To think it’s time to admit I have a problem

[Umpumapa]

I’m drinking everyday apart from Saturdays and Sundays as DH is at home. I don’t get “bladdered” as such, just to the point where it makes me feel good and relaxed. I know that this still isn’t normal and I can’t believe I’ve gotten into a pattern of drinking every day mon-fri. Is there any help I can get as my brother is an alcoholic and I know the impact it can cause. I’m telling myself it’s just something I do as an habit when bored but now I’m wondering if I’m beginning to get a problem.

Please no judgment. I’m going through a really difficult time at the moment for a number of reasons

Identifying you have a problem is the biggest hardest first step. From what you say, yes, I suspect you do (especially as you have identified it as such). Are you ready to address it? Good luck x

Well done for seeking help - thats a great first step.

Have you tried tracking your units? Something like the drinkaware app would be helpful.

If you're drinking a glass or two of wine every night thats a whole different thing from a bottle or two of wine...

I was drinking every day, and the units were creeping up. I had hypnotherapy 5 years ago and haven't even thought about picking up a drink since. I had no faith before hand that it would work. So grateful to have my life back ❤️

I’m not sure how many units I’m having. I drink cider. Mon-fri usually anything from 8-10 cans/bottles. I get frustrated when DH gets home as that means I have to stop drinking

I'd suggest tracking for a week would be a good start. Or you could look retrospectively at the last week and work it out roughly.

If you download Drinkaware its a free app to monitor drinking and also shows your level of risk. You can set goals for e.g. more non drinking days or fewer drinks.

AA has local meetings and online one.
There will be other local services just google where you live and alcohol problem.

Is that 8-10 cans per night? Or for the whole week? If every night, that’s a significant number of units across a week. I take it your DH doesn’t like you drinking?

8 cans a night for 5 nights would be about 80 units a week. 8 across the whole week would be about 16. The recommended amount is no more than 14 units a week.

@Waitingfordoggo 8-10 per day. No he doesn’t

Everything you've said points to it being a problem. The 'annoyed when partner comes home as have to stop drinking' bit is telling. It's great that you recognise it, and it's time to look for help, and/or begin to make the choice to NOT do it.
(I've had issues myself (not any more) as have most members of my family, and my ex worked in addiction, so it's familiar territory to me.)

Getting frustrated when you can’t drink is a sure sign of a serious problem. In fact in the US its one if the criteria for diagnosing an alcohol abuse problem. Don’t be frightened of the truth. Boldly embrace yourself and ask for help. Your future is much brighter than your past and present.

Go to your GP and they will refer you to the services you need. You've admitted you have a problem which is the first step so good luck in your goal to stop😊

8 - 10 a day really is a lot. That’s one whole week per night.

you’ve identified a problem which is the first step. Does anyone else know you drink this much?

good luck finding the help you need. My DH very recently gave up drinking as his behaviour got out of hand.

I’m a recovering alcoholic and you’ve taken the first step towards your own recovery. Ignore the posters telling you how many units you’re drinking, you KNOW you’re drinking too much. You need to get yourself a good support network in place, starting with your GP. Stopping drinking suddenly can cause seizures. You may need medication to manage this. Next, find something to focus on instead of drinking. I took up patchwork and added a new square for each week I remained sober. Also tell people. You’re going to need friends on your side. Sending you positive energy.

Are you drinking throughout the day? Does your husband believe that you don’t drink at all?

There are approx 2 units in 1 can of cider. That is approx 80 to 100 units per week. Yes that is a LOT!!

Get to the GP, no need to do this the painful way. They can prescribe something to make it easier to detox.

Then comes the really hard part, you need to get to the root of your drinking and start working on it. I drank because I was 'bored' but it was/ is so so so much more than that.

I did do AA for a few years and would never knock it but I prefer SMART meetings. They are mainly online with some in person ones.

Today start listing to the audio book 'This Naked Mind' anyone who even has a 'normal' drinking habit should listen to it.

It has taken a lot longer than I would have liked, but I genuienly have no desire to drink anymore. To begin with my only aim was to be sober, but in order to stay sober I needed to recovery. To recover I needed to face all the absolute crap in my past

@Umpumapa I really admire your honesty. This isn't something that you can, or need to, face alone. At the level you are drinking at, it would be dangerous for you to try to stop or drastically reduce without medical support. Your GP will be able to prescribe medication to lower the risks and side effects.

Do you feel able to tell your husband that you are struggling?

OP you know you’re drinking too much. No judgement here as I’m in a similar position but a bit further down the road as I have some support in place, although I’m still very much at the start of my journey. First of all speak to your GP as they may suggest medical support - at those volumes you could be at risk of physical issues if you suddenly stop.

There are many, many resources available and easily accessible. Sober blogs, Instagram accounts, podcasts, books, audiobooks, physical or online meetings.

Personally I rate SMART meetings - there are online meetings and you can do some of them with no camera.
Drink by professor David Nutt is excellent as is William Porter’s Alcohol Explained, if you like facts and evidence!

Finally, be kind to yourself. You’ve jumped the biggest hurdle of identifying and admitting your drinking has become problematic. Good luck!

Speak to your GP. There are loads of services who can offer help and guidance so you can reduce your drinking to less harmful levels.

I admire your honesty- I think you need to see your GP as soon as you can.

The world isn’t split into addicts and non addicts or alcoholics and non alcoholics so don’t worry about labels. They aren’t useful in some situations. Fair to say you are feeling a bit out of control and need some support to make changes.

Getting the right support is critical. Have you ever been to an AA meeting? Could this be a good place to start? Is there anything stopping you from going?