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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Living in one bedroom

6 replies

brooksgabby · 10/08/2025 21:25

My husband excludes me from living/tv room by playing his own music v loudly

OP posts:
Florally · 10/08/2025 21:28

Ask him to turn it down or ask if you can watch something together?

I spend a lot of nights watching something with the kids as DH prefers sport but he watches in the bedroom and gives us the family space.

Having said that, I’d be happy to switch with him if it were just the two of us and not every night.

AnneLovesGilbert · 10/08/2025 21:30

I doubt that’s the only issue?

PamIsAVolleyballChamp · 10/08/2025 21:30

What's he playing? Hall & Oates? Stormzy? KPop Demon Hunters?

Panterusblackish · 10/08/2025 21:31

Neighbours must love that

GiantTeddyIsTired · 10/08/2025 21:40

When my ex used to watch Joe Rogan in the kitchen I'd just put on my noise cancelling headphones and wander around with an audio book or my own music.

You do need decent headphones though (these days I have no ex, but my airpod pros are pretty amazing - but my ancient bose over-ear are still my preferred for when I want it to be clear I'm not listening to the world.

PinkCampervan · 10/08/2025 21:42

LTB. However much it's costing you to live there, it's probably cheaper to rent a room as a lodger and you might get to live with someone considerate. Then you can work upto getting into a situation where you can afford a one bedroom flat, either to rent or buy, and the entire place will be yours.

Or if you decide to put up with him, go live your life outside and accept the "home" isn't, it's just somewhere to eat/sleep/wash/do laundry and store things. Join clubs, groups, take up hobbies. Get a car if you haven't already or an annual train pass, so you can explore other areas and go to the beach a lot in summer. Get a really good phone and monthly data package.

Don't bother introducing him to new friends you make or inviting him on your trips out with them, don't provide much information about what you're upto so it doesn't sound very interesting to him and above all don't provide him with a ready made social life, that he'll no doubt end up trying to control.

You might be legally married but you're living separate lives so if you're not going to leave you may as well embrace that. And get your ducks in a row ready for when one of you inevitably meets someone else.

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