Moving | Mumsnet

Daygloboo · 2025-07-26T00:29:24+00:00

I'm.moving in a few months and I'm not sure how much interaction to have with new neighbours. It's not that I'm an unfriendly person but I do value my privacy. I'm.more than happy to be ' neighbourly' but I dont think I actually know what that means. I hate people just turning up on the doorstep . What is considered neighbourly behaviour.?.Are you supposed to invite new neighbours in for a cup of tea. I read some things on here about neighbours becoming a pain in the backside. I want to be friendly without giving the impression that I want to drop round everyone's house every five minutes for a natter. Have I got a wrong attitude or is it reasonable to want to protect myself. I'm really looking forward to going to the new place and I don't want to get my knickers in a twist about it before I even get there. Any suggestions?

ThinWomansBrain · 26/07/2025 01:38

Don't worry about it until you get there.
Say hello if you see them in the street or garden & introduce yourself.
If it's in an apartment block it maybe useful to introduce yourself to find out about the utilities of the building, but I don;t anticipate that anyone will be expecting you to invite them in for tea.

Original poster

Daygloboo · 26/07/2025 01:40

ThinWomansBrain · 26/07/2025 01:38

Don't worry about it until you get there.
Say hello if you see them in the street or garden & introduce yourself.
If it's in an apartment block it maybe useful to introduce yourself to find out about the utilities of the building, but I don;t anticipate that anyone will be expecting you to invite them in for tea.

Thanks

OP posts:

isitmytime · 26/07/2025 02:16

Just be polite. Say hello/morning/nice day etc in passing but nothing much more. Definitely no need to invite them in for any reason..
i think its neighbourly to accept the odd parcel if you feel like it and when they come to collect it just pass it at the door.

Original poster

Daygloboo · 26/07/2025 08:40

isitmytime · 26/07/2025 02:16

Just be polite. Say hello/morning/nice day etc in passing but nothing much more. Definitely no need to invite them in for any reason..
i think its neighbourly to accept the odd parcel if you feel like it and when they come to collect it just pass it at the door.

Yes that's what I was thinking. Friendly and be courteous if necessarily regarding parcels etc. but dont engage in much conversation..

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RaininSummer · 26/07/2025 08:49

I don't think there's any expectation to invite them in for a cuppa but introducing yourself and offering to accept parcels if they will too seems a good idea.

Lennonjingles · 26/07/2025 08:54

We are friendly with our neighbours, but in over 40 years, the neighbours have never been in our house, I have been in one neighbours once when they were having extension built. DH has been in theirs though, once because their cat sitter wouldn’t open a door and twice because DH is a Plumber and they needed advice. We do have each others spare keys in an emergency and for other neighbours we have their DS’s phone number in case of emergency. We are guarded as our previous neighbours split up and they wanted us to take sides, we were friends a spent a few evenings with them until it turned nasty. I think most people just say hello, introduce themselves and that’s all.

Original poster

Daygloboo · 26/07/2025 11:06

Lennonjingles · 26/07/2025 08:54

We are friendly with our neighbours, but in over 40 years, the neighbours have never been in our house, I have been in one neighbours once when they were having extension built. DH has been in theirs though, once because their cat sitter wouldn’t open a door and twice because DH is a Plumber and they needed advice. We do have each others spare keys in an emergency and for other neighbours we have their DS’s phone number in case of emergency. We are guarded as our previous neighbours split up and they wanted us to take sides, we were friends a spent a few evenings with them until it turned nasty. I think most people just say hello, introduce themselves and that’s all.

Thanks everyone. . This has all reassured me as I haven't lived in a road for a long time ( only in flats ) and I wasnt sure what the ' rules ' were..I wasnt sure if the expectation was that everyone is in each other's houses all the time and that you'd be seen as unfriendly if you didn't take part. But from what people are saying, it seems that basic politeness ( and of course helpfulness should an emergency happen ) is all that is needed really. So that's good. I wasn't relishing the thought of being 'nabbed ' for 20 minute chats every time I put a foot outside the door. I'm very busy and I've got a lot on my plate and I literally wouldn't have the time.

OP posts: