To feel behind in life?

[ConsultMe]

I’m late 20s & feel very very behind in life.

I grew up in the Midlands then moved to London for university a decade ago (statistics degree). I rent in London alone. That’s one of the reasons I feel behind in life. Seems like all of my non-London peers are busy with house renovations with partners. I’m definitely not in a position to buy…

I have been on a decent salary the majority of my 20s - my first job was on £30k then I got promoted at 26 to £45k. I feel like I have nothing to show for it, that’s mainly gone to cost of living. I want kids for example but just feel like I couldn’t afford them!

Additionally, last year was difficult. My manager sexually harassed me at work, I was managed out. I basically had to leave my last employer and seek work with a new employer and start my career from scratch, lost all my old network etc. As a result, I kind of feel like my life is on hold. I haven’t been dating etc, just in a place of trying to build my confidence back up. I work in data science. I am single.

Aibu? I guess I’m also posting for advice, as feel quite low. London living is the only thing I like about my life, so it’s hard to consider leaving.

Is there a way you can take a year out? It sounds as though you are stuck in a rut and need some sort of catalyst to kick-start a change. You are just drifting along at the moment it seems.

Maybe do something bold that will move you up a gear!

I also think you need to stop comparing yourself to others - the word "behind" implies that you are behind someone else or some arbitrary standard you have set for yourself. Ditch all that rubbish and be free!

@Mischance is that a year out of working or out of university?😊

yeah I would love to do something different regardless - like spend a year overseas!

Aww thanks, you too! With a masters in AI you’ll have an amazing future :)

Omg! Guys!! I just secured a job interview with Apple! As in, the dream job! Can’t believe it

Congratulations 🥳🥳 and best of luck!

I very much felt the same way as you when I was late 20s in London. Frustrated at still renting, desperately wanting to buy a property, find a boyfriend etc. At 31 I managed it: bought a flat in a nice pocket of London and got into my most serious relationship to date. But guess what? It all went to complete shit 3 years later. 😅 A year after that I left the country haha.

I’m now a renter again, and building my life up from scratch somewhere new. Rushing to hit life ‘milestones’ by a certain age is not all it’s cracked up to be. 🙃