To feel uncomfortable when people comment on pregnancy bump size?

[Starry4321]

Currently 25 weeks with baby number 2. My first is two years old. Not sure if I am just having a low self-esteem day but feeling a bit self conscious after a conversation with an older neighbour. She came over and said ‘You’re awfully big for how far along you are in your pregnancy aren’t you? When I saw you a while ago I thought she’s either got fat or she is pregnant!’. I guess you are bigger with your second but the bump size comment has left me feeling a bit self-conscious. Am I ‘too big?’

I am extremely grateful to be having a healthy pregnancy. But the body size comments can sting a bit!

Honestly try not to take comments people say personally there rarely meant how they come out people can just be clumsy with their wording

It is awful that pregnant women are somehow public property. Your neighbour was rude. Stick two fingers up to her from the safety if your home! There is no right size for a pregnant woman.

It’s horrible isn’t it.

With my first baby there was a lady in work who kept telling me I was huge every time she saw me. I was so pissed off. One day I snapped and said ‘you’re huge too’.

With my second, a friend saw me and said I was massive. I saw her a few days later and she commented how big I was again in front of 4 other people. Everyone was saying no, she’s really small (I had extra scans because bump was measuring small). She said ‘yes, she is huge! You just can’t tell because she’s in a black top’.

Pregnant with third now and no one has said it yet, but I just hate that everyone wants to touch your bump or comment that you have one. It’s made me really self conscious this time round.

pricks.

The only thing appropriate to say to a pregnant woman is:

"I don't know how you're feeling with it but you look wonderful!"

that's it.

I’m still pissed off at the stupid customer who said ‘ooh look at the size of you, are you having twins?’ and laughed.

I know she wasn’t to know I’d lost one of my twins at 9 weeks, but it really stung. People should keep their comments to themselves.

This was a perfectly normal conversation to have with a pregnant woman before over 60% of the UK got fat.

In fact, pregnant women themselves would talk all the time about the size of their own bumps.

Maybe she just doesn't realise things have changed?

Either way, I'm sure she had good intentions and perhaps doesn't realise you think she's talking about your actual body fat rather than the size of the baby.

Please don’t listen to them. You are the right size for you and your baby.

When I was pregnant with my first child, a woman stopped me in the street and said ‘gosh, you’re brave’. On asking why, she replied. ‘Well, aren’t you worried it’ll be born with one leg, like you’

i just said no and walked off.

People have no filter. Please just enjoy your pregnancy and don’t let them get to you.

ps my children have a full complement of legs 😂

I would be furious if people had made such ignorant comments about my size when I was pregnant with my son. If they had, I would have been tempted to make an equally disobliging comment about them. "Mmmm . .. I was wondering if you have an eating disorder - you've got really fat, lately . . ." However, being brought up by my immaculately-polite mother, I would have remembered her advice in such circumstances - "Let it pass, dear. Let it pass." Plus, amused little laugh.

ldgso "With my first baby there was a lady in work who kept telling me I was huge every time she saw me. I was so pissed off. One day I snapped and said ‘you’re huge too’."

How did she react to that?

You could ask her if she meant to be so rude ?!

@CustardySergeantShe was clearly really embarrassed as she was a really large lady.

She messaged me after apologising.

I actually felt really bad after because it’s not the sort of thing I would ever say to someone and I think she genuinely hadn’t realised how shit it is to hear ‘you’re huge’ every 2 minutes.

My friend delights in telling people they are huge when pregnant. She is large herself at the best of times, in pregnancy she was even bigger but I bit my tongue. I'd never tell anyone they are huge, it's so insulting - pregnant or not. I feel she said it to make herself feel better. Ignore!! Some people seem to think it's a compliment 🤣

I couldn’t stand it either. With my first everyone kept telling me my bump was so small and I was so paranoid he wasn’t growing because of how often I was told my bump was too small. With my second I had an enormous bump and people were asking me how long I had left (thinking it was days) when I was about 18 weeks and then flabbergasted comments. Was quite a relief to have a very average sized bump for baby number 3 but still got loads of comments about carrying high / low. I’ll note that all 3 babies were pretty much the same size when they were born!! I get that people are interested and want to pass comment but I found it hard and felt really self conscious.

I had an absolutely huge bump when I was expecting my son. And right enough he was a huge baby when he was born.

But the comments I got were so embarrassing. This was over 30 years ago and I still remember 2 workman in the street nudging each other and one of them said to the other " I wonder what she's been up to then" and the pair of them laughing at me. I was absolutely mortified.