To be annoyed at nursery?

[Peep23]

My daughter is 2.5 and has been going to the same nursery since she turned 1 and I went back to work.

The day to day communication there has always been a bit sporadic (updates on the app not great) but she’s developing great, is generally happy there and up until the last couple of months I’ve had a good relationship with the staff looking after here so haven’t been concerned.

Since she’s turned 2 though she’s moved up into a bigger class and we’ve had a few issues since. They’ve change the drop off and pick up system so you can’t go in anymore which, whilst I get is quite common, has really affected day to day communication. The main issues though have been:

• She came home one day with the same nappy as we’d put her in that morning. No poo, but absolutely saturated with wee.
• Weve recently potty trained her and they don’t seem to be keeping much of an eye on her. She hasn’t had accidents at home for ages but she’s going through multiple clothes changes at nursery - and she’s come home with socks and shoes completely saturated with wee.
• They also have a high staff turnover and I’m never quite sure who her key worker is supposed to be.

Im seriously considering moving her, but I’m not sure if I’m being unreasonable and these all relatively normal issues. Am I ‘that mum’?!

My daughter is also 2.5 and I really wouldn’t be happy if that was her nursery! When she was potty training last year the staff were amazing and really good at asking if she needed to go and helping her. She’s at the point she can go to the toilet herself now at nursery but they will still help if she asks. They’ve also been really helpful at dropping her nap and popping her into preschool whilst the rest of her room naps as she’s the only one that doesn’t have a sleep after lunch. We get regular updates on the app too. I would look at moving her if I were you.

I would move her, that isn't acceptable. I would also put jn a complaint in writing. No nappy change for a whole day? Having an accident and not changing her? Absolutely awful.
And honestly, i came to read your post thinking it would be another parent hbaing too high expectations! This is a basic requirement, you are not unreasonable.

The nursery and staff sound poor
yes i would look at moving her

No those aren’t normal issues. I’d definitely move her. Leaving her in full nappies and shoes soaked with wee are unacceptable.

That’s very very bad
Move her
she’s can’t communicate

No. These are absolutely all issues that just wouldn’t be happening in a well run nursery.

I agree with PPs. Not attending to a toddler's toilet hygiene needs is very bad.

DD went to nursery from 1 year old to Reception, she never ever came home wet, ever. Even during the potty training phase.

We had other small quibbles, but not keeping a child clean, comfortable and dry would have been a deal breaker.

Thanks for your replies! So good to know I’m not being completely unreasonable. I have spoken to the nursery on both occasions and they’ve apologised and said all the right things, but it’s a case of me feeling like I’m just waiting for the next issue to pop up. I’ve been worried about the disruption to her by moving her as she is happy day to day, but think she’s old enough to handle it now.

More accident in nursery than at home is normal - they obviously can't physically watch as closely as you can with the ratios they have, plus often being engrossed in play while also further from toilets.

It's not normal to send children home with wee soaked shoes and socks on though. Either that happening once, or the nappy issue happening once, I could accept as human error (ONCE! and if we are talking 8-6 in the nappy, no) but that's too much.

For reference, my daughter has the odd nursery accident - one that stands out was an exciting trip to the library. She peed all over the floor and in her shoes. By the time I collected her, her shoes had been washed and were almost dry. I don't expect them to wash her things at all, but if I collected a wet or soiled child, I'd be fuming. I've complained for much less...

Totally unacceptable- I would move her.

She's being neglected, you need to report this. Make note of every incident and keep a diary

Move her and make a complaint. Leaving a child in one nappy all day is terrible!

As a former childcare worker, you're right to be concerned. Moving rooms as they grow is necessary, as children develop the equipment/toys in the room are no longer appropriate and this can be a time of adjustment. Potty training accidents can happen especially as they can be more distracted with playtime and 'hold on' instead of going to the potty. The nappy incident is completely unacceptable, did you complain at the time? However i find the biggest indicator that something isn't right is a high staff turnover. Has there been a change in management? You aren't being unreasonable to consider moving her though, I'd be upset if this was my DD.

At that age once is unacceptable but multiple times is a massive no they’ve not even noticed and changed her clothes for goodness sake your poor daughter. I’d be moving my child out of the nursery and as others say a written formal complaint. I’m that much of a bitch I’d go to the care inspectorate and report them. It’s basic care/hygiene they’re neglecting

Hi all - thanks for taking the time to respond! We’ve made the decision to move her as the trust has now gone with her current nursery, and it’s so reassuring to know I’m not expecting too much! We have found another nice nursery close by with great reviews so fingers crossed she gets on well there.

Not acceptable by no means

Not acceptable by no means

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