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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Partner having a go

3 replies

Leahloveschocolate · 28/07/2025 12:52

I've been with my boyfriend 5 years, and we don't live together. We both have children from a previous relationship.
I see him 3 times a week, I go over to his twice, then the third times I see him when all his family get together. He doesn't come round mine, he's never slept around mine, and he knows he's always welcome to.
2 weeks ago I was bitten by an insect, and I started having issues Friday. Went to the doctors, got antibiotics, but last night my foot started turning black.
I rang 111 and they sent me to a&e.
I didn't tell my boyfriend because I knew he'd be sleeping, and I know he doesn't sleep well on a Sunday because he's at work the next day.
I messaged him this morning and told him what had happened, and he rang and said "I told you yesterday to rest your foot and instead you was f around sorting your bedroom out" (I was tidying it because it was a complete mess).
I told him that it's easier said than done resting when you have no help off anyone (I have fibromyalgia too, so I struggle to keep on top of things).
I feel really irritated by that remark, am I being unreasonable for feeling this way?
I'm winding myself up. There's nothing stopping him from coming round to see me, it seems like its always me making the effort. We don't even have sex, he reckons his legs go weird, but is fine after oral 🤷🏼‍♀️
It feels like I'm making all the effort, although he is a.good, kind bloke.
That comment has thrown me though, not just what he said, but how he said it.

OP posts:
pinkyredrose · 28/07/2025 13:06

What does he add to your life? Your relationship seems rather pointless.

TheSandgroper · 28/07/2025 13:26

Jeez, I hope that the oral that he gives you in return is good. Because otherwise, you’re doing a huge amount of work to keep him happy with sweet fuck all in return, as far as I can see.

I hope your foot is getting better

SixteenClovesOfGarlic · 28/07/2025 13:31

This isn't a relationship is it? How does he enhance your life and make it fun? That's the only reason to have a boyfriend.
He just calls by to get a blow job? •edited as I just saw he doesn't even bother going to your house

He instructs you to rest your foot? Fuck that, who would ever taken an order from some bloke.

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