Getting divorced. Been together 20 years. I instigated as very unhappy. Since primary school age children it became more apparent, my ex was complete manchild, no emotional and limited practical support. He expected sex when frankly I was exhausted and had zero interest and I was having to occasionally force myself just to shut him up. He acted shocked and didn’t agree/ accept when I ended it, said he had no idea despite my repeated requests for support. Now, some months on, trying to agree finances, I believe he has guilt tripped me. I have agreed he can knock off substantial amount that he already had in savings 20 years ago, when if we went to court, I’d get half of everything. I’ve agreed to give him half of my pension. I feel he’s being petty- I’m not allowed a penny more than the amount he has said he feels I’m entitled to. I’ve agreed 50/50 childcare as well so he doesn’t have to give me any maintainence. To be honest I just want out asap, I feel morally up there with mother Theresa as I could have pushed for (and exceeded in getting) more money. It seems the men always feel put out that the women is entitled to half of everything for their contribution with looking after the house and childcare (and in my case much of my wages also go towards household bills, while he earns a lot more, pays more towards bills and also has a vast surplus to save each month, so I haven’t exactly been getting a free ride). Everyone’s telling me I’m being too nice with the finances. Solicitor can’t advise as we haven’t gone official expensive route. I might be wrong but feel like he’s punishing me for daring to end the relationship with him. I work part time, will pick up more hours when kids are at high school/ a bit older as my job is very inflexible so would be difficult to currently increase even with children only 50% of time. I lived alone before meeting my husband and have been primary carer of children, have lived frugally many times (lived childhood in poverty) and don’t have many possessions/ expensive tastes and I can easily skip dinner to feed my children if required etc, so i’m not too worried about those aspects. I’m not doubting my decision to divorce, have not doubted that once, but I am still a bit worried, we have had some major disagreements/ arguments and i’m worried how the coparenting will work when you ideally need to be very cooperative with this level of shared care. I feel a shadow of my former self, am I being unreasonable to worry if I manage on my own?