For feeling frustrated after a job rejection despite feeling I did everything right?

[ThisLimeMoose]

I recently interviewed for a role I was really excited about. I prepared a full presentation, anticipated questions, and followed up promptly and professionally when they asked me for a copy of my presentation. The interview seemed to go well.

However, I’ve just been informed via email that I was unsuccessful. I don’t get what I did “wrong” because I feel I did everything I could: prepared, professional, and thoughtful throughout. They’ve declined to give feedback in their generic email.

AIBU for feeling frustrated and questioning what I could have done differently, even though I know some things are out of my control?

I think if you've gone to the effort of a presentation then they should give feedback if you want it. But realistically it isn't going to change anything so move on and start applying for other things.

I doubt you did anything wrong. The job market is horrific at the moment. I’ve just secured a role after applying for MANY vacancies and only getting to interview twice - I’ve never experienced this before. It seems very much an employers market right now. Please don’t feel discouraged, I’m certain you performed brilliantly even though you weren’t successful. I would certainly contact them to ask for feedback though.

I interview people a lot. Often it’s not that you did anything wrong, just that someone else was better. Better in a way you couldn’t beat - so it’s not “your fault”.

But they should give feedback.

It can also be quite often the case that they already have someone in mind to hire, but they have to go through the recruitment process anyway.

You probably did well, but someone else did slightly better. That’s how it works I’m afraid. There may have been someone internal already lined up for the job and the interviews were just a formality. You never know.

Be grateful they told you you'd been rejected. I cannot tell you the number of times I've done the interview, presentation etc and they couldn't even be bothered to tell me the outcome.

YANBU but employers don't give a fuck lately. I've had several of these recently. Just gotta toughen up and bear it.

This.

You could have done everything perfectly right but there was just a better candidate on the day.

I had this recently and struggled.

Ive come to accept the job market is very different these days
But its hard. Really hard...

I'm so sorry OP. I still remember a similar experience many years ago, down to 2 candidates. I did get feedback and was told the employee who would be working with the new candidate had more in common with the other person, a shared hobby or interest. Sometimes it's so close they have to find differences. My dh was recently on the other side of this, 3 positions for 5 applicants, all excellent. It came down to profiling.

Absolutely this. It’s rubbish of them to decline to give you feedback.

Sometimes it’s tough for the hiring manager. They would love to hire more than one person when there’s more than one strong candidate, but there’s a limited budget.

Yes the jobs market is terrible in practically all areas, it amazes me how many hoops they expect applicants to jump through and how little they give in return.

Rubbish not to give feedback. It could be you were just pipped to post.

If they don't give feedback then are they really an organisation you want to work for? You invested a lot of time and effort into the interview, yet they didn't show you any respect and refused to reply. This is probably a sign of the general working culture and not a team I would want to join.

Also having worked in HR, the organisations who refuse to give feedback often can't think of any legally allowable feedback and it's easier just to blanket ban it. I have witnessed higher up HR managers sitting on interview panels justify their choices based on knowing someone outside of work, liking someone's accent more than another person's, suspecting that a woman may have been pregnant so choosing the other candidate etc. These are not things you can openly say to a candidate who asks for feedback and they are a sign of a very bad organisation to work for.

It sounds like you dodged a bullet and the company may not be what it seems.

I think if they ask you to prepare a presentation they should give feedback.

But as PP have said, often it's not that a candidate has done anything wrong, but that someone else just has the edge - a bit more experience or slightly better presentation skills etc.

No, this shouldn't be a race to the bottom. It's bad you didn't receive any news but that doesn't make ops poor experience any better.

Probably went to someone internal

agree with above. It's not about doing anything wrong, it's about someone being better. It could be slightly more experienced here, or a slightly more relevant past role, nothing you could actually do anything about.

That's why schools trying to be so "inclusive" and not acknowledging the top of the class are recipe for disasters, kids leave thinking they are adequate when they don't understand that they must be the best. Ultimately, there's only one job.

It doesn't mean you won't be the best for the next role.

let's be honest, it's true for most places. People don't want to employ robots, they want to employ people. The "best" candidate will be the one who fits the best.

You can shortlist as much as you want, ultimately when you have to pick 1 of the 2 or 3 best ones, you pick your favorite -then you make up waffle to justify.

People will be spending more waking hours with colleagues than their own partners, why should they pick someone they don't have the best vibe with?

It's either naive or very disingenuous to pretend you can just leave it to an AI to make the best choice - or don't complain the AI is replacing you full stop.

Their loss not yours. Declining feedback is a red flag IMO. Reframe as a bullet dodged. Best of luck OP. The right position will turn up, patience.

I’m sorry you were unsuccessful op. But you’re loooking at it wrong. You don’t ger the job as a prize for doing well and everything right. You get the job for being the best, the best fit for the role and organisation. So all it means is someone else did better and was a better fit, more suitable. Dust yourself off and move on, any feedback will be appeasing nonsense. When all they want to say is sorry we preffered Jane.

It's poor that they don't provide feedback when you've invested so much of your time in it.

In my experience on the other side of it, we usually have at least two or three candidates that have done 'nothing wrong' during the interview process. In such cases it usually comes down to who will be the best fit in the current team. This is something so uniquely specific that feedback would be pretty meaningless

YANBU to be frustrated though at all. You will get there in the end but that isn't particularly helpful at this moment in time.

It's not you it's them OP.

I got turned down for a job i really wanted a couple of years ago after giving my best in interview. I was very down about it and wondered what i'd done wrong.

Last month i applied for a job at the same establishment. Although always nervous about interviews, for various reasons i had a suspicion it was just a formality and id got the position as soon as i applied. And yes i got the job! I thought about the other candidates wondering what they'd done 'wrong', just like i had done before, but they'd done nothing wrong. Sometimes the employer knows who they want and you could have gone in there and turned water into wine and you still wouldn't have got the job.
💐

Can't you reach out for feedback

The job market is really, really tough at the moment. I don't remember it being this bad since the 2009 recession.