Please help me work out if DH or I was wrong here?

[lifeandlovee]

I’m off work this week with DC1 who’s on summer hols. He’s been a PITA all day so I’m not in the best mood.

Anyway, DH gets home from work, dinner is put straight on the table for him and I tidied up after. DC2 leads daddy to the oldest one’s bedroom and asks for the baby-ish play tills which are too high to reach, so he gets them both down and comes back to the kitchen. The next thing DC1 snatches one and DC2 kicks off screaming and crying inconsolably. DH then goes in the room and says “one each” after having given both to DC2 seconds before. By this point DC2 is totally having a meltdown, so I tell DC1 off and said “you’ve had all day to play with them if you wanted to but you suddenly only want them because DC2 has them” (I know this is the story of everyone’s life with 2 young kids)
DC1 seems to understand this and says “okay then” giving the till back wanting DC2 to stop screaming.
Then DH says “no one each” completely undermining what I’ve said.

We have now had a row about this and both of us think we’re right but he thinks DC2 should learn to share (age 2, just) whereas I think DC1 (age 5.5) needs to know not to snatch and not just want something because DC2 suddenly has it. WIU here!?

@champagnetrial haha! Dinner was over by the time this happened. And no restaurant style here I’m afraid 😂

Oh well in that case, no excuse for him! I was giving him the benefit of the doubt and thinking he had to rush back to eat, but if that was done, then yes, they wanted his attention. He had time to give it.

You had two small children all day and made the meal. I'm on your side!

So you actually used the situation to punish DC1 for their behaviour earlier in the day - hardly fair! You should have left DH to deal with it, instead you chose to step in and undermine him because in your eyes he was doing it wrong. And now you're complaining that he undermined you! Let it go and move on, tomorrow is another day!

YABU, your DH was right on this one.

You were unreasonable. He was in the first, then you came in when he was already handling it, so it was you undermining him, not the other way around. Plus his way made more sense anyway, you only need one till not 2. Rather than "you only want it because he had it" it's a young child wanting to play what their sibling is playing which is natural.