To not understand how so many people struggle with the concept of others having different experiences to them?

[thevassal]

So many posters on here refusing to believe that its possible for other people to have a different experience to them.

It's not even complicated concepts they struggle with (although the absolute worst are the posters who come onto threads bleating about "you'll miss them when they're gone" "I would do anything to hug my mother again" who can't envision not everyone is lucky enough to have nice families).

In just the last day or two I've seen posters assuming others must be lying because of reasons as ridiculous as their school not having broken up for holidays, shops not being open at a certain time and someone's local leisure centre having a different layout. The worst ive ever seen was an OP about someone's nan not putting a coat and wellies on her child before taking her out in the rain, to which a poster replied "but it didn't rain today?'

What? Help me understand! Is it stupidity, obliviousness or just an incredible level of self-obsession? I just cant conceptualise a thought process that goes "well it wasn't raining here today" or "well my leisure centre doesn't have a changing room near reception" and extrapolate that to "so it can't have rained anywhere else in the world" and "so nowhere else can have one either."

And these are factual things that can be easily proven - if so many people struggle to accept those differences, it must be even harder to empathise with someone who feels or thinks differently to them. No wonder people get stuck into echo chambers.

The ‘what about me’ effect

https://www.delish.com/food-news/a45446065/tiktok-bean-soup-what-about-me/

You see it all the time - the most annoying I see on here is anyone complaining about pregnancy / birth / newborn stage is always shot down within a few posts with a ‘I’d do anything to be in your position’ post.

I'm not the only one who laughed at the irony in the thread title, am I?

The "it didn't rain today" example made me laugh. As if we all live in the same village!

Indeed not.😀

Though I think I worry more about the social contagion aspect of social media — where people expect ‘cliques’ and ‘alphas’ etc at the school gate, or think that ‘mum guilt’ on returning from maternity leave is baked into the female psyche.

This is the internet its filled with people who have little or no life and they take great pleasure with posting an opposing opinion just to be awkward or to try to trip you up as they feel it makes them feel superior for a fraction of a second in their sad existence.

Intelligent debate is to be welcomed, post sniping is just part of the internet where the low get to feel high for a few lonely seconds 😉

I completely agree with you. It feels exacerbated on here because so many threads get derailed by people who are so completely unable to understand this.

I did roll my eyes earlier when someone confidently and incorrectly told me the layout of my local (and now demolished) leisure centre 30 years ago. When I hadn’t even named the county, never mind the specific leisure centre.

I think it’s just people trying to catch people in lies when there are a lot of false posts here. And because it’s such a UK based forum people forget that there are people posting from outside the UK. For me it’s the lack of humility in those posts and the bolshy confidence that their point of view is the only possible point of view.

It's the 'just get an uber ' crowd for me. Like everywhere has uber . I live 2 hours away from the closest area that has Ubers . So when a poster says 'I have no transport and can't get to xyz' and then they get replies saying 'why can't you get an Uber' it really makes me face palm .

Did you see the thread about the woman in a hotel in the middle of nowhere for work, and the hotel wasn't serving food? People just couldn't accept that Just Eat wasn't a viable option.

The Bean Soup debacle made me laugh.

The ‘what about me’ folk who also think they are witty and original and every time someone who does love camping or is looking forward to trying it out asks for advice on what to take and some camping refusenik twat pipes up “the number of the nearest hotel”.

@usedtobeaylis yes I did see that one ! Was infuriating to read and really felt for the lady.

Because lots of people are not very intelligent and lack imagination.

I think that a lot of people are simply not very nice, and don't see why they should be putting themselves in the shoes of others when their own shoes have done them well so far. They quite enjoy looking down on others.

Someone posts a recipe for sardine paste...

First comment

"But I'm allergic!"

It's the same as the "how can they afford X" posts.

Its any thread that starts "I don't understand how people like / do X" They usually run for pages but the answer is basically, people are different. Alongside it is that thing that lots of people do in conversation when you say "we just got back from holiday in Cornwall" and their response is not "oh how nice, whereabouts?" but "We hated Cornwall, we went to Scotland which was great and we did....."

My pet peeve is the one when people are struggling for childcare and the responders cannot accept that there ISN'T a childminder or relative or friend available, or that the dad cannot / will not step up. You can't make them and not everyone has a wide circle or big, willing family. If an OP says there isn't, there isn't.

I enjoy reading MN specifically because it gives me insights into different views/opinions/lifestyles I wouldn't otherwise have.

It always interesting to see things from a different (even if it’s bonkers 😆) perspective

I laugh at this exact thing every Halloween when lots of English posters are adamant that Americans invented guising/trick or treating and nobody in the UK ever did it until very recently.

My favourite one is the sheer disbelief and accusations of lying when anyone Scottish posts anything about shopping on a Sunday after 4pm.

Wedding ones also bring out the best in people. So many think "we don't do that in my family" is the same as " "that doesn't happen"

There was a recent thread about accents/pronunciation where multiple people (not all of them from the South East) seemed unable to grasp that there are many regional accents in the UK and many different ways of pronouncing words. It was as if they’d not only never left the town they were born in but had never watched TV or listened to the radio. It was quite exasperating to read- and I didn’t even attempt to post on it!