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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To report this bump even though no real damage was done? *With diagram*

16 replies

BoobsOnTheMoon · 30/07/2025 14:31

I know you all love a diagram so there's one coming when the image gets past the filters!

Our local shop has a small pull in car park with space for about 4 cars. I went in just now, got back in my car, and was just faffing with phone etc before I set off when a van facing me pulled away to go back onto the road and knocked the back corner of my car. I know he hit me because I bloody felt it, and I know he knew he'd done it because he stopped!

I had my phone in my hand anyway and went to get out but the back of his van was stopping my driver door opening. He then pulled forward slowly so I got out but he immediately started driving faster out onto the road. I took a pic of the back of the vehicle then went to actually check for damage - at that stage I wasn't sure if he might have damaged my lights. They were fine which was all I care about tbh, my car is old and tatty so he might have caused some scuffs but a) I have no idea which scuffs were there before and b) I don't really care about scuffs anyway!

But then he stopped and reversed back quite fast, and got out. I was halfway back into the car by then and he came up to the driver's door and started yelling "did you fucking take a photo of my fucking van, what did you do that for, you're wrong in the head, you think I fucking hit your car don't you but I didn't, I never did" etc etc. I explained that I know he did hit me but that I was happy there wasn't any damage but he wouldn't shut up, and then his mate got out too and started filming me and shouting "SHE'S JUST TRYING CASH FOR CRASH" at people walking past. I was shaking at this point (I know I know, MN cliche but I actually was because they were being so aggressive) and trying to get my keys out of my pocket to drive away. Him and his mate started circling my car pointing out scuffs and telling me it was a shitter anyway and I should learn to drive (most of the scuffs predate my ownership apart from the ones on the bonnet caused when a small branch fell on it in a storm last winter!).

I got the engine started and began to pull away but he ran alongside the car yelling "you gonna fucking report me are you, stop now and I'll have your insurance details off you" but tbh I wasn't prepared to stop and talk to him any more at that point!

Anyway I'm now home and calmed down, I was genuinely rattled by the two of them and I know they were trying to intimidate me. But is it worth reporting and if so who to? I'm confident there's no real damage done, it was at very low speed and tbh I'd have just left it and driven off without another thought had he not come and started yelling at me! I only took a photo because he was obviously driving away and I was worried in case he had caused damage to the lights which I would have gone through insurance for. He only stopped and came back when I realised I'd taken a photo, tbh I wish I hadn't bothered now.

To report this bump even though no real damage was done? *With diagram*
OP posts:
HoskinsChoice · 30/07/2025 14:36

Go back to the shop. They will have footage of the crash and the threatening behaviour. Then report it!

huuskymam · 30/07/2025 14:36

I would absolutely report him to the police, not only for leaving the scene of an accident but for the aggression and intimidation.

BoobsOnTheMoon · 30/07/2025 14:38

HoskinsChoice · 30/07/2025 14:36

Go back to the shop. They will have footage of the crash and the threatening behaviour. Then report it!

The shop don't have CCTV outside (or inside - it's a tiny independent village shop and I know one of the staff, I'm absolutely certain they don't have cameras).

OP posts:
BoobsOnTheMoon · 30/07/2025 14:39

huuskymam · 30/07/2025 14:36

I would absolutely report him to the police, not only for leaving the scene of an accident but for the aggression and intimidation.

Will they even care though? I know he left the scene but there's no evidence that I didn't leave first, or that he was verbally aggressive (which isn't a crime anyway is it?)

OP posts:
FarmGirl78 · 30/07/2025 14:41

My ex is a mechanic and he told me to never assume there's no damage after any impact. Modern bumpers, and sometimes the front wing by the wheel are made of plastic. You can car, the bumper flexes in, bends the underneath support bar, and flexes out again. So it looks like no damage has been done. Remember how old cars used to have chrome bumpers? Well they've in essence been replaced by armature bars underneath, and the coloured panel is just to make it the car look neater and an actual cover for the metal bar underneath. You can't always tell nowadays.

I would 100% report this and get the local police to get the CCTV footage from the supermarket.

FarmGirl78 · 30/07/2025 14:42

Ah just seen that you don't think there'd be cctv. I'd still report it.

Drivingthevengabus · 30/07/2025 14:45

Ugh that sounds horrible. What a dick. I would be tempted to report it because of his behaviour. Was the van sign written with details of a company?

BoobsOnTheMoon · 30/07/2025 14:45

FarmGirl78 · 30/07/2025 14:41

My ex is a mechanic and he told me to never assume there's no damage after any impact. Modern bumpers, and sometimes the front wing by the wheel are made of plastic. You can car, the bumper flexes in, bends the underneath support bar, and flexes out again. So it looks like no damage has been done. Remember how old cars used to have chrome bumpers? Well they've in essence been replaced by armature bars underneath, and the coloured panel is just to make it the car look neater and an actual cover for the metal bar underneath. You can't always tell nowadays.

I would 100% report this and get the local police to get the CCTV footage from the supermarket.

No CCTV unfortunately.

I know that about hidden damage but I really am confident it was at low enough speed that it's not the case. I wasn't strapped in and I didn't shift in my seat when it happened, I just felt the knock. It really was just a knock like if you reverse into a bollard while parking. I just hadn't seen where he hit me so wanted to make sure the lights were ok as I could tell from the angle that it was on the corner of my vehicle.

OP posts:
BoobsOnTheMoon · 30/07/2025 14:46

Drivingthevengabus · 30/07/2025 14:45

Ugh that sounds horrible. What a dick. I would be tempted to report it because of his behaviour. Was the van sign written with details of a company?

No unfortunately it was plain black. I think they're builders, judging by the clothing, but nothing to identify them and it's a main road so loads of passing trade, no way of knowing where they'd come from or were headed.

OP posts:
Nsvdi · 30/07/2025 14:47

I wouldn’t report this to anyone -
not police or insurers.

Insurer will raise your policy premium, even if they don’t have to pay for anything - someone drove into my car when it was parked (causing quite a lot of damage) and my premium went up a lot.

reporting to police - your word against theirs. They are nasty sorts and it’ll just be a load of stress for nothing.

people are evil shits and there is sod all justice. Your best bet is to just move on and forget it.

tumblingdowntherabbithole · 30/07/2025 14:52

The police won't care or be able to do anything without evidence. Your insurers will only bump up your premium even though you're not at fault.

I'd do absolutely nothing.

SeaShellsSanctuary1 · 30/07/2025 14:56

Times have changed with reporting and insurance. I would report to your insurer as information only

Your insurance will ask if you have EVER been involved in an accident, claimed for or not. If you say no you are effectively lying and then the ⁹ problems start.

If the driver of the van who obviously is already an arse decides that he's going to claim that you hit him, you are going to cause major grief for yourself if you haven't reported it to your insurer.

The downside with all this is that it could affect your premium either way as you could be considered a greater risk for merely being involved. Years ago this would have been dealt with in a 'not to worry' fashion but you need to think about protecting yourself

BoobsOnTheMoon · 30/07/2025 15:07

SeaShellsSanctuary1 · 30/07/2025 14:56

Times have changed with reporting and insurance. I would report to your insurer as information only

Your insurance will ask if you have EVER been involved in an accident, claimed for or not. If you say no you are effectively lying and then the ⁹ problems start.

If the driver of the van who obviously is already an arse decides that he's going to claim that you hit him, you are going to cause major grief for yourself if you haven't reported it to your insurer.

The downside with all this is that it could affect your premium either way as you could be considered a greater risk for merely being involved. Years ago this would have been dealt with in a 'not to worry' fashion but you need to think about protecting yourself

Oh god I didn't even think he might try and claim that I hit him!! One of the things he kept yelling was that I should get out of my car and come and check his bumper as apparently there wasn't a mark on it, this proving that I imagined him hitting my car. But I wasn't about to go and look, under the circumstances.

OP posts:
SeaShellsSanctuary1 · 30/07/2025 15:11

BoobsOnTheMoon · 30/07/2025 15:07

Oh god I didn't even think he might try and claim that I hit him!! One of the things he kept yelling was that I should get out of my car and come and check his bumper as apparently there wasn't a mark on it, this proving that I imagined him hitting my car. But I wasn't about to go and look, under the circumstances.

Sorry, not trying to scare you but these things are a real pain.. It doesn't help when you are dealing with someone being an arse as they clearly aren't up for telling the truth.

BoobsOnTheMoon · 30/07/2025 15:14

SeaShellsSanctuary1 · 30/07/2025 15:11

Sorry, not trying to scare you but these things are a real pain.. It doesn't help when you are dealing with someone being an arse as they clearly aren't up for telling the truth.

I actually thought perhaps he wasn't insured, or already had points/driving convictions, from his attitude. It felt a bit OTT from someone who had just hit a parked car and driven off!

OP posts:
thecatneuterer · 30/07/2025 15:21

Nsvdi · 30/07/2025 14:47

I wouldn’t report this to anyone -
not police or insurers.

Insurer will raise your policy premium, even if they don’t have to pay for anything - someone drove into my car when it was parked (causing quite a lot of damage) and my premium went up a lot.

reporting to police - your word against theirs. They are nasty sorts and it’ll just be a load of stress for nothing.

people are evil shits and there is sod all justice. Your best bet is to just move on and forget it.

Sadly I agree with this.

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