Aged 16 in school with aged 20 working, driving etc.

[LastPodcastOnTheLeft]

Dating Would you be comfortable as a parent with this set up?

Both seem happy.

I’m not sure I understand the question.

You have 2 children, one of whom is a young adult. Each are doing appropriate things for their age. What is the “set up”?

I don’t understand.

More words needed op. We can't see inside your brain

Sorry I mean as a couple dating

So year 12 student with 20 year old.

Back in 80s, no-one would have battered an eyelid. Today, people would consider the gap too large.

Do you mean 16 year old school kid dating 20 year old adult who has job etc? No i wouldnt be happy with that at all.

When older a 4 year age gap is fine but at that age school child and adult - albeit young adult - not acceptable. The elder woukd have fsr more influenxe/ability to coerce.

I've edited the post, sorry for the confusion.

Would absolutely not be ok with this!

I have a dd 16 and it would in no way be appropriate for her to be with a 20 yo adult. She wouldn’t want to anyway.

When I was growing up (90s) this was completely normal. Most of my friends had older boyfriends and it was aspired to. Now… not really.

@Silverbirchleaf I'd say even in the 90s okay but possibly frowned upon now?

As the mother of a 16yo, no I would not be happy with this. It’s an adult dating a child.

We had many cases in my country like this, all girls married these boys later on, after been to uni or just ended school. I personally did not have that case in my life or my daughters lives and always told them to wait until they are at least 20 and see the world first before any of this

so, no, not ok but I am surprised it is so common in the UK with your laws. We have not got any like this

I’d question why a 20 yo wants to hang around a 16 yo

Met my partner aged 17 he was 27, celebrated our 50th wedding anniversary last year.

I'd say both DH and I would be horrified if one of our dds had dated a 20 year old when they were 16. Which is very hypocritical of us, considering I was 16 (and in sixth form) and he was 20 (and working) when we got together in the 90s. 😬

I have a 16 year old and I would certainly not be happy with this despite me dating a 21 year old when I was 17!! I think 16 year olds seem younger these days (I’m now 43). Well my daughter and her friends are anyway 🤷‍♀️

They are definitely ‘younger’ nowadays which I’m really happy about. Dd is tracking, thankfully, about 3 years behind where I was at her age in terms of ‘adult stuff’. Has never drunk, smoked, held hands or kissed anyone yet and is still quite far from it. She’s 16.5

I wouldn't be happy - I presume it's the girl who is 16?