through this!). Plus, I have a default to perfectionism/obsessive behaviours and I’d worry a regular PT could exacerbate some of these tendencies. At the moment I’m just having a lot of fun going, and I don’t want to change things and jeopardise that while it’s working! However - my gym does do some small women-only strength sessions which I’ve been too, and that helped a lot with the confidence to do proper squats/deadlifts/bench press etc.

@HayuBingeWatcher Things that helped in terms of getting started were:

1. I had a specific goal in mind. This wasn’t an appearance/weight related goal, but I was walking the Yorkshire Three Peaks back in May and knew I needed to be in better shape for this, so I knew I was working towards that - so while I definitely wasn’t loving it from the start, that goal provided me with the incentive to stick at it.

2. Got some gym outfits that I felt reasonably comfortable/good in. This wasn’t easy - I cried in the Sports Direct changing rooms - but having things to wear that I feel happy in helped.

3. The very first time I ventured in I did so with a friend - I go by myself the vast majority of the time but I think I’d have kept backing out if I hadn’t had a plan to go with someone.

4. Small steps! As I stay, I just started with walking on the treadmill until I reached a point where I felt happy/confident being there. I then started to slowly introduce new things - but only ever one thing that scared me at a time!

5. My gym does offer strength training classes for women - this was a huge thing for me because it didn’t feel too intense and everyone was really supportive. That helped a lot with confidence and trying out more new things.

It’s really nice to hear positive comments about my 5k time. I’m often quite hard on myself and I sort of feel embarrassed it’s not quicker (despite only running 5k for the first time with no walking/stopping on August 5th) and so while I have quite a lot work colleagues who run, I haven’t wanted to talk to them about it. So I’m continuing to try to be kind to myself and celebrate the small wins!