To think my friend is being ridiculous about her BF’s parents money

[Cfcsummer]

My friend has been dating someone for a few months. It’s going fine - she doesn’t seem over the moon but is happy enough. We spoke about whether she sees a long term future at which point she told me that his father is a multi millionaire and that she can imagine that would make her future really comfortable (retirement, help possible house purchase etc) even if they didn’t get married.

I asked her if that is the main reason she can see a potential long term future and she said yes, and that if she wasn’t aware of that information then she probably wouldn’t be excited about it going that far as it stands.

My friend has a successful career and earns well.

AIBU to think she’s being ridiculous?! I couldn’t find the heart to say anything the other night but it has played on my mind since.

She’s being foolish banking on this. Families with that level of wealth put measures in place to protect it from opportunists. She may benefit through him during their relationship, but that money won’t be hers, or something she’ll likely ever be entitled to a portion of.

Lots do it and couldn’t live without a comfy life, often they end up divorced but it’s up to them, you moaning about it won’t change it.

It would be an exquisite natural consequence though

Wouldn’t she now be ‘someone who you had thought was a close friend’ , not a close friend op? Now you’ve realised how shallow and deceitful she can be?

I can't befriend someone like that. Feels so low class. I know a few multi millionaires. They can smell gold diggers from a mile away and thye are not stupid with money, hence they are wealthy.

I don't blame her one bit.

Women came with a dowry often too and the matched marriage suited the families, keeping the wealth protected.

My FIL is a multi millionaire. He has about 8 properties, multiple cars, lots of liquid cash, and flies business class, several times a year to take exotic holidays.

In the 17 years that I have been with DH, he has gifted us the princely sum of £0.00

We are okay for money, but DH's brother is on the breadline, and has been broke ever since I've known him. They live on a horrible estate, riddled with drug takers, there's no money for treats or holidays, and they have 2 small kids as well, who are obviously FIL's grandkids. They get no help from him at all.

If FIL lives until the average age that men live, on that side of the family, then DH will be 70 before he inherits and BIL will be 73.

She might be waiting for a veerrrryyyy long time.

Some people treat marriage like a business contract.
She is one of them.

It would not make me unfriend her though. What difference would it make to your friendship anyway?

She sounds smart. I always went for love and now I’m single and broke lol. Next time I’m going for money.

As the perceptive previous poster intimated you are referred to Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice.

As the perceptive previous poster intimated you are referred to Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice.

Not perceptive enough to realise that Elizabeth wasn't being serious.

People get married for all reasons

Plenty end in divorce

Isn’t marrying for Love just as big a gamble ?

You can be perfectly content and happy in a relationship without the “passion” .. those feelings fade. What’s wrong with building a future with someone you get on with ?

Well tbh that would be a bit of karma

The bit that puzzles me is that she thinks that as a mere GF they'd help her in any way. Wife, yes. But they have no obligation to someone who isn't related to them, even if they like her.