Dil

9 replies

YourLoudRoseEagle · 28/07/2025 16:16

Son and Dil visited for 1st time, they live 10 hours, driving, away.
We have 3 b/r bungalow, 4th b/r in basement. The 5 of us lived quite comfortably and happily growing up.
Dil made remark about how small our house was for 5 people……
We felt quite offended by her remark…

OP posts:

Evaka · 28/07/2025 16:19

What was the context? How did she phrase it? Was the visit good natured and friendly overall?

BonfireToffee · 28/07/2025 16:20

She's not wrong - it's a small house to have raised three children in. From the tone of your post, it sounds a bit like you're looking to take offence.

Why is the geographical distance between you and your son/DIL relevant? Am I missing something?

Aliksa · 28/07/2025 16:20

Perhaps she was a bit nervous and blurted!

3 bedrooms means a shared room for parents, then two of the kids doubled up and one on their own; no spare room. Perfectly do-able but not necessarily untrue to say that’s a bit of a squeeze. The living space in a house designed with 3 bedrooms often isn’t especially large, even if you manage to stash one of the kids in a 4th bedroom in the basement!

In the Uk not many people sleep in a basement room.

Ruggerlass · 28/07/2025 16:21

I wouldn’t be offended but I’d consider her very rude.

Aliksa · 28/07/2025 16:22

When my SIL first visited my parents she was absolutely horrified that they weren’t wealthy. She said she thought we would live in a country manor (I have no idea what my db told her!)

Db married her; she left him for a richer man ten years later because she said she thought she could do better. Ouch.😩

CheshireCat1 · 28/07/2025 16:25

It’s a bit strange that they didn’t visit before they got married, do you not see much of them.

Gossyboo · 28/07/2025 16:32

I mean she's entitled to her opinion, but it was very rude to voice it out loud. Personally I don't see the fuss with children sharing bedrooms. I only have 2 DC and they share by choice.

Original poster

YourLoudRoseEagle · 29/07/2025 22:34

They live 10 hrs drive one way from us. No we do not see them very often. We have been twice before they got married..
They are in the process of getting divorced this year..
My heart hurts for my son, had to sell their home , she has equity in it and he could not afford to buy her out…..

OP posts:

Titasaducksarse · 29/07/2025 22:37

I wish I was so offended after such a minor comment! Do you think there are others things causing you to feel so hurt from such an innane remark?

Flip