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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Boyfriend and pregnancy sickness

30 replies

Darlasmam · 22/08/2025 19:17

I have recently had two consecutive miscarriages, and I am pregnant again. In all of the pregnancies I have suffered from severe morning sickness. I am on 3 different anti emetics at the moment. In a pregnancy with my older child (not my current partner's) I had hyperemesis and had several weeks of inpatient admissions for IVs and was still vomitting 20+ times a day.

My partner is not very sympathetic or helpful, for example tonight he finished work and I said we were having soup and toasties for tea as it was the least offensive smelling food I could think of in my haste to get out of Asda as looking at the food set me off retching. He opened the fridge to have a look, I asked him to close the fridge as I could smell the marinated raw chicken that was in there and it was making me gag. I cooked mine and my son's food, he said he was going to do his own, he then proceeded to fry the marinated chicken in oil and can't understand why the smell is making me cry. The whole house stinks, even with windows open and a fan on. For further context, he isn't that clued up when it comes to anything relating to pregnancy, I also get migraines and when we are in the car he still has loud music playing despite knowing I'm having a migraine and both times that I miscarried he went to work as normal and left me to deal with it alone, he never came to any scans or appointments however he has no issue booking days off work for tattoo appointments.

AIBU to expect him to be more considerate? Or at the very least, if he can't be helpful then he could avoid doing things to make the sickness worse? Is this how other men behave?

OP posts:
HelloHellNo · 22/08/2025 21:37

Tell him to fix up or fuck off.

pinkyredrose · 22/08/2025 22:32

Do you really think he'll be a good father? He sounds very self absorbed.

sunnyhoneybumblebee · 23/08/2025 05:59

He sounds like my ex husband…….
his behaviour is shit. You will be better on your own

sunnyhoneybumblebee · 23/08/2025 06:01

I would give him a very clear and blunt ultimatu. If he continues to treat you without an ounce of empathy he can go and permanently fuck off somewhere else before the baby is born

Gladysknightjustwalkinmyshoes · 23/08/2025 06:08

GoldenRosebee · 22/08/2025 19:20

YNBU for asking him to be more considerate, but this behaviour might continue past birth.

No might about it Goldenrosebee as I'm sure you're well aware MN is littered with thread's like this.
He'll be as much use as no use once baby arrives.

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