So just to give you a summary- my OH immigrated here and I sponsored him. He was educated in his home country but unfortunately this doesn't mean much here. I was happy to support him for awhile until he got on his feet and found a decent job, the problem is I think he became too comfortable.
Whilst he had a job but no savings for around 10months, I had saved up money for a deposit for a house over a few years-I bought this house without his help or with his family's support. I was ok with this at the time as I was happy to have my own home and get on the property ladder. I also borrowed him money for many different things at the time which has added up to a large sum of money that he still owes me. Unfortunately even though he started working and once we were in our own house, he did not support me with bills etc as he has a gambling issue and lost the money from his income for the year!( I didnt realise this at the time and I was just asking him every month to pay his way and he would make excuses that the money would come in a few days because he owed this person money etc /which became weeks and then months). In the end his family intervened and all of this came to light. He is now contributing to the bills/expenses but sometimes misses a month due to owing other people money/not having savings to get by for the month etc.
I think I am frustrated because I don't see the financial situation changing anytime soon, he has poor money management skills and has never saved money in his life and gotten away with people bailing him out. I did not have this and I now want to enjoy my life but with my OH's issues I feel like I will have to support them all the time which is exhausting. And I remember someone saying that when the woman earns more than a man or is the breadwinner, it is a recipe for disaster. I am scared these feelings are not going to go away and I am not sure what the future holds? Or is this normal and I just have to suck it up being the wife and support my husband? Please advise. Sorry the post is longer than I expected.