Would you find this awkward?

[2024i]

I met A & B at an old workplace. A got married, invited us to her wedding and introduced us to C.

We all met up in June. I attend Pilates classes and B & C wanted to go with me. I have a gym membership bonus to give them a free class & gave them the discount details. They were happy with the idea that we’d go together. They wanted us to make a day of it and do other things after, so we agreed a date for this weekend. I suggested an event after the class, which they wanted to go to.

I don’t have C’s number, so since that date, B was acting like a conduit between us after I saw them. I found this awkward because the outing could have been discussed with all of us in a group chat. Instead B would say “C said this” to me, I’d reply, she’d forward that to C. Just seemed like a weird dynamic. Eg I asked B if they’re wanting to book tickets to the event, but B wouldn’t confirm until this week. The event is this weekend, and the tickets are sold out now so we can’t do that.

They don’t want to go Pilates anymore either - turns out that they did use my gym bonus but attended without me earlier, so they’d have to pay for their next class which they don’t want to do. It seems they are now going shopping/lunch together and I have a “come if you want” invite. Would you find this awkward? Cause I feel like a 3rd wheel almost. It seems like I’ve been sort of disinvited from whatever we initially planned this weekend.

They've basically mugged you
Don't go to lunch, drop them

Ahh thanks, I didn’t know if I was being too harsh by wanting to distance myself.

Did you comment how rude it was to use your free class and go without you? They (or at least one of them) is a true CF

Wow, this sounds like a Wendy situation on speed. Rude CFs, definitely distance yourself.

@qotsa no… I was not surprised about that, given how strange the communication had been by that point. It seemed like I was in the dark.

thanks! I haven’t heard that before, what’s a Wendy situation?

A Wendy is old Mumsnet lore, when you introduce a new friend to an existing group then the new one freezes you out. There's a thread somewhere in classics.

All to say, sack that lot off.

Yeah they've absolutely mugged you off and no way would I let this go without commenting that they are a pair of rude CF and would then block them.
With 'friends' like this you wouldn't need enemies would you

I might join them for shopping and see what the dynamic is there - sounds like the communication has been a bit strange and they might not have expressed themselves very well and they’re just changing the plan not intending to disinvite you entirely.

Once you’re there you’ll know if you’re wanted and can act accordingly!

I'm a bit rusty on this, but I think this diagram may help with your dilemma - where you are 'x'.

Thanks everyone. I don’t know whether to say anything or just slow fade.

The last message to me was the “come if you want” invite.

I’d say something like “Ah I thought we were doing that together, how strange. I’ll leave you to it.” Kind of like pointing out that you can see how they’ve acted, but moving in and leaving them behind without any drama

Yeah I dont understand why B didnt set a group chat except that maybe you were used from the start

weird isn’t it!

I just remembered that C got annoyed with me as I didn’t follow her on Instagram. The conversation started as she was randomly staring at my phone screen and saw I had the instagram app installed, then confronted me saying “you have instagram but didn’t add me. Are we not friends?” B stepped in to tell her I don’t use it much so it’s not personal then she piped down. I’m guessing that has something to do with it.

Tbh it sounds like one of those situations where not everyone you lose is a loss