Loser no friends

[Kentgirl456]

So I’m 36 single no real close friends or anyone I feel connected to , surely I can’t be the only one , I have an older daughter and young child of 6 - two jobs and I’ve never felt lonelier - I don’t even really kno why I’m posting this , I try an fill all my time so I guess I don’t feel the aloneness but with it being the holidays it can’t be helped x

I honestly dont think your alone here - I think a lot of people are in this boat but just dont admit it. I only have a few friends that I done see that often as I got older I decided I only anted genuine friendships and not those where they talk about you as soon as you leave the room or you get the vibe they cant be happy for you. I think get some hobbies you will the meet new people with similar interests. Hope that helps a bit.

You’re very busy and probably haven’t had time to cultivate new friendships.

look for a local lively church ( you don’t have to be a Christian or go on a Sunday) they’ll have lots going on and will be very welcoming

You’re definitely not alone in this, I think a lot of people feel very lonely at the moment, myself included

Similar age, no very good friends and a few that I keep in contact with. I think it's reasonably common.

It’s super common, particularly amongst women with children. I have one close friend and we barely manage to catch up so maybe only once or twice a year.

You aren’t a loser at all!

I’m in the same position. All I do is work it seems.

Why, OP? What do you think has meant you are in this situation? Did you previously have friends at any point?

I feel exactly same. On surface all is fine, but spend huge amount of time on my own and feel abit lost. Sick of asking people to go and and do things, so trying very hard to be proactive and be sociable. I have no real advice, but know how hard it is.

Same. Wfh, little ones, single. So sad, I was the life and soul in my late teens/early twenties then met my ex who is a narc and alienated me. I have 3 friends who live v far, 2 in other countries. Narc ex sees little one for 1hr a week supervised so I have no time for hobbies/socialising anyway

This is so very common. You are not a loser.

Are there ways you can get yourself involved in your community? Check local Facebook pages and ask for advice on meeting up with other parents etc.

Do you work? Try and get yourself involved in work socials and making an effort to chat to people and make connections that aren’t about work.

Can you be more involved with things at your children’s school? Do they do parents socials, ask for helpers etc?

No real advise. , but yes I feel the same I have 3 friends , who I class as my good mates , and 1 I used to see quite a bit and now has a new partner and barely can get a date with her if he’s there , 1 has loads of other friends and seems to put all her time and money into the others so when I ask if she wants to do something she’s all booked up , and then 1 who lives very far away and who never really invites me to see her I do mention it , but I don’t feel she can be arsed so puts me off actually making the effort to go, and and once I found out she came back and met with other friends here and I never even got an invite . I feel the same way lonely and also feel kinda rejected a lot .

YANBU. I have no friends either. I’m off work at the moment. DC is away with his dad and I haven’t left the house or spoken to a soul for eight days.

Yeah I’ve always had a best friend but due to having a young child and splitting up with the dad - the friendship faded as child care was virtually impossible and was also living with my mum as I had to move out of the house - I do have a couple of friends but I’ve noticed that there not deep and just virtually talk about themselves which I don’t mind as I don’t mind listening - but I just love to meet my tribe instead of overthinking and feeling so alone - I have a care job and I work in a shop so surrounded by people whilst working as I love listening and meeting people but just not close to anyone - and feel very alone to the stage I get worried if I got ill what on earth would happen x
when I see people on fb with a bestie or a group of pals I can’t help but feel sad, guess I notice it more in the holidays and even tho I do see people sometimes even that can make me feel so alone in a strange way - like I’m almost robotic , guess I just feel quite uncared for and like an outsider - I’m not sure filling all my time is the answer don’t really know what is x