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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be so upset people think we left without paying?

241 replies

ShownOnCCTV · 03/08/2025 19:52

Went for Sunday Lunch - have been to the pub many times before.

15 of us celebrating a birthday - balloon for the birthday girl.

Spent a lot- three courses, plenty of alcohol as well always do - all this is irrelevant but want to put the whole picture - left a 15% tip- service/food/ everything was excellent as always.

Have just been made aware of a FB post, CCTV picture of a couple standing by our table, all of us in full view - with a big post from the owner of the pub saying that these people left without paying please find them

Below this is text saying how hard it is to run a pub without people doing a runner and in this wall of text it says 'the people at the table are not involved '

Cue loads of people saying- 'its a kids 10th birthday it can't be hard to find them'
'scum, who goes for a birthday and doesn't pay'
'great pictures, easy to find then- and a link to my work page'

I have rung up and asked them to take the post down - they refuse
I have asked them to blur our images they refuse.

My son has just had someone ring him asking him why didn't we pay.

I have posted on the page asking them to remove our images and that we have proof we paid but still nothing.

Owner is responding to other posts on the page so must have seen mine. Just saying how hard it is for people to walk without paying (I'm sure it is, but we are booked for next week- 20 people, but I shall now go elsewhere)

AIBU to be so upset about this- so many comments thinking we are thieves.

OP posts:
splothersdog · 03/08/2025 19:54

Send them a message saying you are going to report them for using your child’s image without your consent

CaptainFuture · 03/08/2025 19:55

Can you post a photo of your receipt, not that you should have to!

Spies · 03/08/2025 19:55

I'd make the restaurant aware that A family have just successfully sued over a similar incident where they were accused of not paying and slandered online.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cvgny7epgvpo.amp

Have they said why they won't take it down if you've proof you have paid or is it a case of someone pocketing the money and you have no proof?

ETA - sorry I misread is it the couple who have not paid in which case I suspect you could still have a case as it looks like it's referring to your family?

FionnulaTheCooler · 03/08/2025 19:57

I saw a comment on another post recently that said its a breach of GDPR to share images of CCTV where people in the background are identifiable. I'm not a lawyer so I don't know how true this actually is, but it might be worth messaging the restaurant again saying they've breached GDPR and if they don't remove the image immediately I'd be seeking legal action. I'd also trash their ratings by leaving reviews on Google and TripAdvisor detailing how you've been treated, maybe that will get them to take it down.

Screenager · 03/08/2025 19:58

Do you have proof that you paid?

Corrag · 03/08/2025 20:00

splothersdog · 03/08/2025 19:54

Send them a message saying you are going to report them for using your child’s image without your consent

Report them to who?

SitOnHisFaceIfHeDiesHeDies · 03/08/2025 20:02

I would be absolutely furious about this! They've lost a good customer and rightly so

cakeorwine · 03/08/2025 20:03

So basically it was the couple who hadn't paid, but your party is clearly in the picture posted and the owner has put somewhere in the text, "the people in the birthday party were not involved"

However, people can't be bothered to read and have jumped to their own conclusions that it was you who hadn't paid.

I think the owner needs to make it very clear that it was not you.

He should do a close up of the couple involved and blur you out

Jesswebster01 · 03/08/2025 20:03

Threaten them with this

PInkyStarfish · 03/08/2025 20:04

Sue them.

ANiceBigCupOfTea · 03/08/2025 20:05

So you've tried being reasonable and they still don't want to know.
Leave them a 1* review on Google/Trip Advisor or the like and get the 14 people there with you to do the same. This will grab their attention and might just get them to remove the picture.
And if they do contact you, tell them that their actions have lost them 20 paying customers for next week and on all the other weeks you'd be going and spending a lot of money.
I ran a business for years. I get how hard it is and I know how much pressure there is to make ends meet but this just isn't the way.

Original poster
ShownOnCCTV · 03/08/2025 20:05

Yes have proof of payment - but that isn't the issue - the owner knows we have paid.

She has said that she has put in the post that it isn't us - but it is in a wall of text and the people commenting evidently haven't read it.

She is now ignoring my calls.

Thanks @spies will post that

OP posts:
ButtSurgery · 03/08/2025 20:05

To be clear - is it the couple in the foreground who are alleged to have failed to pay?

If so, I'd be all over that photo on social media!

"Hi manager, to be clear we have tried to speak with you on the phone and sent messages but you refuse to remove the photos of our family celebrating with you today. As you already know, we paid in person and in full at the time for our bill of (amount) including a generous tip for the service.

You have now put up this photo and have refused to clarify that we are NOT the ones who have run off without paying, and you are now allowing people to make claims that we are thieves which you know is not true.

If you do not remove these images and provide a sincere apology, we will be forced to take legal action to protect our good name.

We also have a booking with you for x people on Thursday. Please consider this notice that the booking is now cancelled and we will not be returning to your restaurant given how we are being treated.

We have lots of sympathy for you at the loss of money in the current climate, but to use images of my family and children to spread lies or to try to go viral on social media is absolutely unacceptable"

Or something along those lines!

Goody2ShoesAndTheFilthyBeast · 03/08/2025 20:06

X post with you.
Keep posting and tell them you are being harrassed because of them and will be looking at your legal options.

BakingMuffins · 03/08/2025 20:06

Spam the post with your own family’s comments.

doodleschnoodle · 03/08/2025 20:07

God that’s awful! They need to crop the photo.

BusMumsHoliday · 03/08/2025 20:07

Is the explanation saying that it's not the people at the table (ie your party)visible without clicking through to open the post text? If not, I'd say that you want the information on the first line of the post or your images blurred or you'll be pursuing a libel suit. Send them the article above.

If someone looking at the picture, without clicking on the whole post, would reasonably it referred to your party as the "non payers" (and it sounds like this has happened from the response of your son's friend and the comments) that's defamatory. Screenshot all the comments.

I have a lot of sympathy for the pub but I also suspect they may want to keep the image of the large birthday group because 10+ people not paying is a better story than 2.

Original poster
ShownOnCCTV · 03/08/2025 20:07

cakeorwine · 03/08/2025 20:03

So basically it was the couple who hadn't paid, but your party is clearly in the picture posted and the owner has put somewhere in the text, "the people in the birthday party were not involved"

However, people can't be bothered to read and have jumped to their own conclusions that it was you who hadn't paid.

I think the owner needs to make it very clear that it was not you.

He should do a close up of the couple involved and blur you out

Yes, exactly this.

I'm crap with editing but even I can blur backgrounds.

OP posts:
cakeorwine · 03/08/2025 20:07

Clearly many people on here can't read the OP in the same way that people on Facebook can't read a Facebook post properly

Secretsquirels · 03/08/2025 20:10

I think that I would post some proof that you have paid (receipt, bank screen shot etc), with a shitty message saying something like:

“I appreciate that it must be very hard for pubs when someone walks out without paying. But our group are loyal customers who have always paid for our meals and have still somehow ended up in this photo online. We have contacted you privately with proof that we paid and you have refused to take down this post so I am now sharing the proof publicly and asking you publicly to take down this photo of myself and our children from this public forum. I will also be cancelling our booking for 20 next week.”

Batherssss · 03/08/2025 20:13

I would get as many screen shots as you can.
Get a video too.
Contact the police.
Ask to make a statement.
I also would involve any local media in the coming days.
You repeatedly asked them to take it down.
Their behaviour is disgraceful.
Tell the police about the messages you child is now receiving.

TY78910 · 03/08/2025 20:14

cakeorwine · 03/08/2025 20:03

So basically it was the couple who hadn't paid, but your party is clearly in the picture posted and the owner has put somewhere in the text, "the people in the birthday party were not involved"

However, people can't be bothered to read and have jumped to their own conclusions that it was you who hadn't paid.

I think the owner needs to make it very clear that it was not you.

He should do a close up of the couple involved and blur you out

from the OP it doesn’t suggest that they did say that in the post. Unless you’ve seen it?

I agree with PP, posting CCTV with other identifiable persons in the screenshot is a breach of GDPR and as a business (which the pub is), they would be subject to a fine if reported. So do that. We recently had a coffee shop chain post screenshots of kids vandalising the front of the shop (it is a franchise to the owners were emotionally driven to make that post) but the franchise company was informed and they did a public apology on behalf of that chain. I’m sure they were reprimanded behind the scenes too.

Original poster
ShownOnCCTV · 03/08/2025 20:15

@ButtSurgery thanks - I've put something similar but not as clear so might repost what you have put.

OP posts:
cakeorwine · 03/08/2025 20:16

TY78910 · 03/08/2025 20:14

from the OP it doesn’t suggest that they did say that in the post. Unless you’ve seen it?

I agree with PP, posting CCTV with other identifiable persons in the screenshot is a breach of GDPR and as a business (which the pub is), they would be subject to a fine if reported. So do that. We recently had a coffee shop chain post screenshots of kids vandalising the front of the shop (it is a franchise to the owners were emotionally driven to make that post) but the franchise company was informed and they did a public apology on behalf of that chain. I’m sure they were reprimanded behind the scenes too.

Show quote history

"Below this is text saying how hard it is to run a pub without people doing a runner and in this wall of text it says 'the people at the table are not involved '

But clearly people rush their reading and don't always read everything

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