We've been together 20 years this year and as we are now approaching our mid 50's, with a blended family (I have DD 26 from previous, other half has DS 28, from previous. We also have a DS 17, together). We have decided to get married. Decision made mostly due to legalities around the dreaded ' what happens if something happens to either of us'. We are very much happy as we are, but both feel its time to, well, put a ring on it. We have decided to ask our older, close friends to be our witnesses. My problem is I now feel very real 'mum guilt' over it all. We have talked over the years of just sodding off and doing it, so I dont think it'll come as any great shock to anyone. We've both been married before. My mum is elderly and I don't think she'd be upset. My brother much the same, though I think would be disappointed with no celebration. They live 400 miles away. In laws to be are down the road, but don't drive and are unaware we see partners sister ( a whole other subject of playing one sibling off against the other 🙄) and if we invite some people and not others, we run the risk of making a big 'thing"out of it all. Plus, there's the cost. We're not flush, not skint either, but would rather spend money on something we'd enjoy, like a decent holiday abroad next year, something we've not done for years. I want to have a nice wedding, meaningful but compact. We are taking the friends out for a nice meal after the ceremony. Its mid week, in late October. AIBU in not telling anyone? I'm rubbish at secrets and feel I'll be letting the kids down...help!