Fostering agency and Local Authority won’t accommodate one journey via taxi

[Fostering2025]

Hey everyone,

me and my partner have recently been accepted as foster parents. We’re with an agency who all along have said they have foster parents who work part time and even full time on their books.

As soon as we were approved we were sent two referrals of children from a nearby town, which we expressed interest in. However one evening my partner works until 5 and I’m working in London that day. That’s the only day he couldn’t pick them up but would be home in time for them (as he could drive straight home instead of driving 30 mins to pick them up). So we asked if we could put them in an after school club or arrange contact at that time and then have a taxi take them home as I’ve heard this is something they can assist with from both a friend who is a teacher and another who is a social worker.

However both the fostering agency and local authority were appalled by the idea of the child coming home in a taxi and said it would make them feel different from other children. We explained it wouldn’t be forever as me and my partner want to do the fostering full time eventually but just for now to give my partner time to become accustomed to fostering and make sure the child is happy with us.

I just want to check is this really the worst thing to ask for? We’ve been through the entire process of being approved, the room is ready and we’re so excited. My partner left his full time career to do fostering (and has a part time retail job to keep money coming in). We haven’t had a referral since and it’s been 2 months. Is this really that much to ask?

Would like to hear your experiences of being foster parents and working.

You’re just never going to be selected to be the preferred foster carer when it goes to court or etc is my view. Both of you having job commitments doesn’t sound ideal - my old agency said one person had to be the full time carer.

An unaccompanied child in a taxi won’t get approved by anyone I’d say. Maybe after you’ve been fostering a while and you can have family members as your approved babysitter (they have to have enhanced DBS check) it might work.

Your partner needs more time to become accustomed to fostering? So wait until he’s ready before going on the agency’s books.

I am also of the view that if you think that this is ok for the foster child then you need to raise your awareness of what the child is likely to need in terms of your time, care and support. They will likely need so much reassurance and encouragement around going to school, not to mention the chats with their teacher at the end of the day if they have had a difficult day (likely) and other school meetings. You will need to consider one of you at least having long term leave or sabbatical off work for “trying it out for a bit”.

How old is the child anyway?

Sorry but if the children are young enough that they need accompanying to and from school then they need a parent to do that. Before/after school club is fine, but not taxis. If a non-foster child was too young to travel to a from school alone, the parent would have to use a properly registered childminder or after school club until they could pick them up. Why would foster children be any different?

I’m going to copy here what I said on a thread about someone fostering for the first time:
You will need to have a lot of flexibility with work, the amount of appointments, meetings, time supporting the child, following up on making sure that the support is in place e.g. school have done everything they should have, birth family visitation and contact etc is demanding. Basically consider your role as emotional support human and personal assistant for that child 24/7 - it’s intense. Trying to work on top of that is hard. Most people I know who foster either don’t work or are freelance in creative work (painting, ceramics, writing) to fit around the child’s needs.

The fostering board might be a good place for you to read about other people’s experiences
www.mumsnet.com/talk/fostering

Wow how did the partner get approved ??

did he fess up that he’s not yet ready and needs time to become accustomed???

don’t foster kids !
they don’t need this shit !

It's really rare to do taxis to school for fostered dc (who aren't SEND) where I am. You'd be expected to cover your costs with the fostering fee paid. It is really expensive (think £200 per one trip a week or £10k pa). It has to go out to tender for local taxi companies. They might also need an escort if they're likely to get out of the car (some do). I only see it for court ordered situations or short term emergencies eg carer is in hospital.

I thought children often went home from school in taxis if they were entitled to free transport? I've seen a couple of taxis picking up from our very small local primary so I'm surprised it's such an issue. Lots of kids also get the school minibus, why would a taxi be considered a worse option and not suitable for certain kids? I wouldn't have had any problem with ds being brought home in a DBS checked taxi if necessary - why would I? It's no wonder there's a shortage of foster carers.

All parenting, including foster parenting, involves you constantly putting yourself out to meet the needs of your child.

My children both get taxi transport to and from school every day - SEN school. I appreciate the circumstances are quite different however I am a bit surprised that this would be a deal-breaker for one journey a week presumably with a consistent driver and escort.

@Bobbybobbins it wouldn't be a consistent driver or chaperone, it never is! SEN transport is arranged differently, and they don't have capacity to get involved in these type of arrangements.
Children who are in foster care have very different emotional needs and the transition to and from school is a key part of the support.

For those wondering why a taxi might not be a good idea, imagine this.

Your 8. You’ve just been separated from your mum and siblings. You are living with complete strangers in an area 40 miles from where you came from. A different school, teachers and all the kids are calling you weird because you don’t live with your birth family. You only have one toy, one photo and a few clothes from your previous life. You feel totally lost and alone.

Do you really think it would be ok that that child is not met at the end of the school day by a known adult who is meant to be your safe place?!!!

and what happens when the taxi doesn’t turn up? The kids left on their own ?!?! Already abandoned or neglected and the one person who’s meant to be looking after them - and being paid VERY well to do that! - just leaves them to a what? A random taxi driver? The taxi drivers who do school runs aren’t just anyone they are very well vetted and there’s no way you’d get one of these as they will all be booked permanently by the local authority and you’ll just have any old taxi driver picking up your foster child? Awful behaviour from the start!!! Just tell your partner to go back to a proper job and when you can grow up and actually adult and parent properly consider fostering again

That’s what I’ve heard, and yes I’d be home to greet them

I don't think a taxi is an appropriate solution. Could you or your dp ask for a flexible arrangement so you can collect?

Foster carers are definitely expected to accommodate the child's needs rather than try to fit the child into their lifestyle.

They would be 11

Hey everyone,

Thanks so much for your messages! It’s appreciated. I think actually we’ll probably consider whether fostering is the right route for us. We’ve spent over year deciding and going into the process and being approved. And we were looking forward to giving this child a lot of time, love, support, caring home and fun days out, but I don’t think we’re in a financial situation where it’s feasible, even if my partner is working only 14 hours a week. We did ask his work if they could change hours but they flat out refused and living off my salary alone would be a bit too tight, so perhaps we’re not the best candidates for this and makes sense why most foster parents are either retired or looking after 4+ children at a time.

From lots of private messages it seems like other people have been misled or unsupported by fostering agencies.

11 is even more important that you are there. The older ones will be more vulnerable to bullying (not the right clothes/phone etc). There’s also the risk of running away/county lines and other risks (doesn’t take much to google for what kids in foster care face in this respect).

Whatever the age, they will feel very let down by every adult and your role is to convince them that you will not let them down ever. That means being present and giving them your undivided attention. It’s not like babysitting - it’s more like being a therapist and advocate for that child. It’s not for the faint hearted.

Ah crossed posts with you @Fostering2025 I see you have had a rethink. If you do want to help the children in care then you could look at being a mentor for them. This involves meeting them at regular intervals and being a sounding board - imagine a very helpful and kind aunt who understands!

What if there is an accident, other disruption, vehicle breaks down? My friend does work as a foster parent but she had to get special permission and have childcare in place with back up care too.

Yes however those children are escorted and it is usually part of a routine to and from their structured lives. Children in Foster care are so so vulnerable and who knows what trauma they’ve been exposed to. The major life transition into a foster home must be terrifying and isolating for them as it is.

it’s asking too many transitions from the child.

Taxis are for when alternative transportation isn’t an option not part of childcare. What if your dp was stuck in traffic? After school club could be ok providing the children don’t have additional needs/ behavioural issues but they need to settle in first

Your attitude is why CEP are disgusted with the system. A child that has corporate parents shall have been through some form of trauma. They are requiring extra support from a reliable adult. Your child highly likely has a secure attachment and has not experienced significant trauma. Putting them in a taxi as though they are a parcel is not acceptable. I do not know how the potential fosters got through the vetting process. It had certainly highlighted another question for me to consider when sitting on a fostering panel.

You think it's okay to put children adjusting to life with a new family, in the back of a taxi after contact with their birth family? Wow.

This reads to me at you viewed fostering as an income source and were sold the dream of lovely perfect children. It is not a Disney movie, it is real life for a traumatised child, these children are not commodities or a way of making easy money.

I would have been very reluctant to recommend you as a foster carers with the information you have shared here. What would you do if you had a child of your own? Yes the state provides child benefit, however it is no where near the vast fees that foster carers receive, especially from the private agencies.

Fostering children is not merely about giving time, love and fun days out. It about commitment to a most likely traumatised child or young person. That means being fully committed 24/7 to provide stability. The financial aspect should be the least significant in decision making. Thank you for having the sense to see this before a child experiences more trauma.