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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To give honest feedback to estate agent?

101 replies

Apricotily · 17/08/2025 14:25

Do you give truthful negative feedback when viewing a house with an estate agent? I'm autistic but can mask what I feel and say, when I know that saying the truth might offend someone. To me, looking at a house with an estate agent isn't this sort of situation. Hope that makes sense.

We've viewed a few houses this week with estate agents. One seemed incredibly offended when I share my thoughts, e.g. she was saying how wonderful the kitchen was, I said that it was clearly 20 years old and even then wasn't a great kitchen. She asked what I meant, so I explained that it was a cheap, plastic kitchen, which it was! It was wood effect laminate and blue plastic worktop. She made me repeat what I had said, presumably to embarass me. What's the point of this?

There were other features that I liked and said so, e.g. the garden was small and mostly pebbles, I said how nice it looked and that we wanted a low maintenance garden. Other people might well have been put off and said they would prefer a larger garden, or a lawn. Surely they need to give genuine feedback to their clients? I've had other estate agents say that it is "refreshing" to hear genuine feedback, which I think is probably indicative that they aren't used to it.

When we sold our house, any feedback was useful. Some of it we could do something about, some not, e.g. people who thought our garden was too small, it's a fair point but nothing we could do. People who thought the kitchen was dated, we could do something about, e.g. new cupboard doors in a more fashionable colour.

OP posts:
ShesTheAlbatross · 18/08/2025 07:27

It’s weird for the estate agent to take it personally.

I was only honest about things the owner could do something about. Otherwise I didn’t think there was any point.

I get what people are saying about being honest so that the EA knows what other houses to show you, but I never felt like I was getting that kind of service from an EA. They generally asked a few basic questions (area, budget, no. of bedrooms) and then I was just sent everything that matched, not a specifically curated list of ones that they thought I’d like based on previous comments on other houses.

The only time I was fairly brutally honest was a house that was lived in by a couple and their 3 adult children - all heavy smokers. I only looked at one room before leaving. The smell was horrendous and would’ve taken a lot of work to get rid of - definitely replacing all the carpets but also scrubbing walls etc. I was pregnant so we were going to be moving with a newborn and it would have been too much immediate work.

JoshLymanSwagger · 18/08/2025 07:42

We viewed a house once, years ago.
4 bed detached with double garage.

They'd converted half the garage...the back half...the EA insisted you'd still be able to park a car in the front half, even though there was a brick pillar holding the roof up. 🤦🏻‍♀️
The husband had done some DIY. Unfinished laminate flooring all over the ground floor. Bathroom with some very odd pipework sticking out from behind the loo/basin. Kitchen with doors/drawer fronts missing and a very sticky and worn worktop. Shower curtains instead of the screen over the ensuite shower cubicle (the frame was still there).
The best was one bedroom had no door, it was painted - floor, walls and ceiling - in a dark green with a dartboard on the wall...and very punctured plasterboard around it.

Whe the EA called to see what I thought, I'd already had a bad morning, so I completely lost my "be nice" filter and let rip. I ended the conversation by saying we wouldn't offer more than half of the asking price.

Imagine my surprise getting a phonecall a couple of hours later, asking for the exact figure of my offer. Shock

We didn't buy it.

Sometimes it pays to be brutally honest.

Ohmygodthepain · 18/08/2025 07:50

As a seller the only feedback I've ever been pissed off about was the sort of stuff that was glaringly obvious from the sales particulars meaning their viewing was a waste of all our time.

Eg the garden is too big (despite full description and several photos on the notes)
We want for bedrooms not three (why fucking look at a 3 bed with no scope to extend)
The garage is detached (well, yeah, as in the sales notes)

Personal taste is a perfect explanation to walk away but don't give excuses that prove you're hard of thinking.

Apricotily · 18/08/2025 09:32

LOL at the unpleasant people who think I'm boasting about buying a 2nd home. We are not buying a 2nd home, but have relocated to an area where lots of houses currently for sale have been used as 2nd homes or Airbnbs. As I said in the OP, we are currently renting whilst we look for our new long term home. I don't mind putting in a new kitchen, bathroom and redecorating. But I don't want to pay the top price for the street for a house that I would then need to spend money on updating. I don't think anyone does, particularly in a falling market, which is the case in coastal areas.

It's useful to find that the overwhelming majority of people agree that we should continue to be honest in our feedback to estate agents.

OP posts:
Laxoverhols · 18/08/2025 10:04

Apricotily · 18/08/2025 09:32

LOL at the unpleasant people who think I'm boasting about buying a 2nd home. We are not buying a 2nd home, but have relocated to an area where lots of houses currently for sale have been used as 2nd homes or Airbnbs. As I said in the OP, we are currently renting whilst we look for our new long term home. I don't mind putting in a new kitchen, bathroom and redecorating. But I don't want to pay the top price for the street for a house that I would then need to spend money on updating. I don't think anyone does, particularly in a falling market, which is the case in coastal areas.

It's useful to find that the overwhelming majority of people agree that we should continue to be honest in our feedback to estate agents.

Absolutely no one thinks you shouldn’t be honest in your feedback op on this thread op. No one.

adlitem · 18/08/2025 10:12

I think it depends. My friend were selling their house and they were getting feedback like - we don't like the area, it doesn't have a garage, etc. There's literally nothing my friend could have done about that and not really anything to do with the house. Surely the prospective buyers should have considered those things before wasting everyone's time.

RosesAndHellebores · 18/08/2025 10:36

I agree @Apricotily. We once viewed an incredible house but the kitchen was tiny and in the middle of the house. The house was done to perfection and priced accordingly. We told the agent the kitchen was the deal breaker because huge modification was required to change it. They were incredibly arsy about it. Tough. It was the truth. It was not the house for anyone who loved cooking.

oncemoreuntothebeachdearfriends · 18/08/2025 17:28

I once rented a house while my own property was being underpinned, & the owners decided to sell at the end of my 6 months.
It was awful, a ballroom-sized lounge & a tiny kitchen: fridge & freezer had to go in the lounge, no room anywhere for a DW.

The master bedroom was painted red , the only place to fit the bed was with the headboard up against the radiator under window....
The local EA came to view, we were near neighbours & on friendly terms. He was scathing about the place, ridiculous design features, appalling decor, difficult to sell etc
BUT, his sales details were incredible - I wouldn't have recognised the place.
We laughed, he insisted he was not lying.

fetchacloth · 18/08/2025 18:24

YANBU I've always been direct and honest with estate agents as feedback is useful for them for future viewings.
However, one viewing I had years ago was absolutely awful. The house had rubbish and dirty laundry on the lounge floor and the kitchen was really dirty - the washing up hadn't been done for days and the smell was vile 😳. I didn't bother to look upstairs and fed this back to the agent as a warning to others. I don't expect a palace but it should be reasonably clean and tidy for viewing.

GiveDogBone · 18/08/2025 18:57

Any estate agent who does not want honest feedback is an idiot. Your honest feedback helps them understand what type of property you like.

I was viewing a property today and said out loud that the back garden was a bit “too Essex” for my taste (artificial grass and hot tub). The agent laughed out loud and said I know exactly what you mean!

CarpetKnees · 18/08/2025 19:12

Ohmygodthepain · 18/08/2025 07:50

As a seller the only feedback I've ever been pissed off about was the sort of stuff that was glaringly obvious from the sales particulars meaning their viewing was a waste of all our time.

Eg the garden is too big (despite full description and several photos on the notes)
We want for bedrooms not three (why fucking look at a 3 bed with no scope to extend)
The garage is detached (well, yeah, as in the sales notes)

Personal taste is a perfect explanation to walk away but don't give excuses that prove you're hard of thinking.

But very often, when you are ready to buy your 'perfect house' just isn't available, so you need to physically get into houses to get a real feel for what might be 'good enough'.

Plus, EAs will quite often persuade people to 'just have a look at this one' which wouldn't have made your shortlist.
25 years ago, they did that with us. We'd booked with them to see 2 houses, one after the other and they said, 'let us show you this one as well'. Fair enough we thought, it's only and extra 20mins on the morning. Well readers, this is the house we fell in love with the minute we stepped inside, and we've been very happy here ever since.

I've been supporting my adult dc to buy their houses, and am close to 2 dns and a God child all of whom have bought in the last 4 years, and it has been the same with them. In theory you know what you want, but if you are willing to have an open mind then you sometimes realise that something on your list wasn't the be all and end all. Of course, that does also mean that sometimes you look at a house with a big garden or no garage, or one in another area hoping the house will be so good it sways you, and sometimes it doesn't, but it doesn't mean you shouldn't look, as sometimes it does.

AluckyEllie · 18/08/2025 19:45

Sounds like a dud estate agent. They want the house to go for top price to get the biggest commission so they tell the vendor it’s too small etc when they ask how viewings went rather than the truthful ‘it’s overpriced.’ It’s not a problem for them if it takes longer into sell.

We were really lucky with our estate agent when we bought. She said ‘it’s not my house I won’t be offended’ when asking for feedback and so we could be brutally honest. It also helped her identify what we might like and smoothest sale ever!

Jc2001 · 18/08/2025 19:45

BettysRoasties · 17/08/2025 15:05

A proper shower over the bath I could live with, not one of those from the taps types. I mean no shower at all, just baths. Last time our shower broke we actually went away while it was getting replaced, I just cannot sit in a bath of my dead skin cells and pretend I’m clean after.

Our bath only gets used to clean large items like the massive cooking pot and suitcases things like that.

Just how much skin are you shedding on a daily basis 😂

Laxoverhols · 18/08/2025 19:46

Jc2001 · 18/08/2025 19:45

Just how much skin are you shedding on a daily basis 😂

Presumably @BettysRoasties changes her bedding sheets daily?!

Blablibladirladada · 18/08/2025 19:53

The estate agent was rude…

BunnyVV · 18/08/2025 20:15

I don’t think they’re offended. They’re sales people. They’re disappointed!

Saz12 · 18/08/2025 20:36

If it's to the EA, not the vendor, and out if earshot of neighbours etc... then yes, tell the truth! The EA can then water it down "their taste is for less characterful properties" or whatever.
Just be nice about it - the ea probably likes the bits of the house theyre pointing out- "The kitchen is a great size but I feel the units need replaced". Rather than "no, the kitchen is not lovely it's cheap old plastic crap and needs replaced"

Often people view things that only just meet their criteria, or need a compromise, or whatever. EG you might need 2 bedrooms with somewhere to wfh. When you view, there's no practical wfh space. So the feedback becomes "we needed 3 bedrooms" rather than it's "too small". Or "The bathroom is dated" really means "its not special enough for us to pay that price and then have to redo bathroom".

vickylou78 · 18/08/2025 21:54

I think the EA may have been offended that you didn't agree with her 'opinion' of the kitchen.

If she said something along the lines of 'this is a great kitchen' and you basically said 'no it's crap' and so in essence disagreed with her professional opinion on it.

Now I'm not saying your wrong... Or wrong to be honest.. but the EA may genuinely have thought the kitchen was nice and that it was a selling point and so you may have come across as doubting her professional opinion on it. In circumstances like that was someone is saying oh look isn't this lovely (and it's crap) I'd probably just say 'oh yes i can see the potential but I was hoping for something a little more modern/traditional/neutral'

CatMummyOf3 · 18/08/2025 22:15

namechangetheworld · 17/08/2025 21:55

Used to work for an estate agent. We definitely never passed anything negative onto the client about their decor/dated kitchen/clutter/dog smell, i.e. anything that could remotely cause offense and spoil the client/agent relationship. Often turned it into something slightly more palatable like "the third bedroom is a little smaller than they hoped for" or "just needs a little more work than they were wanting to do."

People who complained about daft things like dated bathrooms and wallpaper were written off as time wasters, which they always were, and ushered out fairly quickly. People who are actually serious about buying don't give a shit about a dated bathroom or terrible wallpaper.

Oh and if a property is overpriced you can guarantee the agent already knows this and has already tried to convince their client to price it lower. Sadly, people tend to think they know far better than the actual professionals.

Edited

As someone who is currently selling a property, I would much rather be given the actual feedback, not something more "palatable". Why lie?

If multiple viewers don't like the decor, we might consider changing it; if it smells of pets, maybe that could be fixed with a damn good clean (to use your examples). We're not looking for best mates, we're looking to sell the property! The best way to maintain the client/agent relationship is honesty.

Oh and if a property is overpriced you can guarantee the agent already knows this and has already tried to convince their client to price it lower. Sadly, people tend to think they know far better than the actual professionals.

This may be true for where you worked, but it's not always the case. We were verbally told to expect to receive somewhere between £x and £y, but to market it at £z. The written contract however was worded that it was our instructions (bs). And we're still waiting for the "almost guaranteed" buyer within 3 days of listing 🙄

GFBurger · 18/08/2025 22:49

I’d go with cold brutal truth. It’s their job to sell it to you.

One estate agent tried selling us a house with an awful black and red bathroom as ‘this is where SHE was allowed to go WILD’. I didn’t like the SHE connotation at all… so corrected him with ‘or HE went MAD’

But we bought the house anyway! You can always change a bathroom. Sent me a bit loopy until we could afford to change it!

Wolfpinkola · 18/08/2025 22:54

Sounds like you have much better taste than the Estate Agent and she knew it

prelovedusername · 18/08/2025 23:14

Former estate agent here. I’m surprised at the EA’s reaction in your OP. Unless it was her house you were viewing it’s her job to listen to your feedback without judgment. You should be able to be brutally honest with the EA, in fact it’s helpful as they need to know what is preventing a house from selling.

it can be difficult providing feedback, vendors tend not to take criticism of their home well, so EAs will often sugar coat it if they can. If the same things keep coming up they will feed that back as it may be something that can either be changed or needs to be factored into negotiations. If it’s just personal taste they will fudge things, nobody appreciates hearing that their decor is dated or uninspiring.

CarpetKnees · 19/08/2025 00:34

As someone who is currently selling a property, I would much rather be given the actual feedback, not something more "palatable". Why lie?
If multiple viewers don't like the decor, we might consider changing it; if it smells of pets, maybe that could be fixed with a damn good clean (to use your examples). We're not looking for best mates, we're looking to sell the property! The best way to maintain the client/agent relationship is honesty.

All of this.

@namechangetheworld
"Oh and if a property is overpriced you can guarantee the agent already knows this and has already tried to convince their client to price it lower."

But if you were to tell them "anything negative onto the client about their decor/dated kitchen/clutter/dog smell, i.e. anything that could remotely cause offense and spoil the client/agent relationship." that might help them to understand that it isn't just the EA, but actually the prospective buyers who think the property is over priced.

Like most others on this thread, I would want to know why people weren't interested.

Cooksmart · 02/10/2025 15:16

Any progress in your property hunt op? Or are you now blacklisted amongst agents 🤭 @Apricotily

Nearly50omg · 02/10/2025 16:06

Unverified · 17/08/2025 14:50

So a property that ticks every other box but only has shower over bath…. You wouldn’t bother viewing? @BettysRoasties

Have you considered that they may be disabled and actually unable to get into a bath Unverified?

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